THE DRUG WAR'S FUN AND GAMES

WEEDING OUT THE TRUTH

Who's Got The Straight Dope On Drugs?

We're at war, people, and it's the longest war we've ever waged declared in
1972 by "Tricky" Dick Nixon. It's cost billions of dollars and divided a
nation. It's filled prisons, making incarceration a boom industry. (I know,
I know: Everybody needs to make a buck.) It's also produced reams of
propaganda … and it's been a bigger failure than our misguided foray into
Vietnam.

It's the war on drugs, a war waged with words like "just say no" and
messages like the memorable frying egg TV commercial: "This is your brain
on drugs." Mmm. Can I have some bacon with that?

No, I can't.

A funny thing happened a couple weeks ago. On the very same day, two items
crossed my desk. One was a deck of playing cards about the dangers of
drugs: "Marijuana Dangers addiction, destroys brain cells, releases
inhibitions, impairs short-term memory and judgment." The other was a book
called "Saying Yes: In Defense of Drug Use."

Hmm. Interesting, I thought. The anti-drug camp is delivering its message
with drawings of cartoon skeletons and short messages delivered on playing
cards. The pro-drug camp is delivering its message in a book … a real book
without pictures (not counting that Bob Marley-size joint on the book
jacket). What did this mean, I wondered? Is the anti-drug crowd assuming
drug users are unable to accept a thorough and thoughtful message and are
best communicated with via cartoons and playing cards? Or have both sides
misread the other?

Clearly, in "Saying Yes" we learn that pro-druggies can read and write
books. Are we to assume that playing cards are the best the anti-drug crowd
can muster intellectually? Or am I reading too much into this? Were these
two items appearing simultaneously on my desk merely a serendipitous
accident? Are there plenty of books out there against drugs?

I put "books against drugs" into Google and hit the search button. 845,004
hits, the first one being from the Drug & Herb Center offering "Detailed
information on medicine and medicinal herb from WebMD." Let's try this
again. "Books against illegal drugs" elicited 229,004 hits, so maybe my
theory of the anti-drug crowd assuming the drug-crowd is a bunch of
illiterate ne'er-do-wells incapable of sustained thought is erroneous. Or
maybe those anti-drug books, like the pro-drug "Saying Yes," seem like a
whole lot of preaching to the choir rather than the sort of arguments that
actually convince the opposition.

Most drug users are successful people doing just fine in life, thank you.
The book also talks about the lies and propaganda of anti-drug crusaders,
especially about what it terms "voodoo pharmacology" the idea that drugs
make people do evil things (think "Reefer Madness," the hilarious 1938
propaganda film filled with venal drug users engaged in lurid behavior,
which ironically is now a popular cult favorite among drug users).

Will this "Saying Yes" book convince William Bennett that we should
legalize drugs? Hardly. Certainly no more than an anti-drug book would
convince someone who works two jobs, pays his mortgage and taxes, and
enjoys smoking dope that his "habit" is destroying the fabric of America.
Which reminds me, wasn't the first American flag made of hemp? I digress.

My other theory is that the "Death on Drugs" playing cards are like
"Reefer Madness" most popular with people who use drugs. They're novelty
items, and I'd guess few people have decided not to experiment with drugs
because they saw a cartoon of a skeleton with a straw up its nose cavity
and a line of text reading, "Cocaine Dangers Highly addictive, miscarriage
or stillbirth, severe depression, seizures, respiratory arrest, cardiac
failure, and death."

Of course, I may be wrong, so I visited the card manufacturer's web site
and read some of the "testimonials":

Dear Life or Death Playing Cards,

About two months ago I was in a store to purchase a pack of cigarettes when
I saw your Death Cigarette Playing Cards. At first I thought this was a
pack of cigarettes, so I picked them up to check them out. The scary
information in this deck shocked the heck out of me. I purchased the pack
of playing cards instead of my pack of smokes and now I keep the deck of
Death Cigarette Playing Cards in my purse in the same spot my smokes used
to be. Now when I go for my smokes, I pull out and read your deck of cards.
I have tried many times over the years to quit smoking without success.
Because of these tobacco education playing cards taking the place of my
smokes, I have kicked this nasty smoking habit and feel great! Thank you so
much for producing such a strong tool to help people to stop smoking. I owe
you much gratitude and maybe my life to your product.

Sincere Best Regards,

Linda Katz Santa Maria, Calif.

Wow! That's beter than hypnotism and the patch combined. I read on …

Dear Life and Death Playing Cards,

Let me tell you a story about a young boy named Timmy. Timmy, at the young
age of 8, was addicted to many severe drugs. When he woke up each morning,
he'd start his day right with a swig from a bottle of scotch he kept under
his bed.

I met Timmy while doing volunteer work at an after school program for
disadvantaged children. I soon took a liking to this youngster who … could
rip bongs with the best of them. But he no longer has need for bong rips,
thanks to your ingenious cards, which were the key to him overcoming his
addiction. After teaching Timmy Texas Hold-em, the game caught on like
wildfire and he was soon betting his lunch.drug money away against the
other children. It is evident that Timmy's drug addiction was subverted by
a severe gambling problem, which has, saved his life.

Sincerely,

Nick Kershbaumer

Health Educator

133 Simmons Hall

University Park, PA 16802

I stopped reading.

The war on drugs wages on, true, but it seems we have reached new levels of
absurdity. Remember the much-ballyhooed but short-lived commercial claiming
that if you smoked marijuana you were supported terrorism?

Drugs users broke out of their self-induced haze long enough to argue two
points: "Hey man, I only smoke Northern California-grown sinsemilla. Like,
Humboldt hasn't become a terrorist-sponsoring state, has it dude? And "Wake
up, America! It's because drugs are illegal that they have to be
manufactured abroad and supported by a vast criminal network. Legalize
drugs and drug users will be supporting the American economy. It's really
the government's misguided prohibition of drugs that's supporting terrorism."

The really bright ones even brought up the Iran-Contra affair and other
American government dealing with regimes funded by drugs. But none of these
arguments seems to make a whit of difference, just like the anti-drug
messages have had no effect in curtailing drug use. Of course, all this
back-and-forth is a good thing. As Joseph Joubert said, "It is better to
debate a point without settling it than to settle a point without debating
it." What seems to be missing among all these playing cards and books and
TV commercials and "just say no" mottos is a solution, but then many of our
most volatile issues have no simple solution. That's where compromise comes
in, and compromise always makes everyone involved unhappy.

Medical marijuana doesn't go far enough for the drug crowd but goes too far
as far as the anti-drug crusaders are concerned. Lax marijuana laws or laws
that allow first-time offenders to seek treatment rather than be
incarcerated upset the hardliners but are still too draconian for
proponents of personal liberties. The real question is: Will we ever find
our way out of this expensive, ineffective quagmire we call the war on
drugs? Maybe, but we'll have a lot fewer novelty cards and books with big
joints on them, and maybe that's the real tragedy, 'cause everybody needs
to earn a buck.

[New Times editor's note]

Glen Starkey rolls up playing cards and smokes them.

[Second Article]

RAISING THE STAKES

Life or Death Playing Cards president and founder Mickey Weedon used to be
a smoker. Back in high school in the early 70's, the now 50-year-old
thought like so many kids today that smoking looked "cool". Then he got a
rude awakening.

"The father of a buddy of mine, a big smoker, started becoming short of
breath, so he went to the doctor," explained Weedon. "The doctor said he
would remove one of his lungs if he thought it would save his life, but
both lungs were bad. I watched a robust 25-pound man shrivel down to a
skeleton and die."

The man smoked a brand called Life Cigarettes whose motto was "Add pleasure
and adventure to your life." Weedon thought the brand name was ironic,
considering the results.

"They should have called them Death Cigarettes, I thought. I quit smoking
and a few years later decided to trademark the name 'Death Cigarettes' and
the motto "Smoke yourself to death."

Weedon held onto the trademark for years, and in 1983 he decided he would
try to manufacture and market the brand. "What happened was I contacted the
large tobacco companies, but they didn't want anything to do with it. In
fact, I was threatened by R.J. Reynolds. I met them for lunch, and when I
pulled out the artwork one guy spewed coffee all over his partner's tie.
They threatened to sue me, so I went to Indonesia and had the product made
over there about 10,000 packs. At the same time, though, all the
information about clove cigarettes burning your lungs came out, and they
were made in Indonesia. I guess the Indonesian government didn't want any
more bad press, so they seized all the product. I lost about 15 grand over
that."

I know what you're thinking. Why is an avowed anti-smoker manufacturing
cigarettes?

"It is kind of hypocritical, and having the cigarettes seized was a good
thing. I eventually ended up selling the rights to the trademark to a guy
in Luxemboug, and he made a lot of money and bailed out before the lawsuits
hit."

The story is actually a bit more involved. Weedon saw on CNN than an
Oregonian named Charles Southwood had manufactured Death Cigarettes,
essentially stealing his trademark. When Weedon confronted him, Southwood's
response, according to Weedon, "was, basically, fuck you. Sue me." That's
when Weedon contacted the fellow from Luxembourg, and with his money sued
and won.

"It was basically a ploy," said Weedon. "He stole the cigarette company
from me."

Weedon, in turn, sued back for the rights to the trademark on the playing
cards, and his company was born, though it didn't immediately take off. He
was selling some retail and trying to get health organizations, schools,
and abuse programs interested.

"These school programs were using the 'just say no' teddy-bear approach,
and all the coffee mugs and T-shirts and crap they'd give the kids at
school just ended up in the trash can in the hallway. I approached the
anti-smoking program with my death deck, and they said, 'Oh, these are
satanic.' Gothic, they called them. I said the cards weren't designed for
parents and teachers but for kids, so I gave them 1,000 decks for free with
the agreement that they give every kid who completed their anti-smoking
program a free deck. So what happened when this 45-minute tobacco class,
which used to have six or seven kids volunteer to attend, jumped up to 50,
60, 70 kids waiting in the hall because they all wanted one of these decks
of cards."

Weedon says he sold about 600,000 decks, and that his newest, "Life Playing
Cards," another anti-smoking deck, is going to make him rich.

"It's going to be way more popular. Maxim did an article last year, and I
was just interviewed by the Wall Street Journal. I don't know if they'll do
anything with it or not."

Weedon, who donates his product to Indian reservations, also plans to
create a Life or Death game board, and he wants to come out with yet
another deck of cards, this time aimed at kindergarteners.

You can buy the cards locally at Games People Play; The Burrito Wagon; Fair
Oaks Pharmacy; various convenience stores and gas stations; and The Sub, a
San Luis Obispo shop that sells drug paraphernalia not a strange as you
may think, since reaching drug users is Weedon's goal. Does he think
they're purchased by drug users as novelty items?

"Definitely they are, but that's a good thing," said Weedon. "I think
[these cards] are making a difference. I get calls form kids who say, 'Hey,
I quit smoking; your cards are great.' They're another tool, another item
in the arsenal that might push people toward quitting drugs."

[sidebar]

MAKE DRUGS, NOT WAR

A New Book Defends Drug Use

There's little doubt that using drugs whether alcohol, tobacco, marijuana,
cocaine, heroin … ad infinitum can have serious health consequences. But
"Saying Yes: In Defense of Drug Use," a new book by Jacob Sullum, argues
that the vilification of some drugs over others is simply a construction of
society rather than an important differentiation between substances.

He notes that drug use is widespread, and that most users lead productive
lives. Sullum also offers a historical account of how drugs became illegal
and why, tracing the roots of the temperance movement, government
propaganda campaigns, and the rise of the counterculture.

The book is a serious scholarly work, replete with exhaustive footnoting,
and it ends by offering a solution of regulated legalization in the final
chapter, "Managing Moderation," suggesting that drug sales to minors would
be prohibited, as would operating a vehicle.

Sullum goes so far as to argue that drug prohibition may be part of the
problem of abuse: "[I]t could be the sort of people who use drugs when
they're illegal are more likely to become addicted, in which case the
percentage of users with drug-related problems might drop if prohibition
were repealed."

He notes that at the beginning of the 20th century when the population of
the United States was 76 million, only 350,000 citizens were cocaine or
opiate addicts: "In other words, at a time when these drugs were legal,
inexpensive, and readily available over the counter or through the mail,
less than 0.5 percent of the population became addicted. Even this figure
may be an exaggeration."

Sullum, always the pragmatist, admits the war on drugs is still defendable
in protection of the small minority of users who do become addicted, but
also notes that prohibition may not be an effective way to prevent people
from developing drug problems.

"The barriers it creates cost, inconvenience, risk of arrest are more
likely to deter casual users," asserts Sullum, who adds that the $40
billion expended annually on the "war" could no doubt be better spent.

[sidebar]

BUY! BUY! BUY!

Say No!

For more information on Death Playing Cards, a local company, visit their
web site (www.deathcards.com) or call 545-9625. More than 400,000 decks of
cards have been sold since 1992. Propietor Mickey Weedon says, "We are also
working on our Game of Life or Death game board and other products for
substance abuse education geared toward youth."

Say Yes!

"Saying Yes: In Defense of Drug Use" by Jacob Sullum is published by
Tarcher/Putnam. The hardcopy retails for $24.95 and is available at most
bookstores or online at www. Penguin.com.

[New Times editor's note]

Nearly everyone I know uses drugs. So why the big stink? Why the hypocrisy
in keeping our love for herb, for example, such a big secret? True, some
drugs are worse than others, destroying lives. In fact, my mother informed
me last weekend that a family member was found dead Saturday from an
overdose. She was 19 and a heroin addict. She'd been clean for three months
and was trying to get on the right track. She'd come from a family dripping
with money and grew up with everything a child could ever want. But
something failed her. And she turned to her own form of painkiller. It's
tragic and horrible, but something tells me there's more to the story than
the simple fact that heroin finished her off. That's the sad and silly
thing about the stupid and long, drawn out "War on Drugs." It's not the
drugs that are the problem. It's the way family life is shaped in the often
foolish American landscape of what is esteemed most: How we look to our
neighbors, the toys we buy for our kids, the money we earn, the time we
spend away from home to pay our mortgages. Shouldn't we put our time and
money back into what we value most: Education, community, a thriving
economy? Isn't it time we put an end to the War on Drugs?

Stacey Warde

Associate editor