MOTHER SHARES STORY OF HELPING CHILD CLEAN UP FROM DRUG USE

National Addictions Awareness Week, Nov. 20-26 2005

About two years ago, Alice, not her real name, had to begin facing a long road.

Alice began suspecting her child was involved with drugs; she confronted
her child and was lied to.

Only a month later, Alice had the answer she had been expecting.

"My child is the fortunate one," Alice says.

When Alice had first confronted her child, she did it because of the hours
he would keep, the strange behavior, and the way he looked.

Her child had not had a change of friends.

"It was the same company that was kept."

After Alice had originally confronted her child, she even apologized.

Her child went out one night and returned later with a friend.

Alice knew something was wrong. She had her husband ask the friend to
leave. Meanwhile, Alice found marijuana in her child's bedroom.

She realized "we've got a big problem here" and it needed to be addressed.
They tried to address the situation but realized their child was too high
to even communicate.

So Alice decided to be there for her child and try to help and keep get her
child healthy.

"I think that we had caught the problem when help was ready."

"I sensed that there was a terrible problem, it is really strange as a parent."

Moreover, as a parent, Alice realized there were things she needed to do.

She had contacted AADAC, but was told there was nothing they could do for
him. He just needed to crash.

It was a day and a half later when he could finally communicate with anyone.

Alice and her husband had talked with their child and learned things they
never imagined.

Alice's child told her, "I would have tried to do it myself I was ready."

Alice had learned that her child was selling drugs in support of their
addiction.

She told her child that the drugs had to leave her house. Alice knew the
need of creating a support network for her child and giving boundaries.

The mother felt that if she had thrown her child out, that she would have
found her child dead.

"We are not throwing you out, unless you want to leave," she said.

Her child was put on house arrest, taken care of and always had a phone nearby.

After a month, her child requested to go out. Reluctantly, she agreed
because trust had been pushed in the conversation, a curfew was given.

The friend did get the third degree upon arrival; Alice stressed the curfew.

A day and a half later her child had returned; higher than a kite and
barely able to stand, let alone speak.

"That was the night, I thought I would lose my child," she recalls.

She remembers it being hell, and being that bad for two days. She remembers
her child being angry and nasty, worse than ever.

Alice at one point decided to remove her cleaning products, placing them on
the table and telling her child to get a cup and drink the products.

Her child thought that she was crazy but she said, "It is killing you and
it is killing our family.

Later she sat listening for a few hours about how bad it was, the heroine,
the meth, and the mixture of drugs that had been used.

The child was told to get off the drugs and that the family would be there.

She cut off communication between her child and the outside world.

"No one was getting to my child."

Friends would call with the most ingenious ideas, thinking it was a way to
Alice's child.

Alice spent time screening every one of the friends and callers. She was
shocked to learn 90 per cent of them were involved with drugs. She had also
hired a private investigator and gathered a support network for her child.

"I chose to do the helping myself and build a network," Alice says.

Her child questioned, "What are you doing."

Alice and her child would get into arguments, they would yell at each other.

Her child told her, "You don't realize I am going through withdrawal and
the pain is unbelievable."

Alice listened to her child confide, "Everyday I crave it."

Alice believed that she needed to get her child healthy. She also learned
that many people knew of her child's behavior, but no one ever told her.
She had confronted people that were close to her about not telling her and
how it hurt.

When Alice's child finally cleaned up, it was like a plague for her child
to find a job. It seemed like no one would hire her child.

Alice and her family still talk about the past and her child's battle. She
feels as though their family "went to hell and back."

Alice's largest frustration was that parents need help as well. To know how
to help their child in need.

"That's where we lose our young people," she says.

Alice has reinforced to her child that she does not want anything in return
for helping her child come clean. She has told her child, "You are all we
want."

Now, Alice will inform parents if their child is involved in drugs so that
they can step in.

She believes that it "takes a village to raise a child."