TAKING A HIT

Michael Phelps and the Media's Overreaction

So Michael Phelps was caught smoking marijuana, and guess what? I
don't care, and neither should you.

Yes, I am aware that there is photographic evidence of him inhaling a
substance that is illegal in the U.S.. Yes, I'm aware that in doing so
he acted irresponsibly and was not conducting himself in the manner of
the role model he has become to Speedo-wearing children everywhere
since winning eight gold medals in the 2008 Beijing Olympics. And yes,
I'm aware that Richland County Sheriff Leon Lott says he will charge
Phelps with a crime if he determines the Olympics hero smoked
marijuana in Richland County.

I don't care, because the same people trying to tear this athlete down
from his pedestal are the same people who put him up there in the
first place. Am I expected to believe that this is the first Olympic
athlete to ever take a bong hit at a party a few months after winning
gold? Hell, I know he's not the first Olympic athlete to take a bong
hit, as Canadian snowboarder Ross Rebagliati was stripped of his gold
medal from the 1998 Nagano Winter Olympics after testing positive for
marijuana, only to have it handed back to him later. So far, Phelps is
only at risk of being stripped of his million dollar endorsement deals.

"Seeing my mom reminded me of how it was the day after I got my
D.U.I., and I swore to myself I'd never do that again," Phelps said in
an interview with The Baltimore Sun. Oh hey, right, he was sentenced
18 months of probation in 2004 for a D.U.I. charge too! How could I
ever forget? Maybe it was because no one seemed to particularly care,
just like the media doesn't care when a new celebrity gets a D.U.I.,
treating such crimes almost as if they're a rite of passage. No one
seemed up in arms about Phelps putting himself behind the wheel of a
vehicle while intoxicated, yet sitting in a circle passing a pipe is
such a serious issue?

This situation demonstrates the way marijuana is viewed and
criminalized in America, which is bizarre and ridiculous. Maybe films
such as Reefer Madness that "warned" audiences of how smoking pot
would cause you to become a homicidal maniac have been satirized for
today's audiences, but from what can be seen of the coverage on
Phelps's indiscretion, the mainstream media hasn't ventured far from
the views shared by my 70-year old grandparents.

In a statement released by one of his agents, Phelps issued an apology
saying, "I engaged in behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated
bad judgment. I'm 23 years old and, despite the successes I've had in
the pool, I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner
people have come to expect from me. For this, I am sorry. I promise my
fans and the public it will not happen again." I'm pretty sure most
apologies for smoking weed go more like, "Oh shit!" or "Hey man, don't
rag on me man, it's just a little weed, heh heh heh." But this was not
deemed good enough to redeem this record-setting athlete in the eyes
of Maggie Rodriquez on The Early Show, who said "That's kind of (the),
'Hey, I'm a young kid, and look, we all do things' excuse."

Hey, guess what Maggie? Phelps is 23 and people in their 20s do stupid
things all the time. There are many, many more people in the public
eye who are much bigger role models than Michael Phelps who are living
much more scandalous lives. What Phelps has accomplished is
incredible, but how many Olympic athletes can you name from four years
ago besides him? Let's be realistic - Phelps' fame has an expiration
date. Phelps is going to milk as much endorsement money as he possibly
can, maybe compete in another Olympic games, and then slowly the name
"Michael Phelps" will disappear from our vocabulary.

This is why I don't care, because two weeks from now, no one else is
going to care either. The sheriff in Richland County will get his 15
seconds of fame, newspapers everywhere will get their sports section
filled, Perez Hilton will get sick of drawing penises on pictures of
Phelps in a Speedo, and everyone will move on to something else . . .
probably Miley Cyrus.