A VAPOROUS MUSE?

Montreal -- Re Britain To Let Pot Smokers Off Lightly (July 11):

Cruel jokes at innocents' expense should never be condoned,

But I can't stop wondering how "the Queen" would act, if stoned.

She might misplace her gloves while she and Phil were "getting down,"

Or whimsically let poor Camilla wear the family crown.

Her "munchies" unappeased by small sandwiches of cucumbers,

Replaced with bags of tangy chips in monumental numbers.

The formal dinners held each day would loosen up and mellow,

Till Liz herself would show off stupid dog tricks done with Jell-O.

The palace, now a lively place till wee hours of the morning,

But neighbours know, if they complain, she'll get off with a warning.

Long-held dispute with Fergie's at an end, she's now quite smitten,

To think -- all this, because drug laws are easing up in Britain.

The Queen wears her hair long now, she and hubbie often kiss.

Thanks to the Class C downgrade of hashish and cannabis.

Since we're all loyal colonists, let's wave a magic wand,

And quickly follow suit with "motherland," across the pond.