SO WHAT IF PHELPS ISN'T SO PERFECT?

HIS IMAGE always was pure fabrication, manufactured by those seeking
a neat symbol for American supremacy. As the undisputed king of the
Olympics yet still projecting a blue-collar sensibility, Michael
Phelps was uniquely suited for mass consumption.

He was packaged so well that we shrugged when in interviews away from
the pool he was exposed as a young man of modest presence. There was
no regal bearing. No aura, no discernible charisma, certainly no halo.

Part of Phelps' appeal, we reasoned, stemmed from him being a regular
kid, an everyman who happens to swim like a shark.

So maybe we shouldn't forget that now that he was photographed
committing the kind of misdemeanor regular kids commit every hour of
every day, on every continent.

And maybe we shouldn't be surprised that the greatest swimmer ever,
four years removed from a drunken driving conviction -- while
underage -- walks into a South Carolina home filled with college
students and gets his party on to such a wild degree he reaches for
the hippie lettuce.

In full view of anyone who cared to watch!

Inasmuch as Phelps has grown up in the digital age, represented his
country around the world and recovered from a 2004 DUI conviction to
be named Sportsman of the Year in 2008, this amounts to felony
stupidity and a staggering lack of sophistication.

Clearly, Phelps knows how to hitch a ride to Stupidville, where the
only requirement is leaving your brain behind.

The poor judgment, from here, is far more disappointing than the
revelation that a 23-year-old athlete smokes dope. No kidding?

What's worse is that someone might try to capitalize on Phelps'
brazen display of idiocy. Though police at the University of South
Carolina and in the city of Columbia have express no interest in
pursuing criminal charges, the Richland County Sheriff cleared his
throat and barked out his intentions to live up to one the many
stereotypes attached to Southern lawmen.

"This case is no different than any other case," said Sheriff Leon
Lott, whose reputation is as a strict anti-drug crusader. "This one
might be easier since we have photographs of someone using drugs and
a partial confession."

Lott is contemplating going after Phelps, charging him for the
misdemeanor that is punishable by up to 30 days in jail, with a $570
fine and court costs.

Well now, it appears somebody wants to be on TV. Seriously, Lott is
of a mind to use taxpayer dollars to file criminal charges against
Phelps. Victory, I suppose, would be a conviction, after which Phelps
would be cuffed and transported to jail, where he can break bread
with his fellow convicts.

That'll teach him, eh?

Well, no. It won't. Prosecuting, convicting and jailing Phelps -- as
highly unlikely as it may be -- would only manufacture a famous
symbol for the ongoing folly of the so-called "war on drugs." Which,
given the magnitude of the real issues we face as a society, seems
more pointless than ever. It's an abject failure on every level,
unless you consider overcrowded prisons an indication of success.
This "war," copiously funded, is the justice system equivalent of a
dog chasing its tail -- while costing the government money it
couldn't afford then and certainly can't now.

Yet there is Phelps, one of the greatest athletes of any generation,
lighting up anyway. It should be enough to make us pause to reconsider.

How do we compare the effect of Phelps' smoking on his swimming
career with, say, that of John Daly's drinking on his golf career?

Does the image of Phelps with his lips to a bong actually criminalize the man?

Does it unwittingly support those seeking to decriminalize or
legalize marijuana?

Please, no hysteria. While some maintain that marijuana is a
"gateway" drug, a precursor to crack or heroin or crystal meth and
other hard drugs, most of the research studies say otherwise.

Phelps' eight gold medals in eight events scripted a heartwarming and
inspiring tale, rich in the characteristics of hard work, dedication
and unbending will. Dreaming big and succeeding, he was the god of
the Beijing Games. He still is.

Knowing he can achieve while being susceptible to unhealthy impulses
has to mean something. And it can't be as simple as an imperfect man
being a perfect athlete. Can it?

That Phelps got caught is a statement on his ability to self-govern.
That he smokes pot is a statement about us and our laws and much of
what we thought we knew.

While the greatest swimmer ever checks the mirror, would it hurt if
we all did the same?