W.W.R.D.?

What would Rush do? As a talk radio host who replies "Damn straight!"
whenever I'm called a "Rush wannabe," I frequently ask myself that
question. Some politico gets caught with his hand in the till (or his
secretary's waistband), a whining special interest group shakes down the
taxpayers for yet another handout, and I wonder as I prepare my radio show,
"What would Rush say about this?"

And that's precisely the question I posed while considering the latest case
of jaw-dropping public hypocrisy: A prominent political spokesman, admired
by millions for his advocacy of the rule of law and personal
responsibility, is caught up in a drug investigation after allegedly buying
thousands of prescription drugs from his housekeeper. Worse, this
self-proclaimed "genius" with millions of dollars at his disposal
apparently sent the housekeeper numerous incriminating emails - how dumb is
that? - and reportedly pulled drug deals in the parking lot of Denny's
instead of doing what every other rich junkie does: finding his own version
of Elvis's Dr. Nick.

Hypocrisy. Arrogance. Glaring stupidity. What would the great Rush Limbaugh
say about this? And would it matter that the person I'm talking about is,
of course, Rush himself?

Many Rush fans give a wholehearted "yes!" to the latter. Dittoheads who
would bludgeon a pill-popping Al Franken or Peter Jennings into a lumpy
liberal paste can't wait for El Rushbo to have his "Jimmy Swaggart" moment
so they can get busy forgiving him. For these abject partisans, consistency
in the condemnation of vice is no virtue.

Principles? The rule of law? They have no time for such picayune concerns.
These conservatives are too busy feeling Rush's pain.

I, on the other hand, can't even think of Rush Limbaugh pulling an Oprah
without experiencing a shudder of nausea. Rush - the Maha Rushie - in full
lip-biting mode, sniffing back tears, and claiming to be a victim of the
poorly-regulated pharmaceutical industry? Please, God, no. What - he's
going to throw in a "The bitch set me up" for good measure? The first
person to roll his eyes at such a transparent spectacle would be Limbaugh
himself.

Rush has spent more than a decade denouncing the easy satisfactions of
self-declared victimhood, and rightly so. The standards he measures by are
individual responsibility and the rule of law. During the White Fluid
Scandal in 1998, he didn't waste time quibbling over President O.J.'s
sophomoric dodges or legalistic evasions about the definition of common
verbs. Rush called it dead on: Character matters and obeying the law
matters even more.

And then he went home and allegedly popped handfuls of happy pills. Ugh.

Desperate Rush supporters sound more than a tad Clintonesque when they
defensively point out that, unlike our perjury-prone president, Limbaugh
hasn't lied about his alleged drug crimes. But this is another feint Rush
would see right through.

Rush Limbaugh's dishonesty is not captured in any "I didn't not take pills
from that woman" statement, but rather his steady stream of attacks against
President Clinton and others for violating the law while doing the same
thing himself. If, as the overwhelming evidence indicates, Rush was
regularly buying drugs illegally, then his every statement of outrage
against lawbreaking by the Clintons, Kennedys, and Co. was inherently false.

And Rush would also be the first to note how damaging such a pattern of
falsehood is over the long run. If the Enquirer discovered that Rush had
once given into the temptations of a buxom blonde groupie while traveling
alone, that would be a mistake. If it were revealed that he had taken a
toke or two off a joint at a Super Bowl party ("Hey, I haven't done this
since I left FM radio!"), that would be a misstep. Stuff happens.

But four years of steady deception is something else. It shows a talent for
and willingness to evade the truth. Could Rush ever trust that person
again? Then how can his listeners?

Most of my fellow Rush fans are ready to give our guy a pass and move on.
They're willing to do Rush a favor and pretend it never happened. I know
that feeling.

But it's not a favor to Rush. It's an insult. Throwing away the
conservative principles of responsibility and justice means forgetting what
Rush stood for the past 10 years. If he truly has helped shape the American
body politic - and I believe he has - how is it a compliment to Rush to
dump his ideals merely to spare his feelings?

I am a conservative because I believe the truth remains true even when it's
inconvenient. I'm a conservative because I believe the rule of law applies
to everyone - no matter how powerful or how partisan. I'm a conservative
because I believe in doing what's right even when it makes me feel bad. And
most of all, I'm a conservative because I'm sick and tired of whiny losers
who make lousy decisions then blame everyone but themselves for the outcome.

I am the conservative I am in no small part thanks to my daily visits with
Rush Limbaugh. And I'm not about to quit now.

Drug criminals deserve to go to jail. Hypocrites lose their right to have
their opinions respected. Serial liars cannot be trusted.

Rush is right . whether he likes it or not.