IN CLUBS, A POTENT DRUG STIRS FEAR OF AN EPIDEMIC

Some know it as crystal. Others refer to it as Tina, a campy
abbreviation of its other name, Christina. But among the habitues of
New York's frenetic gay club scene, the extraordinarily powerful
stimulant commonly known as crystal meth is earning a new nickname:
the Evil One.

Once largely confined to California, the Midwest and the Southwest,
where it has upended the lives of gay men and a blue-collar
constituency of truckers, bikers and housewives, methamphetamine is
increasingly becoming a conspicuous part of New York's clubbing
landscape and a major worry for health care workers.

In New York, the drug, which gives its users a seductive rush of
power, confidence and energy that can last for days, is still mostly
confined to gay men. But law enforcement officials and drug abuse
counselors fear that it could follow in the footsteps of Ecstasy and
cocaine, widely used party drugs that gained cachet among gay club-
hoppers but later spread well beyond their world.

"If it took off, it would be a disaster," said Bridget G. Brennan,
special narcotics prosecutor in New York. "We are watching it very
closely."

Prized as aphrodisiac and long-lasting stimulant, methamphetamine can
be snorted, inhaled, swallowed or injected. Many experts say it is
more addictive and toxic than heroin, crack or cocaine. It is also
alluringly inexpensive: just one lung full of smoke, the equivalent of
a few dollars' worth, can spark a night of euphoria.

But one toke, most users discover quickly, is never enough. "The first
time I tried crystal I knew I was in love," said Eric Martin, 50, a
behavioral researcher from Queens who injected crystal for several
years but is now sober. "The second time I tried it, I knew I was in
trouble. Wicked is the only word I can think of to describe it."

The drug is particularly popular as an energy jolt for club-goers who
sometimes spend 10 hours on the dance floor. But what begins as a
recreational pursuit can rapidly become all-consuming. Jobs, friends
and lovers fall by the wayside. H.I.V.-positive men neglect
life-sustaining drug regimens. Food, sleep and safe-sex practices
become distractions. Over time, insomnia can lead to hallucinations
and, with regular use, a psychotic state that mental health experts
say is indistinguishable from paranoid schizophrenia.

There are no official statistics gauging the drug's spread in New
York, but one telling measure can be found in a classroom at an old
school in Greenwich Village. Three years ago, when Mr. Martin started
the city's first Crystal Meth Anonymous meeting, at the Lesbian and
Gay Community Service Center on West 13th Street, it had three regular
attendees. Now there are four meetings around the city every week,
each drawing 30 to 50 people.

"It was just a matter of time before it arrived here," said Michael P.
Dentato, executive director of Body Positive, an organization that
serves people infected with H.I.V. "Now we're on the cusp of an epidemic."

Two weeks ago, more than 100 health care providers, researchers and
drug counselors gathered at New York University for a conference to
try to assess the drug's prevalence here. A recent study by the Center
for H.I.V./AIDS Educational Studies and Training found that more than
half of gay men in New York who admitted using alcohol or drugs had
tried crystal meth in the previous year. By comparison, a 1998 survey
conducted at bars and clubs by the center found that 10 percent of gay
men said they had tried it.

Dr. Perry N. Halkitis, a New York University psychologist who authored
both studies, said he believed that crystal meth would continue to
spread unless public health officials and gay leaders started
publicizing the drug's destructive side. "There's no one out there
warning people about crystal," he said. "At the moment, it is still
considered chic."

Also known as crank, ice, speed or blue-collar cocaine,
methamphetamines have been popular since the 1960's, when bikers and
truckers in the West used the drug to stay awake. Easy to produce and
cheaper than most narcotics, it gained wider appeal in the 1980's and
1990's, first with working-class men in the rural heartland and later,
with well-heeled gays in San Francisco and Los Angeles.

These days, the drug is made in clandestine labs in Mexico and
California, or on isolated farms in states like Missouri or Iowa.
Recipes are on the Internet; essential ingredients like anhydrous
ammonia and red phosphorus are available at farm-supply stores.

According to law enforcement officials, crystal meth is sold in the
New York area by a handful of gay men who buy it from friends on the
West Coast, with much of it arriving by express mail. For now, they
say, it is a low-key enterprise supplying people who largely know one
another. Investigators have made a few arrests, though seizures have
been relatively small.

A more complex and powerful descendant of amphetamine, methamphetamine
swamps the brain with dopamine, a chemical that regulates pleasure,
motivation, attention and movement. Those who have sampled the flaky
off-white substance describe a high both subtle and irresistibly
empowering. Self-confidence soars, melancholy is banished, and users
say they feel invincible. Sexual desire is also heightened to extreme
levels, many gay men say, leading to behavior that is both excessive
and dangerous.

"It makes any situation more pleasant, and gives you incredible
stamina and energy," said Rick Whitaker, 33, a writer who details his
addiction in an autobiography, "Assuming the Position." Unlike other
drugs, he and others say, it can be integrated into daily life, at
least in the beginning. Productivity improves. Even housework is
enjoyable. With the appetite suppressed, losing weight is effortless.
The shy and awkward suddenly feel charming.

"It's the perfect drug for a gay man in New York," said John, a 45-
year-old publishing executive, who declined to give his last name, and
who started a 12-step meeting in his apartment in 1998 when few had
even heard of the drug. "It makes you feel brave, powerful, and for
people dealing with H.I.V., it helps you overcome your fears."

But after the high comes the crash. Mr. Whitaker recalled running out
of crystal after a 36-hour drug marathon and contemplating suicide.

Researchers say there are other dangers, too. Because a user's blood
pressure is elevated for up to 72 hours, the risk of small-scale
strokes or heart attacks increases tenfold. The drug is also extremely
toxic to the brain. Dr. Nora Volkow, a psychiatrist at Brookhaven
National Laboratory, has found brain damage among frequent users that
resembles an early stage of Parkinson's disease. Although some
recovery occurs with abstinence, many of the subjects in her study had
impaired verbal and motor skills and degradation to areas of the brain
associated with feelings of euphoria. "People are taking it to feel
good but they're actually destroying their ability to feel pleasure,"
she said. "It's like selling your soul to the devil."

Public health officials say the drug is particularly dangerous for
H.I.V.- positive men, who often begin ignoring their complex schedule
of medications. Dr. Antonio E. Urbina, an internist at St. Vincent's
Manhattan Hospital, said missing even a few doses can open the door to
increased viral replication and even mutations that resist the
existing AIDS drugs. He and other medical professionals say they fear
that the drug will help spawn these so-called super viruses and, over
time, encourage their spread to others high on crystal.

Eric Martin and other meth users say they expect their meetings to
grow more crowded. More than 40 people, showed up for the meeting last
Tuesday night, "Suicide Tuesday," as Mr. Martin calls it, the day when
a weekend of partying comes to a crashing end.

After John gave an account of his destructive dance with crystal, a
dozen other men, identified by first names only, took turns announcing
their tentative triumphs. Then Craig raised his hand. Jittery and
gaunt, he described a weekend lost in drugs and unsafe sex. The worst
part, he said, was lying to his mother. "I feel like I'm trapped in a
downward spiral and I don't know how to get out," he said.

Many of the men winced. Others looked at their feet. Everyone seemed
to understand what he was going through, but in the end, there was
nothing anyone could say.