PARENTS NEED TO HEED 'JUST SAY NO'

Just Say No is a popular slogan aimed at discouraging kids from using
harmful drugs and alcohol.

Perhaps it should be directed toward adults, especially parents. If more
adults would just say no to kids I think we'd see fewer youth problems in
our communities.

This was apparent at an event I attended recently.

The family event at a native village was to be drug- and alcohol-free. A few
young adults joined older ones to provide security along with RCMP.

Of course, as soon as there is a rule, someone will try to break it.

One youth was caught bringing in drugs, and a small group was intoxicated.
The chief and the elders stood behind their rule and had the youth removed.

When the youth returned the next day, they were given chores to do. At the
closing ceremony, one young man stood before the crowd and apologized for
his behaviour.

The adults had earlier said no. No drugs, no alcohol, no exceptions and then
followed through to drive the point home to not only the offenders but to
others as well.

We need to take the same approach everywhere. Not every youth is turned
around by a tough-love attitude, but many will respond positively when the
boundaries -- and the consequences for crossing them -- are clear.

If teachers say no to disrespect in the classroom, if coaches say no to
unsportsmanlike conduct, if volunteers say no to rudeness, if parents say no
when kids disobey, young people will start to get the message: certain
behaviour is unacceptable and will not be tolerated. I have had more than a
little experience with kids who have come from permissive homes or abusive
ones. The result is similar -- rebellious, often angry, teens. But when love
and discipline are consistently combined with clear, reasonable guidelines
for behaviour, most kids respond positively over time.

It's not a magic formula and I know it is never easy to raise kids, but if
we really care about our North Island youth we will learn to just say no.