'NEVER TOO LATE FOR HELP'

Local Cheam Band member Chemaine Douglas recently shared her story of drug
addiction and the road to sobriety in a DVD commissioned by the Sto:lo
Tribal Council and filmed by Bear Image Productions called Drugs
Destruction. The video was shown at the late February conference on drugs,
gangs, and organized crime at the Ramada Conference Centre in Abbotsford. In
addition to Chemaine, it features three others interviewed - two of those
are mothers of addicts and the other is a youth whose father is an addict.

Only in her early thirties, Chemaine has much to share in the way of a
cautionary tale of drug abuse. Here is her story. It goes way back --
she traces her addiction pattern back to a mere nine years old. "I
snuck some of alcoholic 'punch' mix that I had access to at a family
get together. (It may have been a wedding or something like this)
Actively my addiction lasted 21 years, although I am still an addict
just not actively," she says. That first time led to more.

"In the beginning it was any alcohol I could get my hands on --
usually Jack Daniels or Tequila straight out of the bottle -- this
wasn't all the time but I longed for it," she says. At 11, she added
cigarettes to her habits and by 15 moved on to marijuana. In an
unfortunate turn of events, she ended up getting more than she
bargained for.

"It just so happened that some of the first joints I smoked happened
to be laced with cocaine," she says. After that there was little she
wouldn't try.

"I tried everything: cocaine, crack, heroine, speed, mescaline, acid,
and mushrooms," she says. A young pregnancy saved her from her
addictions for a while. While 19 and pregnant with her oldest son, she
managed to stay away from substances for a year. Life continued as
usual until tragedy hit the family when Chemaine was 24.

When her brother was found in at the Mouth of the Vedder River in the
Fraser, murdered in 2001, Chemaine was 24 and had just had her
youngest son, she took his death very hard and started to drink
heavily again.

"From this I became very dependant on the alcohol and before long I
was mixed up and dabbling in the crack cocaine," she says. This led to
her being separated from her young children. In this time she met a
man who meshed with her self-destructive lifestyle.

"We drank a lot," she says, "in this time he eventually strangled,
raped and beat me. I fought him back and was the one charged with
assault, I was too scared by his threats to charge him." Even though
she successfully entangled herself from this abusive man, she was
newly weakened to something much worse.

"With a broken jaw, ruptured eardrum, broken color bone, a cracked
rib, and a broken spirit; I moved home and found crystal meth in the
summer of 2004. This drug is one of the worst things to ever get
caught up in, most of the people that I know and met who use this are
still using this and they look horrible, like the walking dead," she
says. It wasn't her own overdose, but that of her partner that
convinced her to go clean.

Unconventionally they used marijuana to wean themselves off the
crystal meth. Her journey started with quitting meth in the third week
of January 2006; and then in September of the same year, doing away
with alcohol and marijuana too. In between they had a lot of visits
with a drug & alcohol counselor and didn't give up on finding a
treatment space. "So we aggressively persisted with the drug & alcohol
workers to get us into a treatment center asap, this was the one we
went to in Kitwanga (Terrace, BC) on September 17, 2009. Getting out
of addictions -- if you really want to, it will happen," she says. She
describes her crystal meth detox process as "a very confusing process,
lots of anger and violent outbursts."

"Eventually though it did pass, the ergs and the longing for high and
the drug," she says. The work wasn't over though. From the initial
admitting her problem's stature on the bus on the way to rehab to
working through Narcotics Anonymous' 12 steps, staying honest about
what happened during past addiction cycles and being realistic about
even a little bit of using, rehab was a lot of work. Thinking beyond
the physical world to the spiritual gave her more strength.

"Believing that there is someone or something out there watching over
me making sure that I didn't die, that I made it through and that I
was going to be ok even," she says.

In hindsight though, she says the talk about gateway drugs is true,
even if it is just one beer or two that relaxes your judgment when
making a decision about harder drugs.

"Smoking marijuana leaves your mind unclear. Alcohol lowers your
ability to make clear decisions," she says. Chemaine says her
susceptibility to drugs was a combination of easy access, low self
esteem, childhood issues, and 'friends' in the drug crowd. She comes
to the other side of the journey without a pat answer. She doesn't
believe in a simple telling kids not to use ideal.

"Well I can only say this; with my kids I do not hold back on any
thing, I tell them as it is. I do not believe that any age really is
too young to talk to them about it, especially if they are questioning
or mentioning something they may have seen and are wondering about.
The difference from me to my parents is: I do not say to them "don't
ever do this or else', which is something I heard when I was young and
then rebelled and tried just because. I just hope that they'll think
before they make any choices to try or experiment with this, and
understand that if something traumatic happens in there life there is
alternatives to dealing with it. Plus I lead by example; when by
husband and I decided to quit smoking cigarettes, we were tired of the
kids asking all the time are you done your smoke yet, or we'll do this
but I guess you need a smoke first and it was comments like this that
made us realize we needed to consider the option to quit," she says.

Her life post-drugs is a happy ending although it took a bit to get
there.

"Well the first year seemed very long, although rewarding. I say it
felt long because I was so used of the fast pace of the demanding drug
world," she says. It wasn't that long until they were able to reward
themselves for living constructive lives without drug habits dragging
them down.

"After the first few months of quitting smoking cigarettes we were
able to purchase ourselves a 46inch widescreen TV, and since then we
now have two vehicles." Today they both have full time employment. She
is thankful they were able to go through rehab together and come out
on the other side an intact family.

"I am very fortunate to have this as most recovering addicts are
unable to do this together. My kids are settled in and we have picked
up the regular pace of family life. Life is rewarding, and definitely
worth living," she says. She looked for other ways to give back as
well and is aware of the choices needed every day to stay clean
another day.

"I also ran an NA group for almost a year that helped me to give back
to the community and it also helped me to clear my mind if I had
arousing issues or concerns. And even this interview now, helps me to
not forget that yes I am an addict. I just choose not to use today,"
she says.

Even for those feeling enmeshed in the lifestyle and addiction, it is
never too late to seek help. To those people who want more for
themselves and their loved ones Chemaine says, "Don't give up; believe
in what it is you really want. Like I was told 'you can make as many
excuses not to, but all you need is the one to do it'."