CALL FOR TREATMENT INSTEAD OF JAIL

Back On The Air After Fessing Up To His Addiction To OxyContin, Limbaugh
Could Be The Voice For Drug Reform

WASHINGTON -- Rush Limbaugh is back on the air after five weeks of drug
rehabilitation, although experts say it could be weeks before Ol' Rushbo
recovers his full sense of self-importance.

His return sermon bombarded listeners with fusillades of what sounded a lot
like humility, evidence that his rehabilitative treatment had broken down
his defenses, cracked through his sense of denial and gotten him in touch
with his feelings, as well as his audience.

It took at least a half hour before his voice could de-mellow enough to
take a New-Age-sounding shot at "lib-brools":

". . . The attempt to manipulate lib-brools into changing who they are and
becoming nice guys, and liking us is always going to fail because it's not
our job to make them like us," he opined. "It's their job to like
themselves. And the problem with lib-brools is, they don't like themselves
. . . They're denying who they really are."

Heavy, man. Fans may be reassured that Limbaugh understands his fan base.
Detox has only given him a new vocabulary for his old act, which always has
offered therapeutic value to those who yearn to feel good without being
forced to think about things too much.

Conservative talk shows dominate radio chatter these days, partly by the
preaching of an attractively oversimplified view of the world. In that
world, nice, rich guys like Limbaugh are not supposed to be drug abusers on
the sly. Such awful horrors are supposed to be limited to those "other
people," the ones who don't listen to conservative talk shows.

Such were the sentiments of the Old Rush, the Limbaugh who told listeners
in October 1995, that violators of drug laws "ought to be sent up."

Statistics that show blacks go to prison far more often than whites for the
same drug offenses only show that "too many whites are getting away with
drug use," the Old Rush said. His remedy? "Go out and find the ones [white
people] who are getting away with it, convict them and send them up the
river too."

A newer Limbaugh surfaced in March 1998. The New Rush advocated
legalization and regulation of addictive drugs the way we regulate
cigarettes and alcohol. "Make them taxpayers and then sue them," he said of
the drug lords. "Sue them left and right and then get control of the price
and generate tax revenue from it. Raise the price sky-high and fund all
sorts of other wonderful social programs."

Then the New Rush went into an odd radio silence on the subject of drugs,
according to his critics and drug groups who have monitored him. His shift
of views and subsequent silence appeared to coincide with the beginnings of
the Old Rush's now-revealed addiction.

On his return show, he offered that long silence as evidence that he was
not a hypocrite on the subject of locking up drug abusers. "I was honest
with you throughout the whole time," he told his listeners. "I was not as
honest with myself."

Fair enough. Pundits reserve the right to avoid taking positions on
subjects in which they have a conflict of interest.

But now that Limbaugh has come out of the closet as a non-violent drug
abuser, I cannot help but imagine how effective his powerful voice might
sound on behalf of other non-violent drug abusers who could benefit from
treatment instead of incarceration.

This issue transcends political parties. He could make a very good
conservative argument.

"My friends," he might say, "It's time for us to stop wasting our tax
dollars on prison for first-time, non-violent drug offenders.

"I'm talking about people who haven't robbed anybody or held up any liquor
stores or hurt anybody but themselves trying to feed their drug addictions.

"These people could benefit from drug treatment, my friends. Believe me, I
know. Many of you know it, too, my friends.

"And you don't have to be a lib-brool to believe it. In the past few years,
states like Texas, Kansas, Arizona, California and Hawaii have passed law
that mandate treatment instead of incarceration for first-time drug
offenders. Those aren't all lib-brool states, my friends. They're states
with good hard-working taxpayers who want to keep what they earn, not throw
it away on more prisons when rehab can do the job for a lot less money,
pain and heartache.

"This is serious, my friends. We need to stop the madness. Write your
senators and congressmen and governors--especially if you happen to live in
Florida, the state where my own difficulties are still under consideration
by some fine, upstanding officers of the law.

"Florida Gov. Jeb Bush opposed efforts to send first-time abusers to rehab
instead of jail. Please let Gov. Bush know how happy you are that drug
treatment worked so well for his daughter, Noelle, last year.

"Remember, friends, charity begins at home, then spreads to others--like me!"