'I GOT A SECOND CHANCE AT LIFE'

Tracy R. began to live the day she almost died.

A near-fatal heroin overdose last year put her on the road to recovery.

"It's a new life, a second life," Tracy said. "I got a second chance on
life, so I better do good this time because I don't know about the next
time. I might not be so lucky."

Tracy, 22, said she was unconscious for several minutes after shooting
heroin June 22, 2001, in a mobile home at a Fayette County trailer park.

"It killed me. A bag and a half killed me. I died. I stopped breathing. My
respiratory system shut down," she said.

The two people who were with her in the trailer left her for dead. But a
boy walking outside the open trailer door saw Tracy lying on the floor and
ran next door to where an emergency medical technician lived.

"Thank God there was an EMT. She revived me," Tracy said.

She remembers waking up briefly in the trailer and then in a Westmoreland
County hospital.

Since then, Tracy said she is determined not to become another victim of
heroin. Deputy coroners said the drug has been a factor in the deaths of
more than 50 people in Allegheny and Westmoreland counties this year.

Heroin is derived from morphine. It is a "downer" that affects the brain's
pleasure system and interferes with the brain's ability to perceive pain,
according to the U.S. Drug Enforcement Agency.

Tracy, a high school dropout who lives in a Greensburg apartment with her
mother, is seeing a drug addiction therapist and attending Narcotics
Anonymous meetings. She hasn't used heroin since her near-death experience,
but admits to slipping about five months ago and smoking marijuana.

Tracy, who agreed to share her experiences if her real name wasn't printed,
began using marijuana when she was 14 or 15. At the time, she was living in
another section of Westmoreland County.

"I guess I got around the wrong bunch of people," Tracy said. "I guess I
thought I belonged to that group of people and thought it was the cool
thing to do. If you didn't get high, I guess you were a loser back then. I
don't know. That's what I thought. Getting high was the thing to do, or so
I thought."

At 18, she began using cocaine and crack cocaine. About two years ago, she
stopped living with her mother after an argument.

"I just wasn't trying to hear what she was trying to say," Tracy said. "And
I thought it was my way or the highway. It either was going to be what I
wanted and how I wanted it, or that's it, I'm not doing it.

"I had a really bad attitude about life: I hated it, and I didn't think it
was worth it. And I ended up living with these people that got kicked out
of a trailer."

Needing a new place to stay, she moved in with a heroin user.

"I used to sit and watch him get high on heroin and say, 'Oh no, I'll never
do that, I'll never do that.' But sure enough, I was up for like five days
in a row -- and I couldn't sleep -- and they said, 'Here, snort a line of
heroin.' And it went from snorting it to shooting it until I overdosed. (#201)

"I've been clean, off of crack and heroin, for a year and a month," Tracy said.

She snorted heroin for about three months, then started shooting it to get
high faster. Her near-death experience occurred the fourth time she
injected the drug, Tracy said.

She doesn't believe she would have started on heroin if she'd had to shoot
the drug at first.

Doctors and drug therapists said the fact that new users can snort heroin
is partly responsible for the alarming jump in the drug's use in western
Pennsylvania and the United States. Federal health officials estimate that
between 600,000 and 1 million Americans use heroin.

David McAdoo, executive director of the Fayette County Drug and Alcohol
Commission, said people find snorting heroin less objectionable than
injecting the drug. But either way, it's harmful, he said.

'Silent Introduction'

"It's just as addictive because you're still getting it into your body,"
McAdoo said. "(Snorting) also is, for a lot of people, a silent introduction."

Patti Young, a therapist with the Drug and Alcohol Services program
operated by Westmoreland Regional Hospital in Greensburg, agreed.

"Younger people are looking at it as, 'I'm snorting heroin, and it's not as
bad as injecting it,'" she said. "So there might be the fallacy that
snorting it is not going to affect me as much as if I injected it. And they
don't realize that a lot of times, they start out snorting it and then
injecting it (later) to feel high" sooner.

There are other reasons for heroin's current prominence. Its price is down,
while the street costs for drugs such as the pain-killer OxyContin are up.
Heroin also is available, and it's highly addictive.

Some patients have told Young they used heroin because they were curious
about the drug. They never expected to get hooked.

"I don't know too many people who go into this saying, 'I think I'll become
a heroin addict,'" Young said.

Still others turned to heroin after repeated use of another drug made them
develop a tolerance. "The solution is to use another chemical to (#201) get
higher," she said.

Heroin addiction can involve a person of any age, career or income group.

"I think it's safe to say addictions don't really discriminate," Young said.

Tracy blamed her drug use on depression and a feeling that her life was out
of control. And there were other explanations, reasons she said she
couldn't even begin to express.

Tracy is an addict, a fact her treatment program requires her to
acknowledge. She's not a reformed drug addict; she's forever a recovering user.

Young said both a user's and society's understanding of addiction are
important in drug treatment. "I think it's taken society a long time to
grasp the idea that, 'Yes, this is a true disease,'" she said.

A therapist for both adults and adolescents for 13 years, Young counsels as
part of an "intensive outpatient" program that involves three-hour classes
three times a week. In that program, she helps clients to understand
themselves better and to interact with others in group therapy, all aimed
at staying off drugs. Heroin users also may be treated in an inpatient
facility, so-called "detox."

Admitting A Problem

Users in the outpatient program must begin by admitting they have a
problem, Young said.

"You have to keep in mind, denial is the core component of addiction," she
said. "Part of the job of the intensive outpatient program is to work
through that denial (#201) and help them to get a better picture of what's
going on in their lives."

Young strongly encourages that patients attend Alcoholics Anonymous or
Narcotics Anonymous meetings.

"They need that support in addition to the treatment. It's very tough for
addicts to only have abstinence without all the other elements that are
involved in treatment. Treatment and support, they go hand in hand," she said.

Both Alcoholic Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous offer a 12-step program
that includes getting participants to engage in self-examination. A central
theme is an emphasis on a "spiritual awakening."

Tracy said her awakening involves God as a help, hope and inspiration.

"(The 12-step program) helps you see things in a different way, one you
never thought you could," she said.

Tracy also tries to stay away from people who use drugs or have "negative
attitudes."

Young said getting off heroin is difficult.

"I think it takes a person who has a lot of motivation, a lot of commitment
and the understanding that if I continue to do this, I'm going to die. That
has to be very real to them," the therapist said.

For Tracy, the memory of her near-death experience is a motivating factor.

"It has turned my life around a whole lot," she said. "It made me realize
there's a lot more to life than sitting around, getting high and being
stupid all the time."

Tracy hopes to receive her high-school equivalency diploma this month, then
go to a community college to become a nurse.

"Whoever thought I'd be going back to school? Not me, because I hated
school. And I mean I've got a car. And with my addiction, I never could
save up money for a car, because I was too busy finding ... my next fix,"
she said.

And she believes she will never use heroin or other illegal drugs again.

"Why mess it up?" Tracy said. "I've got so much going for me right now. I
ain't going to throw it away for nothing."

(SIDEBAR)

Early Warning

Some early warning signs of possible drug use by children:

Change in personality, circle of friends, hygiene, physical appearance or
clothing style.

Change in financial status or abrupt change in social hours and sleep patterns.

Change in vocabulary, with use of drug slang or terminology.

Defensive attitude about bedroom or certain items or areas in the room.

Source: "First Response Guide to Street Drugs."