WHAT WORKS: TAKE TEEN-AGE SON'S DRUG PROBLEM SERIOUSLY

Q: My 14-year-old was caught smoking marijuana by school authorities. They
suspended him for three weeks and suggested he get professional help from a
drug rehabilitation center. I enrolled my son, and he is on a waiting list.
As a working parent, what should I be doing to help the situation? Can you
help?

A: Determine through medical and/or rehabilitation personnel the extent of
the problem and whether there is an addiction. Through rehab, school or
other community sources, seek counseling for the child. This can be
provided free in some instances. Check school policies regarding academic
services that may be provided for your child during this time. It is
important to keep current with studies and assignments.

Try to determine through your child who has influenced or provided the
drugs and report this to the school and to police.

Monitor your child's activities and friends. Rhonda Hamilton, Mustang, OK

The only way to make sure your son does not continue this behavior is to
schedule urine tests with a clinic to monitor him. I am an eighth-grade
teacher, and from listening to students, this scares them. In addition, it
gives students a cool way out of doing drugs because they have in their
friends eyes a legitimate excuse for saying "no." Other threats such as
grounding do not work.

Once a child gets involved with drugs, his life can go downhill fast, and
it's important to get it under control. S.H., Chesterfield, Mo.

JODIE: Get your priorities straight and focus your time and effort on your
son. Work with school authorities and the drug rehabilitation center and
become active in your son's life. He may not like it, but stay on him like
bees on honey. You may need to take off time from work, and you may have to
use vacation time.

Don't think the rules the center and the school endorse for this type of
situation are silly, even if your teen does. He may plead and promise to
change, but it is your responsibility to follow through with the whole
program. This is not an easy task, and you may feel like giving up. You are
not alone. Find emotional support for you and your husband from other
parents going through the same thing, and take a good look at your personal
life.

If your son continues to hang out with the same group of friends and gets
into his old habits after the program has been completed, you may have to
move your son to another type of school or try a military school.

Self-syndicated columnist Jodie Lynn's latest book is "Mommy- CEO," revised
edition, Martin-Ola Press, $12.95.