ED'S NOT HERE, MAN

The jury is in. Oh, wait! There will be no jury. Police in Michigan
have decided not to press charges after one of their own, former Cpl.
Edward Sanchez, took some marijuana from a drug bust and used it to
make pot brownies. After eating the brownies, Sanchez and his wife
had a little freak-out and called 911, believing that they were "overdosing."

"I think we're dying," Sanchez pleaded during the five-minute phone
call. "We made brownies, and I think we're dead. I really do."

We all know that stealing confiscated drugs is illegal enough to
merit some serious charges, but shouldn't there be some extra
stupidity misdemeanor thrown in there? Overdosing on weed is about as
likely as eating only one Oreo after a couple joints, and that is
something any person in charge of confiscating illegal substances
should know. Even the THC-infused city of Boulder pressed charges on
City Councilman Richard Polk for a marijuana mishap, and his trip
didn't involve a paranoid death delusion. Then again Polk did tell
police that the stuff in his pocket wasn't good shit.

Maybe we're missing out here in Boulder. It might be time to try
trading that quarter of Boulder Skunk for a dime bag of the Michigan
Death Doobie.