AMIDST PROTESTS CAPITOL REVELERS

They say Wisconsin hasn't seen the sort of protests we had in Madison
of late since at least the 1960s. Turns out some folks thought it
actually was the 1960s.

The state just responded to my request to see copies of hundreds of
State Capitol Police reports from February and March during the
height of the protests. We already know all about the serious reasons
people were blowing off steam.

Turns out, though, that wasn't just steam.

It was, right up there on the third floor of the South Wing -
directly above the Senate chambers - the "overwhelming smell of burnt
marijuana" emanating from an orange tent. There was so much smoke, a
"great amount" that was "issuing" from the tent pitched right there
inside our esteemed Capitol , that it was literally "coming out of
cracks," according to the report. One cop was concerned there was
actually an "active fire" inside.

Nope. Just two dudes lying on a sleeping bag in their underwear, a
"roach," rolling papers, a bag of what looked like pot, a glass
"bong" and enough smoke to make Cheech and Chong jealous. Both dudes
were issued citations and one - a juvenile - was turned over to his
mom. I couldn't reach either one so it's not clear if they were
protesting against the Republicans, the Democrats or just the lack of
Doritos in the cafeteria.

The underwear boys were, so far as I can tell, the only alleged
potheads police caught red-handed. But there were clearly a lot of
people who breathed in some of the second-hand smoke.

There was, for instance, a guy succinctly described in reports as a
"male subject dressed in a costume holding a pointed object in front
of" Sen. Chris Larson's office; two gentlemen who apparently drove a
rented van all the way from California to Wisconsin (one that was
eventually reported stolen) to sell protest buttons and - having
trouble finding a parking space when they arrived - just left it in a
Supreme Court Justice's stall; and a man who, for some reason,
notified the police that he'd offered a taxi cab company in Rockford,
Ill. $1,000 to take a picture of one of the Democratic senators
hiding out down there. The cab company, the man also reported, wanted $2,500.

Given what Chicago cabbies ask for a four-block ride through the
Loop, that actually sounds like a pretty good deal to me.

You had to walk through the Capitol during the protests to really get
the flavor of things. What's surprising, the reports indicate, is how
much of the flavor tasted like alcohol.

On Feb. 18, for instance, somebody called the police to say that
"there are a couple people in the basement rotunda that have a bottle
of vodka and are ready for detox." That same night, two state
troopers caught a couple kids - one only 14 - on the second floor at
11 p.m. standing next to a crate with a 1.75-liter bottle of vodka, a
1.75-liter bottle of whiskey, bottles of Squirt and ginger ale and a
quart of orange juice.

It's not clear if the orange juice was a mixer or for breakfast
since, it seems, the kids' parents had given them permission to spend
the night and make some sort of statement. Of course, the statement
turned out to be to police and included the claim they'd gotten the
booze from a man they didn't know wearing a fedora.

Yes, I know there were a lot of serious people at the Capitol as
well. And not everyone appreciated the surreal circus atmosphere. One
woman, for instance, called the police to say it wasn't right that
taxpayers had to foot the bill for, among other things, the
protestors' toilet paper.

Personally, speaking as a taxpayer myself, I think that was probably worth it.