DON'T BE SURPRISED IF YOUR HUSBAND CHOOSES DRUGS OVER YOU,
DAUGHTER

DEAR RHONA: I found out my husband was into cocaine when we first met.
He stopped when I said I wouldn't continue seeing him. We've been
together four years, married for one. Six months ago when our daughter
was born, I found out he'd been doing coke the whole time we've been
together. I was crushed. He said the last time he indulged was
Christmas Eve and that he would stop for our daughter's sake. But I
found a bag when cleaning out our bedroom. He was locked in the
bathroom yesterday with our wireless computer. I checked the history
and he was watching transvestite porn. I am afraid he is leading a
double life. What I should do? -- Duped

Dear D: Yeah, most women really hate it when they marry a nice,
regular man only to find out that he's a sexually confused,
drug-addled sneak. But some of the squeeze is on you. You knew he had
a serious relationship with drugs before he had one with you. Most
people find that giving up the associated rush and excitement to be
rather difficult. You should have been suspicious when he offered no
resistance to quitting. Other than demanding a regular urine test,
there's no way to know for sure that he is clean. This requirement is
usually a relationship deal-breaker, as it puts one partner in the cop
position. I don't know what demons lurk in his head, but surely he is
in need of some outside input. Insist that he go to a 12-step program
and get some help. Don't be surprised if he chooses his lifestyle over
his family. That is the nature of addiction.