SUDDEN DEATH OF YOUTH A LESSON TO ALL: MOM

Youth And Drugs

Hurting & Healing

Part 1 Of 4

In this four-part series, the North Star sat down with several area
residents to learn more about how drugs and drug abuse has adversely
affected their lives. We learn that it's not just the users battle to
fight-it's also that of those who are closest to them. Critics of the
system say that Parry Sound and area drug and alcohol addiction programs
don't work well because youths with addiction issues have a hard time
opening up to treatment. However, in the Parry Sound area, several drug and
alcohol treatment centres offer programs to help those in need of addiction
counselling and support. The series begins today with the emotional story
of a mother who fought to save her son from the clutches of drug abuse. In
next Wednesday's North Star, reporter Stephannie Johnson speaks with a
mother and her teenaged son, of the youth's battle with drug addiction for
the past year.

by Stephannie Johnson

PARRY SOUND - Many parents have said that there is no greater pain than
that of losing their child. And on May 7, Angela Moffatt was confronted
with every parent's worst fear and her own horrifying nightmare when she
discovered that her son, MacKenzie Stevenson, had committed suicide.

"He turned 18 on the 20th of April, and he killed himself on the 17th of
May," said Ms Moffatt in a soft and steady voice. MacKenzie hanged himself
on the family's property.

"MacKenzie was a really good son. He went out of his way to watch his
sisters so I could go to school. He was happy-go-lucky, fun-loving, kind,
loyal-and he was still all those things, despite his addiction. When he was
without drugs, he was a pretty unhappy camper. I think he suffered
sometimes from depression, because of what his addictions forced him to
do-steal money," Ms Moffatt said. "But he was a really good person, he
really was."

For two years that Ms Moffatt was aware of, MacKenzie was on a path of
self-destruction. With what his mother calls an "addictive personality,"
MacKenzie would often ingest any kind of drug he could get his hands on.

"He was on drugs for at least two years. It was obvious that it was a huge
problem. For two years, I screamed, ranted and raved to get him help. I'm
sure he used drugs prior to that, but I didn't know for sure," Ms Moffatt said.

"He drank, smoked a lot of pot. If I left Tylenol out where he could see
them, he'd take them, just to get a buzz."

Twice during MacKenzie's stint with drug and alcohol addiction, he was
arrested on charges by his mother-that he had stolen her car and bank card.

"I had to charge him, and he went to jail and was then on probation. I had
to be the bad guy because the proper steps weren't being done
automatically," she said. "The last time he went to jail, I did the
research to find out about what programs were available from different
facilities."

For six months last year, MacKenzie received treatment at Cecil Facer, a
prison for young offenders in Sudbury through its New Beginnings program.

"It was a good program. It worked for him for a time, but he couldn't stay
clean," she said. "The half-way house that was an option was in North Bay,
and MacKenzie wanted to be back with his family. So he came back to town
and started using again within a month."

There are several services available in the Parry Sound area to help people
of all ages who are struggling with addiction, including the Children's Aid
Society, Algonquin Child and Family Services, Community Mental Health,
Addiction & Outreach, Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous.

Despite this, Ms Moffatt said MacKenzie wasn't comfortable with any of the
groups, because a majority of them don't cater to younger members.

"I don't want to say there's nothing, but there's not much for young people
in this town when it comes to seeking help with addiction," she said. "I
think there's a lack of awareness and I think people are afraid to confront
the issue of drugs and our youth. I think some parents think it's just kids
from bad families from the wrong side of the tracks that are involved in
drugs. But what they don't realize is it's become an epidemic in this town
and it doesn't matter where you come from."

Ongoing battle

From then on, Ms Moffatt said MacKenzie's drug habit became progressively
worse. She said his battle to stay clean couldn't have lasted, as several
of his friends were also users.

"I asked him why-a lot. He just liked getting high. He knew that it was a
problem for him, that it wasn't recreational. That it was a disease and he
just didn't have the strength to fight it."

During the last year of his life, MacKenzie worked at a variety of jobs,
but he couldn't keep them.

His mother said she imagined he fed his drug habit not only through
stealing and borrowing from friends, but that he was also a dealer himself.

"I suspected he was running and selling drugs for other people. I can't
prove it and I wouldn't want to, I don't think," she said. MacKenzie would
often talk about leaving town, getting away from the people and the place
that were hindering his struggle to stay clean and sober.

"I knew he was into more than just pot and drinking the last couple of
months. I could just see a certain underlying level of agitation," she
said. "I asked him if he was smoking crack and he said 'no,' but what else
is he going to say?"

The coroner told Ms Moffatt that drugs and alcohol were present the morning
MacKenzie took his own life, but the toxicology report hasn't come in yet
to determine which drugs and just how much.

"Some of his friends told me he was smoking crack, that he was on
Oxycontyn. He was doing everything, that was his nature," she said. "A lot
of the drugs that are out there, when you come down off of them, you crash.
I suspect that they played a part in his choice, but I don't know. I don't
know why, I'll never know why. Until I catch up with him I'll never know."

His mother does think that there were a number of factors that may have
played into MacKenzie's decision to end his life.

"When he came home that morning and told me my car had been impounded,
because he stole it, I got up and spent half an hour yelling at him. Then
he left and he killed himself," she said with tears in her eyes. "I don't
think me yelling at him is what did it. I have to assume that it was a
combination of just everything building up and the drugs he was on," Ms
Moffatt said.

It has been a short and painful 109 days since MacKenzie's death. And while
his mother is still grief-stricken, she says it's her other two children
who are living at home with her, that keep her going.

"I would like to prevent any other mother from having to go through this.
There are a lot of kids out there that were friends of MacKenzie's that I
care about a great deal and I'd like to see something in this town that
could help them and other kids that I don't know, who struggle with
addiction. This town needs something to help these kids," Ms Moffatt said.
"I hope that people who read this-especially the kids-take something away
from MacKenzie's death."

She said she made "a lot of noise" with everyone from MacKenzie's probation
officer, to the police, to the courts and to the Crown Attorney in an
attempt to get him the long-term treatment he needed.

"I really stuck my neck out, but if I had to go back and do it again,
knowing what I know now, I wouldn't have cared whose toes I stepped on,"
she said.

Reflecting on what she wishes she could have done differently, in
hindsight, Ms Moffatt said: "I fought as hard as humanly possible for him.
In hindsight, maybe I could have fought a little harder, instead of perhaps
being afraid of making enemies in this town. I think I would have yelled a
little louder."