FORMER DRUG ADDICT SAYS SHE NOW WANTS TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE

During her college years in Louisiana, Jackie Rogers (not her real
name) was introduced to drugs.

At 21, Rogers had never been a problem for her parents. In high
school, she did not drink, did not smoke. She did not even miss
curfew, but the freedom of college brought new challenges for her. At
a club one night, someone slipped Ecstasy into her glass of water.
That one drug use started a trend of using and then abusing drugs.

"A friend of mine, and I use the term friend very loosely, came to me
at a club one night and offered to get me a drink," Rogers said. "She
went and got me some water, and it took a while. I didn't think
anything about that. She came back, gave me the water and was hovering
over me. She kept saying how do you feel? ... About 10 minutes later,
my whole world just came out from under me."

It was that one night that began an addiction that gripped her life
for the next 10 years. She did every drug: cocaine, Ecstasy, LSD, meth
and more.

But Rogers' is not a story of addiction, but of recovery -- a story of
five years clean and a lifetime ahead.

"I really believe that God has such a plan for my life -- that I'm
going to make such a difference when it comes to drug addiction -- He
just couldn't let me die. I really and truly am going to make a
difference. I know I am," Rogers said of her life after recovery.

She recalled that one night in the throes of her addiction as she was
lying on her bathroom floor, she committed to getting out of drugs and
helping others do the same. Recovery did not come that night, but when
she did get out of the life of drugs, she did not forget that commitment.

Now in her 30s, Rogers is a secretary at a local business and a
full-time student working toward a degree in sociology with a minor in
psychology. She has plans for a master's and then a doctorate. Her
husband works as a delivery driver for a local business. Their
7-year-old son is a first grader."I am a full-time mommy, a full-time
student, a full-time employee, and I have a full-time life," she said.

In 1997, she and her husband decided to quit the life of drugs and
move to Arkadelphia to escape it all. It was not easy. It was not a
"Cinderella story" of living happily ever after. It was weeks of
detox, and every day making the decision to live that day drug free.

"I had to fight to get where I am, and I have to fight every day to
stay clean. There's no Cinderella to it," Rogers said.

The decision to leave Louisiana and the life of drugs was not based on
one single experience but on a number of things. Friends, the few who
were not addicts, tried to reach her. Rogers also realized that her
son, then 3, was growing up, and she had already missed important
parts of his life. At that same time, police were closing in. She was
convinced that she would lose her son, soon, and that she or her
husband would be arrested. She also remembered the words of a Cajun
judge warning a teen who had appeared before him several times.

"The judge leaned over and said, 'Son, don't you get it. If you don't
change your playground, your play toys and your playmates, you ain't
never going to get clean.' And that just hit me. I knew I had to get
out of there."

And she did get out. She and her husband and son left their home in
Louisiana to come back to Arkadelphia. She had lived here previously
and graduated from Arkadelphia High School. It was her parents' job
transfer that took her to Louisiana. Her parents had long since
returned to Arkansas.

When the family moved back to Arkadelphia, Rogers and her husband got
into Narcotics Anonymous. It was there that she had a real
breakthrough in dealing with her addiction.

"All of a sudden I realized that I wasn't a bad person. I was sick. I
have a disease that there is no known cure for. It's the same as AIDS.
It's the same as cancer," Rogers said. "If you don't get help, you
will die."

She compares the stigmatism of drug addiction with AIDS. In the 1980s
and early 90s, having AIDS labeled a person as socially unacceptable;
but now, stars, politicians and even average people champion research
and treatment for AIDS. It is that same change in perspective that
needs to happen with drug addicts.

"If somebody came up to me and said, 'I am a drug addict, and I don't
know what to do.' I know what to do to help. I know how to be
compassionate toward them, but most people would be like, 'I don't
want to have anything else to do with you.'"

Rogers believes that any drug addict can recover, but the conventional
means of reaching those in the drug culture are ineffective.

"They say we're fighting a war on drugs. No, we're not. We're chasing
our tails," she said.

Drug addicts are not criminals. They are sick, she said. In her
perspective, jail is not the answer for a person like herself, who did
not deal the drugs, but only used them herself. Recovery and
rehabilitation rarely come in jail or prison because it is mandated.
An addict recovers when he or she realizes his own need to be free of
drugs.

Winning the war on drugs is "simple economics." Cure the demand for
drugs, and there will be no more supply of drugs available. Curing the
demand is what is difficult, but Rogers feels that more progress can
be made with improved education and awareness. She supports
preventative education for students to slow the number of people
becoming addicted to drugs. She wants to see the general public become
more aware of the challenges that face an addict in recovery.

"I was afraid to tell anybody I was an addict," Rogers said. "You're
afraid of the rejection. You're afraid of that reaction. You're afraid
of all of these things."

It's important for recovery that an addict knows of people and places
where he or she can find help rather than condemnation.

"What causes many addicts to relapse, I think, is the fact that life
is tough. It really is," she said. "All of a sudden, you have to deal
with life, and you've made such a mess, such a huge mess. You haven't
paid your bills. You haven't taken care of your children. You haven't
been a good son or daughter. And you've got so many fences to mend
that it's just overwhelming when you get clean."

To family and friends who want to help an addict, Rogers says do not
give up and always leave the offer of support and help open for when
the addict is ready to take it.

"You know what really got me through this? I had a praying momma and a
praying mother-in-law, and they were not going to give up. I'll tell
any addict out there, if you've got a praying momma, you better just
go on into recovery because it's going to come. And Mommas, don't quit
praying."

To the addict, Rogers says that recovery is there for him or her to
claim. It can be a simple outpatient program or a long-term term
facility, but it is the addict's decision to make.

"Any addict can quit. Narcotics Anonymous is free. It doesn't cost
anything to go and sit at that table and listen. It is a 12-step
program, and it really does work. When you realize that your life has
become unmanageable and you no longer have control, that's the first
step."

Even five years after beginning her recovery, Rogers admits that the
process is on-going. There will never be the point where she or any
addict can say, "I have recovered," in the past tense. It is always
that they are in recovery -- in the present tense.

But it's not a daily battle to stay clean anymore, Rogers said. She
does not think about drugs every day now. The thought of drugs only
comes to her once or twice a month.

"I have to always know that I have that ability to lapse at any given
moment," she said.

After sitting in Narcotics Anonymous groups, Rogers said she knows
that drugs are in Arkadelphia, but she proudly said that she would not
know where to start if she wanted some.

Though she may talk about her impact in drug recovery programs coming
in the future once she has completed her degrees, at least one
professor sees her impact already. Dr. Herman Gibson, chair of the
sociology and human services department at Henderson, often invites
Rogers to speak in his classes including freshman orientation
seminars, deviant behavior courses and health classes.

For the freshmen, she explains "what can happen if you're not sort of
vigilant and do not exercise self control," Gibson said. For others,
Gibson said that she opens their eyes to what addiction really means.
Students have realized they were alcoholics or even drug addicts and
have begun to seek help after hearing Rogers speak.

"I'd venture to say she's one of the rare survivors of what's
happened. Most people that reach the depth of her addiction cannot
break free," he said. "It's a testament to her strength and fortitude
that she got out. She is a very fine example for people."

While Rogers could tell the story of the underlying drug culture that
exists in any town, of desperation that comes with addiction, of the
extremes of a life of addiction, it is recovery that she chooses to
focus on both for herself and for others like her.

"There is help," Rogers said. "My addiction -- as far as I'm
concerned, that was 10 years, and it has a beginning, and it has an
ending, but my recovery is going to go on for much longer."