NEVADA NEWS TOO RIDICULOUS TO BE FICTION

Before the State Rings in the New Year, a Look Back at a Memorable 2004

In our now-annual tradition, we present a look back at 2004. With apologies
to Dave Barry, we are not making this stuff up. In 2004:

Ted Jelen, a left-wing UNLV political science professor, told a local
alternative newspaper that the reason Democrats dominate in academia is
because "liberals are smarter." ... The local Sierra Club managed to
convince a judicial panel of the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals -- the
most overturned circuit in the country -- to delay the widening of U.S.
Highway 95 in Las Vegas because the project could cause cancer. The Sierra
Club further argued that such a delay wouldn't "inconvenience" local
drivers. ...

The Clark County Commission made it illegal to be a spectator at street
drag races. ... Mayor Oscar Goodman blustered about suing the NFL for
enforcing its copyright protections against casino "Super Bowl" parties and
refusing to run Las Vegas tourism ads during the league's championship
game. ... The Clark County School Board issued a glowing performance review
of Superintendent Carlos Garcia, even though they admitted he had failed to
reduce the number of schools deemed "inadequate" under state law and to
reduce the number of students testing below standards. ... Months later, in
support of a ballot proposal to raise school funding to the "national
average," Mr. Garcia argued that "we've never tried" solving our education
woes by simply throwing money at the problem. ...

A UNLV professor lamented the fact that a study found the gaming industry
increased its productivity by more than 6 percent in the wake of 9-11. ...
An attorney for the university system Board of Regents told the panel that
lawmakers had no authority to pass legislation concerning the application
of out-of-state tuition. ... Organizers of a petition drive to legalize
small quantities of marijuana in Nevada failed when they forgot to turn in
a box of 6,000 signatures. ... Some 19 percent of Clark County high school
seniors didn't receive their diplomas on time this June because they failed
the math portion of the high school proficiency exam. Assemblywoman Chris
Giunchigliani said this meant "we are doing a disservice to these kids." ...

Clark County Recorder Frances Deane was found to have willfully violated
state ethics laws for seeking to profit by selling documents issued by her
own office. ... The Las Vegas City Council voted unanimously to ban new car
sales on Sundays. ... A Reno lawyer sued Coors Brewing Co. on behalf of a
mother whose underage son died in a car wreck after drinking the beer and
driving drunk. ... Controller Kathy Augustine hinted blissfully that she
still has aspirations to higher office even though in November she became
the first constitutional officer in state history to be impeached. ...

The Nevada Taxpayers Association came out against repealing the massive tax
increases imposed by the 2003 Legislature. ... Washoe County attempted to
use eminent domain to seize private property because the owner wanted to
build houses on it. ... Some local homeowners associations refused to let
property owners replace turf with less water-intensive features, as urged
by water officials grappling with the region's drought. ... The City
Council granted 9.5 percent pay raises to Las Vegas Municipal Court judges. ...

A lawsuit sought to prevent Nevada's GOP electors from casting their votes
for President Bush because registration problems might have prevented a
handful of state residents from casting ballots. ... Census Bureau data
revealed that Nevada's public sector work force has the fifth highest
average salary in the nation. ... Mayor Oscar Goodman announced he was in
negotiations to star in a reality TV show. . A proposal to outlaw legalized
prostitution in Nevada's rural Churchill County failed by at 2-to-1 ratio. ...

After claiming two years ago that the state was in a fiscal crisis and then
pushing through $833 million in tax increases, the Guinn administration is
poised to propose as much as a 15 percent state spending increase over the
next biennium. ... The U.S. Mint announced that images that represent
gambling will not be allowed on the Nevada state quarter. ...

Happy New Year.