ETERNAL HOSTILITY

Call it political chaos theory: Janet Jackson bares a breast during the
halftime show at the Super Bowl, and Howard Stern's radio show gets kicked
off the air in six cities.

In the wake of the Breast Bared 'Round the World, Stern's show is one of
many getting a little more scrutiny nationally and locally, as station
owners cower in fear of the Federal Communication Commission's authority to
fine or revoke broadcast licenses.

It may not happen any time soon: The FCC is still somewhat busy trying to
figure out if the "f-word" can be used as an adjective on broadcast TV.

And if hearing the word isn't bad enough, now we're treated to pictures:
Motorists in some states are being exposed to porn shows playing on the
in-car TV screens of other vehicles. A driver in Schenectady, N.Y., got a
ticket for breezing past a police detective while screening the film
"Chocolate Foam" in his Mercedes-Benz, and at least one mother in Flint,
Mich., had to explain the facts of life to her daughter after she spotted a
porn film playing in another car.

Couldn't have anticipated that one. TV screen, DVD player: Some people are
going to naturally think porn. Lawmakers are contemplating anti-mobile-porn
laws, since they already have laws that prevent you from tinting your
windows dark enough to keep small children from inadvertently sampling your
movie collection.

But wait, there's more: Not only is the government going to tell us what is
acceptable for TV programs and radio shows, it wants to tell us what we can
think, too.

Drug czar John Walters brought his Liarpaloozza 2004 tour to Las Vegas on
Thursday, claiming 60 percent of the 7 million Americans he says need drug
treatment are dependent on marijuana. There's only one thing: It's never
been scientifically proven that marijuana is physically addictive.

But we're getting ahead of ourselves: Walters said that the push to get a
Nevada constitutional amendment on the November ballot that would legalize
up to 1 ounce of marijuana is "not an area for legitimate debate." So just
forget you read that last paragraph.

The last time we had a distant central government telling us what we could
and could not debate, there was a revolution. "I have sworn upon the altar
of God, eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of
man," wrote one of those revolutionaries, Thomas Jefferson. The quote is
engraved in the memorial to him in Washington, D.C., not far from where
Congress regularly engages in every form of tyranny over the mind of man.

But Jefferson also wrote in the Declaration of Independence that governments
derive their just powers from the consent of the governed. So if the people
want to make the speed limit 75 mph, or legalize up to an ounce of
marijuana, they have the right to debate the question, regardless of whether
lying, petty bureaucrats like it or not.

And don't look to Washington to prevent Walters from making war on truth. On
Wednesday, in a letter to Rep. Ron Paul, R-Texas -- who had complained about
anti-legalization lobbying during the 2002 elections -- the General
Accounting Office said it wouldn't be the truth squad.

"However, the Office of National Drug Control Policy is specifically charged
with the responsibility for `taking such actions as necessary to oppose any
attempt to legalize the use' of certain controlled substances such as
marijuana -- a responsibility which logically could include the making of
advocacy statements in opposition to legalization efforts," GAO attorney
Anthony Gamboa wrote to Paul. "The deputy director's statements about
marijuana are thus within the statutory role assigned to ONDCP. Given this
role, we do not see a need to examine the accuracy of the deputy director's
individual statements in detail."

Right. Because so long as the government is telling us what to watch, what
to hear and what to think, what's the value of truth, anyway?