BUZZ: DIM BULBS

Buzz doesn't cry, but even we can be moved by the news once in a
while. The stories in April about Mercy, the dog that rescuers tried
and failed to save after she was intentionally set afire, were pretty
sad, for instance, but years in the news biz has hardened our heart
and tear ducts.

Still, it was all Buzz could do to keep from weeping like a crocodile
when we read Dallas Morning News reporter Kimberly Durnan's
first-person account Monday of the discovery of an indoor marijuana
garden upstairs from her SMU-area condominium. About 100 pot plants,
some nearly ready for harvest, were destroyed when neighbors tipped
the police to strange odors and weird goings-on at the condo.

Oh, the humanity. Oh, the stupidity of growers who start a weed farm
in an apartment building.

Still, Durnan managed to leaven our heartache with a little
unintentional humor, writing that cops found "elaborate grow lights
that used bulbs worth about $1,000 each."

A thousand bucks for a light bulb? That would go a long way toward
explaining the high-cost of locally grown hydro...or so we hear. (See
"The Other Farmers Market," October 13, 2005.) We checked with a local
hydroponics supply house. The pricier bulbs designed for growing
plants range somewhere around $100.

A $1,000 bulb would be pretty damn bright--maybe the Morning News
could use one of them to illuminate their search for Angie Barrett,
the former wife of Dallas philanthropist Bill Barrett. No mention of
her managed to make it into last Thursday's Morning News obituary of
Bill Barrett, described by News Editor Robert W. Mong Jr. as "one of
the great stalwarts of The Dallas Morning News Charities campaign over
the years."

Of course, this is the same paper that neglected to report anything in
2002 when Angie Barrett was suspected of assaulting her elderly
husband and the case against her was suspiciously dropped by the
Dallas County District Attorney's Office. (See "Bill Due," April 18,
2002.)

Think there's a connection between Bill's stalwartness and the obit's
failure to mention his ass-whuppin' ex? Does marijuana grow in condos?
(Excellent name for a variety of weed, by the way: Mondo Condo.)

By now you might be wondering how Buzz's warped mind can tie together
marijuana plants, the Morning News and a curious omission in what was
ostensibly a "reported" obit. It's easy. Two words: bush league.