DRUGS, KIDS AND PARENTS

You can get just about any drug you want at school - mostly marijuana,
cocaine and speed.

That admission from an Earl Marriott student came as parents filed into a
forum called "Partners in Parenting: Myth versus Reality" Tuesday evening.

The forum is one of many to be scheduled throughout Surrey to help parents
build relationships with their kids, schools and the community.

The girl, who didn't want her name used, freely admitted using pot, but
hadn't ventured into more serious drugs. She attributes her caution to
values instilled by her family.

Most kids her age don't want to be lectured, she said, they want to see
real accounts such as "Through the Blue Lens," a gritty documentary of
street life on Vancouver's Downtown Eastside.

That was a point raised by Surrey's manager of safe schools Theresa
Campbell, a keynote speaker at the forum.

"They want reality-based education," said Campbell, also a member of
Surrey's Drug Crime Task Force.

The forum was prompted in part by a recent survey that shows increasing
drug use among Surrey children.

A November 2002 report by Pacific Community Resources indicates that more
than 80 per cent of Surrey youth can get marijuana in 24 hours, while about
half can get speed, cocaine or Ecstasy within a day.

Coun. Dianne Watts, chair of the city's Drug Crime Task Force said parents
need to come to grips with the harsh reality.

"Their kids are being targeted by drug dealers, they need to know that,"
said Watts, also a panelist at the forum.

"I've heard it from students, time and time again, they're being offered
drugs on a daily basis."

Parents need the skills to help children avoid the pitfalls.

Panelist Rick Fabbro, principal of Elgin Park Secondary, said it's "vital"
to build relationships with children.

Make sure they know they have choices, and help them make the right ones,
Fabbro said.

The first half of the forum addressed issues specific to elementary
school-aged children. Questions from the audience included what recreation
facilities could be offered to keep kids busy, and whether a mentoring
program could be considered.

The tone from the first group was inquisitive, whereas the parents of
secondary school-aged students voiced a heightened state of concern,
pressing for answers to specific questions about their often rebellious teens.

"How do we encourage them to make the right choice?" one person inquired.

"How do we punish them when we find they're using drugs?" a man asked.

To the last question, Stephanie, a panelist and outreach worker from
Reconnect, advised the man to follow through with the normal course of
punishment in one's home.

"Don't 'consequence' the heck out of the situation and not talk about it,"
she advised.

Fabbro advised parents to go for a long walk or to the gym after finding
out their kids have used drugs, to ensure they wind down before dealing
with it.

Overreaction can be counterproductive.

"Parents need to be Columbo," Fabbro said, referring to the TV detective.
"Ask questions that show the flaw in their stories."

After the meeting, Mark, a parent of two boys, was disheartened that he
hadn't heard more answers to the challenges facing kids and their parents.

Both of Mark's sons have tried marijuana, and he'd like to see negative
influences such as rowdy youth and dealers removed from schools. He
acknowledged that with sparse police resources, the solution will be
family-based.

"We have to look at what we are as parents," Mark said, adding that young
people are out late into the night. "These are good kids, why aren't their
parents aware of what the kids are doing?"

Const. Mark Searle, Community Liaison Officer for the South Surrey
district, brought one of the few laughs of the night when he offered the
crowd an optimistic irony.

"You've created a safe community here, that's why you've got 14-year-olds
out at two in the morning," Searle said. "Go to one of these other areas,
they'll last about two minutes."

Future forums will be scheduled for each of Surrey's other five
communities, although dates have not yet been set.

Schools will notify parents of upcoming forums. Anyone who feels their
child may be involved with drugs or needs more information on how to keep
their kids away from narcotics, can call Pacific Community Resources at
604-951-4853.