BLOWING MORE SMOKE AT THE SUPER BOWL

If everything you knew about drugs came from the taxpayer-funded ads on TV,
you might think marijuana is the root cause of teenage sex, manslaughter
and terrorism.

But the great showmen at the Office of National Drug Control Policy and the
Partnership for a Drug-Free America have an even scarier association. New
ads set to debut at the Super Bowl on Sunday reportedly link marijuana to
.. alcohol!

This may be startling to football fans, perhaps even causing some to spill
their drinks. Others may hold their glasses securely, but suddenly long to
tackle a super bowl of their own.

Ostensibly, the ads are designed to urge parental and peer intervention for
teenage drug users, but what's notable is the acknowledgement of alcohol as
a drug. This never would have happened back when Anheuser-Busch was
donating money to the Partnership for a Drug-free America. But the
Partnership apparently experienced a tiny twinge of shame several years ago
and stopped taking money from companies that peddled alcohol and tobacco.
(The twinge was brief enough that the PDFA continues accepting
pharmaceutical money.)

If the beer and liquor companies are bothered by the new ads, they don't
seem to be making a public fuss. It's easy to understand. The feds may have
millions of dollars from you and me to sponsor their depressing little
public service campaign, but it's never going to have the impact of the
spots that sell wine and spirits.

That will be clear to anyone watching the Super Bowl, where funny, sensuous
alcohol ads featuring heroic professional athletes will be the real
attention-getters. And it's clear to researchers who have tested the
anti-drug ads and repeatedly found them ineffective. The images of sex and
pleasure used to entice drinkers will always have more impact than the
PDFA's typically irritating mix of absurd hyperbole and stern paternalism.

Even without the competing messages from a formal industry, the drug
warrior efforts are doomed. There's no marijuana advisory board to offer a
different image of cannabis, but the anti-cannabis ads fail on their
own. Most people find the ads unbelievable for a good reason - they are
based on myths and outright lies. The liquor ads are full of myths and lies
as well, but at least they are fun to watch.

Because marijuana fails to scare by itself, advertisers need additional
scary elements - just like alcohol ads try to succeed by adding sexy
elements that aren't necessarily inherent in the product. So instead of
just hearing about marijuana, we hear about marijuana and guns; marijuana
and teen sex; marijuana and terror. And, now, marijuana and alcohol.

Some may find it frightening; I think most will find it boring. Either way,
I suspect most Super Bowl watchers will respond to the ads by having
another sip of their preferred beverage while waiting for real
entertainment - something more worthy of their time and the money they paid
for it.