TAKE A HIT OF SCIENCE

If you're reading this column you probably live somewhere in the
vicinity of UC Berkeley, a university that is famous (or infamous) for
a few things. One would be deeply depressed nerds bawling over their
latest midterm-a stereotype I see a great deal (in the mirror).
Another may be the amazing scientific research that goes on in the
laboratories all around campus, or the infectious activist spirit, the
large homeless population, a fantastic academic environment and last,
but certainly not least, marijuana. Yes, everyone from Berkeley has
almost certainly come in contact with Cal's favorite plant somehow,
most likely by walking down Telegraph Avenue. I never really enjoy it
when I'm out for a stroll and the unmistakable smell mauls my
nostrils, but in the end it's just another one of those lovable
Berkeley quirks.

However, marijuana outside of Berkeley and similarly ? umm ? "mellow"
towns is a tricky subject. Many people have a very negative
association with the drug or just don't want to get caught up in the
legalities involved. The federal government has a strong ban on any
cannabis product, classifying it as a Schedule 1 drug. This means
that, according to the U.S. Drug Enforcement Agency, marijuana can do
severe damage to the human body, is highly addictive and does not have
any medical purposes. Funny how science disagrees with all three of
those statements, as does the state of California. Under state law,
marijuana is legally obtainable for a documented medical condition
that may cause excessive pain, nausea and other uncomfortable effects.
Right now many people in California with diseases like cancer,
multiple sclerosis and chronic back pain need marijuana to be able to
function and are technically in violation of federal law because of
it. Yay federalism and its effectiveness!

Another unpleasant side effect of the federal government's ban is the
lack of testing that can be done with cannabis and its derivatives.
New research in other countries has suggested that marijuana products
can be applied to shrink tumors and even reduce neurological damage
done by AIDS and Alzheimer's. Drugs derived from cannabis are in late
clinical trials in Europe and one drug is already on the market in
Canada, according to an article on slate.com. The United States,
however, is making far less headway with marijuana research. Now we
Americans have to ask ourselves if an age-old stigma is blocking
serious research into curing the diseases of potentially millions of
people.

By now, some people may have a hippie warning siren going off in their
head. Conservative fathers everywhere are putting my name on a
blacklist in case I ever try to date their daughters, further reducing
my chances with women. I assure you I'm not advocating any sort of
mass legalization of marijuana-that of course would have the horrible
consequence of, well, nothing really.

But I digress. My main point is simply that we must decriminalize
marijuana at least a little bit, just down to a level where we can
legally test it for medical applications. You hear that, right-wing
nut jobs? Just a little bit of decriminalization, that's all! The idea
that THC/cannabis/marijuana has no medical purpose is absurd and
consistently shot down by scientific studies across the globe. The
negative effects of the drug, while definitely real, are also greatly
exaggerated.

In fact, the history of cannabis products is much more based on
political fear than any sort of objectivity or science. The U.S.
Supreme Court ruled against state medical marijuana laws in 2001,
furthering the overkill of the War on Drugs declared in the 1980s
under the Reagan and Bush (Sr.) administrations. This is why, in the
eyes of the federal government, marijuana is lumped in with drugs like
heroin and LSD. Some also feel that the criminalization of marijuana
earlier in the 20th century emerged from racism toward
cannabis-smoking immigrants when they started to take jobs away from
Americans during the Great Depression. Yet again, no one seems to care
at all about facts, science or being rational.

Every day people in hospitals around the globe have to take morphine
for pain, one of the most addictive substances known to mankind. This
is accepted and legal, yet we can't put aside some hard feelings to
try to develop an alternative drug for our ill? That's pretty uptight,
man. If only we had some way to make you more relaxed.