SETTLE DRUGS ISSUE FIRST

Q - I'm the legal guardian of my brother, 14. He failed half his
school classes. Worse, I've learned that he may be using drugs. The
angry father of one of his friends told me with details that my
brother's selling drugs to other kids.

My brother denied everything. But I've also heard from my own friends
that he's hanging around with druggies. He admits this, but denies
participating. I don't know whom to believe because I've lost trust in
him. Yet, I'm apprehensive about wholeheartedly accepting these
stories. What should I do?

- - Uncertain

A - The drugs are the immediate issue, more than his school
performance. Handle this first and then you can focus on getting him
tutoring help, etc.

First, get the truth. Talk to his friends, his teachers, anyone
acquainted with his habits. Then warn him, firmly: If you find he's
involved with drugs, you'll report him to juvenile authorities unless
he admits it to you.

As his guardian, you're there to redirect him far more than punish
him. You need a comprehensive plan to change his attitude, influences
and hangouts. He's young enough to get past this if you show him the
caring and monitoring he needs.

Boost your attention to him; if circumstances make that difficult, get
an outside network going, e.g. Big Brothers, a sports team, a
community youth organization, etc.