ADDICT: I CAN'T SAY NO

A cocaine addiction is like a child's trip to the candy store for Rob
Nitschke. When a child walks into a candy store and sees the shelves
lined with hundreds of different candy options, it's difficult for
them to make a decision and leave the store with just one lollypop or
chocolate bar.

It's a similar experience for Nitschke, who finds himself struggling
when faced with the choice to experience the rush he gets from a hit
of cocaine or walk away.

"I can't say no," the 44-year-old Nitschke said.

That inability to say no led Nitschke down the path to his latest
relapse and possible termination from the county's Safe Streets Drug
Court, a program aimed at helping convicted felons address their
addiction issues.

But Nitschke, who has been in the program for almost two years and
now faces the prospect of going to prison if he is thrown out of the
program after a recent relapse, said he doesn't believe the Drug
court is capable of helping him address his addiction issues.

"It doesn't work. And it hasn't worked," Nitschke said. "I know it's
not going to turn me from an addict to a normal person."

No Easy Path to Sobriety

The frustration Nitschke feels is not an uncommon feeling for people
attempting to overcome an addiction. And it's not unexpected by the
officials involved in running the Safe Streets Drug Court.

The drug court is a three-phase program for adults who have been
convicted of non-violent, drug-related felony offenses and are having
a difficult time staying sober. Participants must make frequent
court appearances, undergo random drug testing and attend group and
individual counseling sessions while maintaining employment and
performing community service.

Nitschke is not the first participant to face possible termination
from the program.

While 20 people have graduated from the program since it was
established in January 2006, 44 have failed -- by either committing
new offenses, using drugs, missing or lying about drug tests, failing
to comply with rules and conditions or by dropping out of the program.

Of those who didn't complete the program, 29 withdrew either because
they had completed their probation and were no longer required to
participate or they have stopped attending Drug court sessions and
team members do not know where they are.

Fifteen people have been terminated from the program, which is not an
easy task to accomplish.

Members of the Drug court team -- which includes prosecutors, judges,
treatment providers, attorneys and probation agents -- realize people
struggling to overcome addiction will rarely be able to kick the
habit easily. They know that for every step forward a person takes
towards sobriety, there will often be stumbles and steps backwards.

But a person's chances at successfully completely the program are not
taken into account when they are placed into the program, said Carol
Morack, Winnebago County's adult AODA and Safe Streets supervisor.
Rather, she said those traits that may lead to struggles are taken
into account when treatment plans are determined.

"You never know if they're going to complete or not complete when
they start the program," she said.

In fact, members of the Drug court team make termination "almost
impossible to achieve," said Winnebago County Circuit Court Judge
Scott Woldt, one of two judges who oversee the program. Termination
is only considered when the person's actions threaten the public's
safety or undermine the integrity of the program.

"My philosophy is that we never terminate anyone for continued use.
There has to be something connected to it," Woldt said. "If someone
is continuing to use, we ask ourselves, 'What are we not doing as a
program to help this person?'"

Even if termination proceedings are started, Woldt said it's not a
given that the person will be thrown out of the program. The judge
who presides over the termination hearing must consider whether all
options available have been offered to the person. In three cases,
Woldt said he has found an option has existed that had not been tried
and rather than terminating the person, he decided to keep them in Drug court.

"Is there anything else I can do for the person? If there is, I keep
them in," Woldt said.

Relapse, Manipulation

Nitschke entered the program in mid-July 2008 as an alternative to
serving prison time when his probation on a cocaine delivery
conviction was being revoked after he relapsed and began using cocaine again.

Even though he was skeptical, Nitschke said he agreed to Drug court
because he did not want to go to prison.

During the nearly two years he's been in the program, Nitschke has
been involved in outpatient treatment -- going to group and
individual counseling sessions to help address his addiction as well
as undergoing random drug testing, maintaining employment and doing
community service.

While he has had some successes, Nitschke said the program as a whole
isn't working for him.

Since he started drug court, Nitschke has had 20 relapses that have
resulted in him having to spend time in jail, do additional community
services, or start a phase over.

Laura Nitschke, 31, has watched as her husband struggled with
sobriety. A former cocaine addict herself, she said she knows how
difficult it is to kick the addiction.

While Drug court may be helpful for some, she said it's not the right
way for her husband to fight addiction and be the father his son, who
turns 3 next month, and her three other children need.

"It's not Rob's fault," she said. "It's a disease. He's tried to
fight it but it's getting the best of him."

Nitschke said he thinks inpatient treatment might help him address
his addiction. He said he has asked the Drug court team for inpatient
treatment on a number of different occasions, but each time has been denied.

However, Morack said that isn't the case.

After his most recent relapse in March, the Drug court decided to
file the petition for termination because of Nitschke's
"unwillingness to respond to interventions."

Morack said she was unable to talk specifically about why the team
believed termination was the best option for Nitschke due to the
pending termination hearing on April 26, but she said the team tried
many different options with Nitschke, including offering him
inpatient treatment on at least two occasions.

Each time, Nitschke refused the treatment and provided excuses such
as not believing it would work or needing to keep working to support
the family.

"We considered his pattern of using, lying and manipulating, which
continued to reinforce his unwillingness to participate in the
recovery program," Morack said. "In addition to all of his rule
violations, we concluded keeping him in the program would not only be
detrimental to our program as a whole, but also to other participants
because we are taking all of these resources away from other people
who are willing to utilize them and make a commitment to the recovery program."

No More Chances?

Nitschke ran into his most recent bump in his road to sobriety on
March 5 when he went to do community service at St. Vincent de Paul.

But instead of spending his time giving back to the community,
Nitschke found himself face to face with his addiction when a former
co-worker came in and offered him cocaine.

One hit of cocaine in a St. Vincent de Paul bathroom led to a
combination of more cocaine and Oxycontin at the residence of an
acquaintance. After blacking out and suffering a seizure, Nitschke
said he remembers having one more eight-ball of cocaine before he
woke up and ordered pizza at what he thought was Rocky Rococo's.

He was actually at the emergency room at Mercy Medical Center. He
tried to leave, but was stopped by a security guard, admitted to the
hospital and handcuffed to the bed in the intensive care unit.

Nitschke estimates he did 7 or 8 grams of cocaine in a 12-hour period
that night.

"I don't know if I can say no," said Nitschke, who admitted the last
relapse scared him. "I know I need to say no and (doctors) say one
more (relapse) and I'll probably be done."

After being released from the hospital on March 9, Nitschke was
transferred to the Winnebago County Jail, where he is waiting to find
out what will happen to him next.

A hearing is scheduled for April 26 before Winnebago County Circuit
Court Judge Barbara Key, one of the two judges who presides over Drug
court. At that time, arguments will be made about whether Nitschke
should be terminated from the program and sent to prison.

While Laura Nitschke doesn't want to think about how to break the
news to her kids that her husband has been sent to prison, Rob
Nitschke said spending time behind prison bars might be a better
option for him instead of going back to drug court.

"I don't think anything good can come out of it now," Nitschke said.
"Part of me does want to go to prison."