PROPOSAL CAN PREVENT UNIVERSITY BUDGET CUTS

This is "A Modest Proposal" for preventing the state budget cuts from being
a burden on the students and the University, and for making them beneficial
in the future.

A dismal mood pervades the University, as 400-person lectures are dismissed
prematurely due to malfunctioning audio-visual equipment. Students cram
into overcrowded buses, only to be late to class anyway and the bathrooms
are out of order, yet again. A 14 percent budget cut, at an institution
that was under funded to begin with, stifles any hope that the situation
will be improved in the near future.

In his letter to the students, the President of the University, asked, "How
will New Jersey remain in the forefront of the innovation economy?" I have
given this matter, and the problems of the University much thought, having
devoted many recitation hours to the fruitful contemplation of the matter.
The University must take the situation into its own hands, and solve its
own financial problems, by employing the use of its greatest resource: the
students of Rutgers. In a place where students often forsake required
reading for other pursuits, it will be a considerable challenge to get them
to work for the greater good of the University. Therefore, the solution
lies in making a profit on an activity many students engage in anyway.

A 1995 survey of the New Jersey Family Policy Council states that 37.5
percent of persons aged 18 to 21 have tried marijuana at least three times,
and it is safe to assume this is a low bias number for current university
usage. With over 48,000 students on all of the Rutgers campuses, this is a
projected market of at least 18,000 students within the University alone!
Now if the University could offer legal protection to those students
willing to sell marijuana or other illicit substances commonly consumed by
students in return for a cut of the profits, it would make major headway in
surmounting the gap caused by this year's budget cuts. With proper
implementation, such permits will be in higher demand than those for
parking by the end of the semester.

I realize that this plan is a little bit controversial, but one must really
consider it in light of the alternatives. The University must utilize any
means possible in order to increase internal revenue; it simply cannot
afford to do otherwise. With its three campuses, Rutgers has the potential
to reach out to a large and geographically varied market. With its
reputation for diversity, Rutgers students will be able penetrate the many
different segments of the market. With its reputation for excellence in
higher education, Rutgers students will have a competitive advantage over
sellers who are also working towards their degrees.

The program would attract a lot of attention to Rutgers, and as the cliche
states, there is no bad publicity. This program would provide a greater
public profile for the University, and students would be proud of their
unique role in such a turn around. Although some may complain about the
reduction of morals to increase morale, there is no need for worry. As has
been previously mentioned, students would engage in such activities anyway.
With this new plan, the school would be involved on behalf of the students,
and could protect them, from an unfortunate early career termination at the
hands of the state police. With proper implementation, we may even be able
to increase the total University budget and begin to remedy the plethora of
preexisting problems.

I dare the State Legislators, whom may disapprove of this proposal, to
develop a viable alternative, one that is as creative, and revolutionary,
to give New Jersey public higher education the funding it deserves. Until
then, I merely offer this modest proposal.