SMOKIN' PSYCHOS

Pot makes people murderous ["Blame Mary Jane," Oct. 7]? It must be this new
strain of killer weed everyone's been talking about. M-16 or whatever. Come
to think of it, as soon as I finish this bag of Doritos, I might go out and
join those red-eyed crazies.

Ever since I got stoned and masturbated in '98, I've had horrendously hairy
palms. This has led to a life of relative isolation in which I've done
little but smoke more pot and play Grand Theft Auto, further propelling my
violent urges. Please note: I also listen to heavy metal music.

I hereby urge all my fellow potheads to maybe get some food and eventually
lift themselves off their couches, go outside and destroy--if, that is,
marijuana hasn't turned you into a chronic psycho killer already.

Bruce Bryson