2010 June:

Sometimes I just sit in front of my computer, simply staring blankly at the desktop background. No window open, not doing anything at all, just nothingness. I put on my earphones and just listen to music. Today was the first day I realized I was doing just that. I closed my eyes and drifted into a new world. I closed facebook and stopped reminiscing about how shitty this summer was going and just…drifted… along a new galaxy. My breathes shortened, my heart beat faster, all there was left was my music and my mind. Music seemed to fuel me this summer, but it was also my enemy at times. I’m jealous of it for so many reasons, but I didn’t think of that now, I just imagined. Stars, planets, little ships flying around futuristically (I just saw star trek). As I was flying through space and time I stopped a minute to look at a planet that looked like nothing I had ever seen before, not even in my dreams. Orange , purple, blue, and red clouds of dust covered it, with rings that were some color I didn’t even know the name of, the only way to describe it would be… morning bloom. I was curious what lay beneath the beauty, so I flew to the planet. When I landed on the surface of the planet I was astonished. Plant life, as if I were in an Amazonian jungle from the future, surrounded me. I could see in the distance a field of the strangest yet most amazing wild flowers. I walked towards the field, taking in all of my surroundings. Little creatures scurried about, mice/squirrel like things climbed trees and vines and chewed on pieces of what looked like fruit. The greenest moss grew on every tree, it almost glowed. Flowers and trees as tall as the CN tower grew everywhere. Once I had gotten to the field the song changed in my head. I fell to the ground as the piano and harp began to play perfectly together. All the beautiful smells and colors, the long grass felt so good on my skin, everything was perfect. “What do you need to get your opus?” I suddenly heard a deep voice say. “Samantha!” I took my head phones off and smelt cats, clean clothes and coffee. I felt the hard surface of the chair under me, and the chill of an air conditioner. I stared into the face of a hairy chested, small eyed, bald man. “What?!” I shouted to my father, disappointed that my world had vanished and I couldn’t reach it again for some time. “What do you need to get your opus?” He repeated. “I can’t do this right now…” I replied. A sound of annoyance left his lips as I placed my head phones back on my ears…