METH LURES VICTIMS INTO HELLISH LIFESTYLE

As teenagers are tempted to try methamphetamine, the drug is leaving
them hooked and desperate for more.

Families are left to struggle with the violence and the mood swings.
Melanie Glover talks to a former methamphetamine user about how the
drug affected her life and a grandmother who has been forced to take
custody of her two grandchildren to protect them.

Theresa's body is recovering from the harsh reality of drug
addiction

The petite young woman, whose weight dropped from 60kg to 45kg, is
horrified to think how badly she was affected.

"It was really gross. I always had a body problem. But when I got down
to 45kg I was so embarrassed. I couldn't even go out in public," she
says.

"I had bruises on arms. I couldn't pick things up. It was like my body
was curling up. My body was starting to break down. I thought I was
going to die."

The 22-year-old mother of one has been off methamphetamine for more
than five months and is sharing her story with others in the hope they
too will come off the drug, or better still, never start using it.

Theresa tried P for the first time while she was at a friend's house
celebrating New Year's Eve in 2001.

"I was asked if I wanted a line. They had a lot of it around because
they were involved with dealing it.

"I remember at 4am the next day thinking that I didn't feel tired.
That was followed by a 10-day run of no sleep. I was just having so
much fun."

Theresa says she had reached a stage in her life "where everything was
too much".

She had a three-year-old daughter, was a full time university student
and was working part-time.

"I didn't have much time for socialising," she says.

Theresa, who'd always been anti drugs, started taking P more
often.

"I had to keep on taking it. I just felt so free. Everything was so
enjoyable.

"You get this instant feeling of satisfaction and fulfillment," she
says.

"I never really had a youth because I had my daughter when I was
17."

Theresa promised herself she'd stop taking the drug when university
started again in February.

But she couldn't.

"The addiction fully crept up on me. I never thought it would happen
to me. But it did.

"When the addiction creeps up, only the drugs can make you feel
normal

"I used to find it so hard to get out of bed in the morning. But with
this I had boundless energy."

Theresa's friends manufactured methamphetamine so she usually had
access to free P to snort.

"I thought they were so clever. I used to think they were
gods."

She was shocked to find out how much the drug cost as her need
increased and she was forced to buy it.

She says it wasn't long before she'd spent $20,000 in
savings.

The money included inheritance and hard earned savings and was in the
bank "waiting for important things".

Theresa sometimes took the drug as often as seven times in 24
hours.

Intravenous use soon presented a new range of problems.

Theresa used the same needle three times in a row and succumbed to a
bacteria that made her seriously ill for three days.

The experience put her off needles but not drugs.

She returned to snorting P and still managed to carry on with her
university studies.

Then things got dangerous

"My friend got really aggressive. The friend I thought was the most
level headed was the freakiest one of all," she says.

It wasn't long before she got beaten and had a knife held against
her.

"After one violent incident I went to my parents who called CAT west
(the Crisis Assessment Team). I was taken to hospital and was labelled
psychotic."

"While I was in hospital they found drugs in my car."

Theresa's parents took custody of her daughter and it wasn't long
before she returned to her boyfriend - and drugs.

"It was so easy for the addiction to come back," she
says.

Theresa was beaten another five times by her boyfriend.

"I stayed there. He threatened me. But I really really loved
him."

Police found Theresa injecting the drug while sitting in her
car.

They also discovered forged prescriptions and arrested her on 16
charges.

She spent two weeks in Mt Eden jail on remand.

"By this stage I wanted to get off drugs. I was looking for something
to take away the urge of taking methamphetamine.

"I didn't have any savings left.

"I started thinking about what I wanted from my life."

Theresa, who lost her driver's license after being caught driving
under the influence of drugs, started counselling and despite a couple
of relapses, says she is well on the road to recovery.

"I looked at how my friends lives were falling apart and I though
'nah, I don't want that for my life'.

"My friends were involved in robberies. My friends were beaten in
domestic violence."

She says coming off the drug was hard but worth it.

"I went through hideous periods of depression. Sometimes life felt
like it wasn't worth living for at all.

"I realised how important my daughter is. Methamphetamine took me away
from her.

"I can't see myself ever using it again. Life now is really
good."

Theresa is in her last year of university and is living with her
four-year-old daughter and her parents. She hopes to be living
independently with her daughter by the end of the year.

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FAMILY SHATTERS AS ADDICT PURSUES DRUGS

Two little children at a west Auckland address are waiting for their
mummy to come home.

They could be waiting a while.

The five-year-old and nine-year-old live with their nana Dawn, 47, and
poppa John, 52.

Their mother, Mary, is Dawn and John's 25-year-old daughter - a
methamphetamine addict who has disappeared and only makes contact with
her parents when she needs more money.

Dawn says the children miss their mum.

"They write letters to mummy saying 'We miss you so much. When are you
coming home?'

"But where can I post it?" Dawn says.

The children are coping as well as can be expected.

"But they are burying their own demons as well," Dawn says. "They've
both seen too much already. They've seen the domestic violence.
They've been yelled at and screamed at."

Neither Dawn or John know where Mary is at the moment.

Dawn thought about ringing the police the first time her daughter
disappeared but held off.

"Part of me said it won't be long and they'll be ringing me," she
says. "It's like I'm waiting for the phone call saying she has been
found dead - stabbed, attacked or overdosed."

Dawn says Mary started taking methamphetamine during an 11-month stay
in Christchurch and returned to Auckland a different woman.

"She had lost colossal weight. She was withdrawn and her eyes were
sunken. She went from being a healthy women to being skin and bone. It
was almost like she was anorexic.

"She was very manipulative."

Dawn says problems came to a head a few weeks later when her son
confronted his sister about her drug problem.

"There was a huge row. The next thing I knew she was back in
Christchurch supposedly in rehabilitation."

Mary returned to Auckland in January and seemed settled.

But things turned sour soon after a family holiday in February.

Mary disappeared for two weeks before coming home for three weeks and
vanishing again.

She hasn't been seen since.

Dawn gained interim custody of her grandchildren.

"It's an extremely big step," she says. "I sat down and looked
seriously at what it would involve.

"You have to say to yourself, what is best for the children - for
their safety and well being? Now the children are protected."

Dawn says taking on two children has been a bit of a culture
shock.

"My youngest is 24 and then bang. Now I've got a five-year-old and a
nine-year-old."

Meanwhile she fears for her daughter's well-bering.

"You can't help but wonder where she is. But at the same time you
can't let that be the focus. The focus has to be caring for the kids
and getting on with life," Dawn says.

Dawn says the children have adjusted to a busy routine which enables
her to keep her job while they are at school.

But she is never too far away.

"I think its important they have some stability and know I'm not going
to pack up and leave them," she says.

"They've had too many broken promises and too many let
downs."

The children have even started calling her mum.

"I don't correct them. If that's there comfort zone that's fine. They
don't need to be corrected. They don't realise they are doing it."

Dawn says her daughter's manipulation is hard to deal
with.

"Generally we only hear from her for money. She asks how the kids are
but will never talk to them.

"She needs money to pay her rent and buy her toiletries. She's
hungry.

"Its very difficult not to give her money. As a mother I want to
protect her. But its getting to the point where she is soaking up what
little money we have left over.

"We are not helping her. In fact we are feeding her
habit."

Dawn says Mary has gone to extraordinary lengths to find
cash.

"She's taken my jewellery and sold it. She's taken cheques. Nothing is
sacred. Her mission is to find enough money for the next fix.

"Addicts are so desperate. They are the best thieves, liars and cheats
in the world.

"It's bad enough if someone breaks into your home and takes things
from you. But it's even worse when it's one of your own children."

Dawn says ongoing heartache has taken its toll.

"I have had to disassociate myself from her before she takes me down
with her."

Dawn, who has sought help from Grandparents Raising Grandchildren
Trust, is dubious about what the future holds for her daughter.

"Part of me would like to believe that she would get into detox, get
into rehab, turn right around and become the girl she used to be.

"Part of me says the likelihood of this happening is very
slim.

"I will continue to care for the children, guide them and be there for
them until they are in a position to go back with mum or move on into
the big wide world."

Dawn, who has lost weight through worry, hopes her story helps other
parents and their children.

"If it saves one parent the agony ..."

"Don't sweep it under the carpet. If you suspect for one minute that
one of your children is indulging in drugs, get it seen to," she says.

"Watch for changes in their attitude and appearance. Leave nothing to
chance."

Dawn says the experience has torn her family apart.

"It can be a very lonely time. You can be angry with yourself and the
people that are closest to you. You can push your own family away but
all they were trying to do is help you.

"I would not wish the experience of these last nine months on my worst
enemy."