THE BLUNT REALITY OF 420

Potheads Should Fear Fillmore On The Holiest Day Of Marijuana Use

Your A Idiot. if you don't know what today is.

Are you high right now? Awwwwww! I'm telling. Are you paranoid yet?
You should be. Fillmore, the drug-sniffing K-9, is standing right
behind you. And he wants a hit, that cheap bitch.

I'm just kidding. Fillmore is a dude, so he can't be a bitch. Also he
sniffs his drugs, so he's much more likely to be into the white
stuff. Somehow I just insinuated that Fillmore is both an illegal
narcotics user and a racist. Meh, one of those notions is probably
true, take your pick.

This is all in jest of course, because we all know that if you were
going to get baked, you probably wouldn't come to campus, and you
probably wouldn't want to read The Towerlight. Seriously, this paper
is trippy. Just check out the suicidal tiger to the left. He's
wearing a tie and holding an alarm clock. That guy has got to be
completely ripped. I wonder if the tiger uses a ROAR.

While not a user myself, I will not condemn those that partake in the
festivities. I will neither condone the use or marijuana, today.
Today's date relates to the number 420, a numerical representation of
all things marijuana. It is not a police code for possession anywhere
in these United States. It is actually the average intelligence
quotient of anyone high on weed at any given time. At least that's
the way it feels, or so I've heard.

The number actually comes from one small group of high school friends
in the 1970s, in Southern California, that used to meet out at the
flagpole at 4:20 p.m. to share a joint. I know it's pretty funny to
imagine people actually smoking weed in a joint. What an inefficient
method of intoxication. They could have so easily shot-up. You can do
that right?

If you are high, then Your A Idiot should finally make sense.
Congratulations! Maybe I should congratulate myself though. I've
written stuff that is amusing to potheads. We all know that it takes
quite a bit to make people, smacked out of their freaking minds, laugh.

This isn't really making any sense at all, is it? Well then I guess
that I can just play it off as a tribute to the completely
incomprehensible ramblings of a pothead. Hopefully those that are
ripped, and do decide to get their money's worth by showing up to
class today, just sit in the back row and observe. I'm not sure if I
could stand having people, beside myself, try to derail the professor
with completely unnecessary and off-track questions that are totally
unrelated to the subject being taught. Arguing with myself about the
concept of string cheese is off-topic right?

Speaking of string cheese, Fillmore and I are going to go grab some
munchies. That canned dog food looks crazy delicious. Hopefully the
cheap bitch doesn't mind sharing.