THIS BUD'S A DUD

Instead Of Getting Ripped On Pot AIDS Sufferer Was Ripped Off

Jim Wakeford calls it a drug deal gone bad.

When the AIDS sufferer popped open the glossy gold, vacuum-packed bag of
federally-grown medicinal marijuana and lit up, he knew he was being set up
for a ripoff.

"I got a bit of a buzzy feeling for a few minutes, then a headache, so I
returned the bunk to the government," says Wakeford, 58, who resides in
Gibsons, B.C.

The dope -- grown under Ottawa's auspices in an abandoned Manitoba
mineshaft -- has garnered dismal reviews from its ailing recipients.

"It's not fit for human consumption ... we've really been given the shaft,"
says Wakeford, no pun intended.

The crusader for medicinal pot is assuming federal officials won't be
busted for receiving the mailed returns.

Given the dubious quality of the dope, it's likely the bloodhounds wouldn't
detect it anyway.

Wakeford was horrified to find a mishmash of twigs, stems, seeds and
low-THC-leafage in his bag of Candope.

It's what pot aficionados derisively refer to as shake, shwag or bunk.

And supplying it isn't exactly proving a victory in the gerbil wheel war
against drugs.

"Now I'm back to the black market," says Wakeford, who claims marijuana
stimulates his appetite and relieves pain.

And he's also looking for a legally-designated grower, but failing that, an
outlaw farmer.

It's one agricultural pursuit that won't need subsidies.

Wakeford, along with fellow activists like Calgary's Grant Krieger, are
convinced the dud bud is an intentional bid to discredit the use of
marijuana for compassionate purposes.

And you can't blame them, given opposition to the concept consistently
voiced by Health Minister Anne McLellan.

"They've set it up to fail," says Krieger.

With the contracted pot grower Prairie Plant Systems of Saskatoon being
paid $5.75 million, it's emerging as another federal boondoggle.

Just call it the federal bong show.

"They could have gotten some really good growers just by letting them off
their jail sentences," says Grant's wife, Marie.

Prairie Plant Systems argues its product should have gone through clinical
trials before being subject to the court-ordered deliveries made last week
to 10 patients.

Funny, but it would seem those the dope is meant for would make for a
pretty credible trial.

But the critics are blaming Ottawa, not their hired hands, for the dumper
crop, arguing the product is finished to federally mongrelized specifications.

What the ill require and expect, say critics, is unadulterated bud, or the
flowering portion of the plant which contains most of the active ingredient.

Wakeford even insists he needs various pure cannabis strains for different
parts of his day.

But don't expect Health Canada's game of rope-a-dope with the chronically
ill to end anytime soon.

For the Kriegers, it just means they'll continue to ship weed to branches
of their foundation set up in six other western Canadian cities.

"If we sent them stuff the government is making, our members wouldn't be
members for long," says Marie.

Multiple sclerosis sufferer Grant doesn't like to go into details of that
effort, fearing it'll antagonize police "who have been pretty good to me
recently."

Even so, he's headed back to court in December to face a trafficking
charge, yet another money-burning boondoggle.

Looking back at the troubled existence of medicinal marijuana in the U.S.,
which was largely aborted by daddy Bush and smothered by his myopic son,
Wakeford insists Canada is following our neighbour's dubious example.

In other words, despite some ballyhooed but superficial policy differences
and much bogus right-wing bleating, Ottawa's still Washington's cowering
little lapdog.

Meanwhile, U.S. trade bullying is capable of stemming the tide of Canadian
pharmaceutical drugs that would benefit Americans' pocketbooks and health
but not the flow of pot.

Back in the world of reality and common sense, Marie Krieger is marvelling
at the wonders worked by her cannabis butter that's infusing a new line of
medicinal Nanaimo-type bars.

Such goodies allow the ill to bypass the side-effects that inevitably come
with smoking anything.

Here's hoping Ottawa doesn't morph into Betty Crocker.