SHOULD WE NOT LOOK AT OURSELVES IN A MIRROR?

To the Editor:

Since reading the article Feb. 7/05 Heartbroken Barriere Mom Speaks Out, I
have had the privilege of meeting the brave young lady of 16 years of who
the story is about who has taken the biggest step to recovery. She has
willingly picked up a mirror and looked at herself.

She now realizes that there are many concerned and caring people out there
who have let her know that she has their support.

It disturbs me to have discovered that she has been shunned and avoided by
some community members - people who don't want to be seen associating with
her in public places.

Don't be embarrassed to be seen with a troubled person, rather see yourself
as someone who is objective, not judgmental. We need to be very mindful
that good people can make bad choices but that hardly gives us the right to
label that person as a whole to be bad.

It tore at my heart to imagine this girl extending a smile to someone who
reacted by turning his or her back on her. Perhaps we would all do well to
pick up our own mirrors.

I also have a child that is struggling with drug issues, and chances are if
all the parents of children using drugs came forth we'd likely fill the
Star/Journal with our stories.

Sadly though I myself have met several parents who are aware and either
gave the child permission to do it or they turn a blind eye.

I would like to say to these parents that you may think it's just a
temporary phase that he or she will grow out of, or perhaps your child has
convinced you that they aren't using anything other than marijuana. Telling
yourself that's the extent of your childs drug use may well be denial.

Children may believe they will be seen as failures and would rather keep
quiet for fear of disappointing a parent. One of the biggest problems is
that some teens feel they are capable of making wise decisions and are
grown up enough to take care of themselves. My son and his friends claim
that smoking pot is equivalent to getting a prescription from a physician
for anxiety and stress. I'm sure they also have similar comparisons to
using other illegal substance. Basically they feel that using drugs is
completely harmless!

A student may also lose the opportunity to enroll or participate in school
programs if they are known to be using narcotics. Is punishing them the
right way to help them?

Are we naive enough to think this policy will convince them to quit?

By taking away the opportunity to participate in constructive activities we
are actually driving them deeper into the bad habits we want them to quit.

The more we take away, the more idle time they have to waist themselves
away. There is a need for frequent and ongoing communication between our
schools and parents of the child who is struggling. This can't be stressed
enough. We as parents can't be of assistance if we are not informed. It's
important to address the child who may just be discovering the world of
drugs in order to prevent them from becoming a serious addict that faces a
long road to recovery.

A caring mom and dad Barriere, BC