LIVING THE HIGH LIFE WITHOUT DRUGS

Irene Hawksworth spent eight years of her life living in cardboard
boxes on the streets of Victoria, Los Angeles and Hastings Street in
Vancouver.

She now wants other addicts to know that there is a much better life
for them within reach.

"I used to be an intravenous heroin and cocaine addict and thieved and
conned anything and anyone you can ever imagine," she said.

"My life has changed in a miraculous way. I want others to know that
if I can do it, others can too, no matter what shape they are in today."

Up until recently, Hawksworth was the manager of Life Recovery Home,
an 18-bed facility in Abbotsford for women with drug/alcohol
dependencies.

She has been unable to return to work, due to injuries suffered in a
car accident last September, but hopes to continue her work with
women's recovery ministries.

Meanwhile, she shares share her story with others to offer hope and
inspiration.

Hawksworth was five years old when she was forced to make a grown-up
decision. Her alcoholic father lined up his four children against the
wall. He told them that they were going to live separate lives and
each had to pick with whom they wanted to stay.

Hawksworth and her three-year-old sister chose to stay with their
mother, a decision that would affect her for years to come.

Two weeks later, their father came back home to stay.

"He held resentment for me and my little sister so we got the abuse
all the time. We tried to show him that we loved him still but nothing
we did was ever good enough for him," Hawksworth said.

The abuse continued. When she was 13, she started fighting back. One
day when her father raced out to fetch a chunk of wood to clobber her
with, Hawksworth made her escape through the bedroom window, never to
return.

She joined a travelling carnival caravan in Campbell River.

They offered her a job and gave her a roof over her head. She stayed
there for three years and worked her way up to be a hotel manager in
northern B.C.

At the age of 23, however, serious health problems set in and
Hawksworth had major surgery. She was sent home with Demerol for pain.
When she ran out of the medication, her sister gave her a shot of heroin.

"That day, my whole life changed. I was hooked. And within two months
I lost all I had, my job, home, my friends, all my money.

"I met a drug dealer and learned how to be a con-artist in no time. We
went from place to place and within a couple of months I was in jail."

For the next eight years Irene was in and out of jail. She no longer
was afraid of going to prison and was willing to do anything.

"Every time I got out of jail I had the intention of cleaning up my
life. But I always convinced myself that I could just have one shot.
Once I had one, I could not stop and years would go by again on the
street."

Hawksworth had no money to buy drugs she eventually began mixing
cocaine with the heroin and turned to robbing people and selling
her body in order to support her habit.

Her addiction was so intense that the pain of withdrawal kept her
going back.

"The awesome fears of having to go through a withdrawal is one of the
scariest things for anyone hooked on drugs," she said.

Life on the streets was cruel, harsh, unsafe, cold and lonely.

"Bad `dates' was a normal thing to happen. I was left for dead more
than once. I remember once I was left to die alongside a little gravel
road outside a town.

"Then a couple, who had never taken that road before, came along that
day and took me to the hospital. I see now that this couple coming
along at that time truly was divine intervention," Hawksworth said.

Eight years later, Hawksworth found a remarkable recovery through a
former addict who himself had found a better way of life by attending
a recovery program at Matsqui Institution in Abbotsford. He wanted to
give Hawksworth the gift that was so freely given to him.

He took Hawksworth to his friend's place to detox, but she returned to
the street.

It was not until her brother died of a heroin overdose that she was
ready to accept a helping hand.

Hawksworth went through a 12-step recovery program and turned to
Christianity, which she credits with changing her life and keeping her
on track.

At the age of 31, Hawksworth went back to school for three years to
become a registered professional drug and alcohol counsellor.

She then worked at Mission Harmony House and eventually opened a
recovery home in Surrey for 18 months, after which she moved back to
Abbotsford.

Hawksworth now has a five-year-old daughter, for whom her goal is to
model a Christian life.

It has now been 13 years since life on the street. She has worked as
an in-reach worker in the prisons, encouraging inmates towards
lifestyle changes.

She began volunteering at the Life Recovery Home six years ago and was
hired as the manager shortly after.

After five years of being clean, the government cleared Hawksworth of
all criminal records.

She continues to tell her clients: "Look at where I was and look at me
now. If I can do it, any one of you can."

Above all, Hawksworth remembers where she was a few years ago and all
that has changed for her.

"I can't tell you how grateful that I am for the life that I have
today," she said.