HERE'S WHY I SMOKE MARIJUANA

In 1983, a bullet in the neck made me a quadriplegic. Pot helps me
deal with the resulting muscle spasms in a way no legal drug can.

I smoke marijuana.

I inhale every time, too - usually once or twice a week for the past
four years, since I discovered pot's incredible medicinal value.

Every time I do it, I break the law. Possessing marijuana for any
purpose is a criminal offence.

I need to smoke marijuana. Simply put, the quality of my life is
improved by marijuana in a way that pharmaceutical medication cannot
accomplish.

I have been a quadriplegic since 1983, when a bullet in the neck put
an end to my short-lived career as a convenience store clerk.

Although I cannot move a muscle from my shoulders down, the muscles
themselves can move. Shortly after my injury, they began to twitch
spontaneously.

At first it was the odd jerk of one of my legs or arms, but fairly
quickly my limbs became much more spastic.

The spasms are a common symptom of quadriplegia. Doctors say it's the
body's reflexes responding on their own, since, with spinal cord
injury, the messages from the brain that controls the body are cut
off.

Early on, I was given a drug, Baclofen, for the problem. I have been
at the maximum dosage for the past 15 years. Without that, I am sure
my body wouldn't sit still for a second.

As it is, the spasms can come at any time and are of varying degrees
of intensity. It's like my body is a rubber band, getting stretched
tighter and tighter. When it is impossibly taut, it snaps. That is the
spasm.

Sometimes one of my legs will bounce up and down for several seconds,
earning me the nickname Thumper from my kid sister (after the rabbit
in Bambi).

They aren't painful, but they can be overwhelming. They affect my
ability to operate my electric wheelchair, and they can keep me awake
at night. Sometimes, when I am driving my chair, they can put me in
jeopardy.

Nothing stops the spasms as instantly and effectively as smoking a bit
of pot. And the effect lasts for hours.

But marijuana is a drug, critics say. People smoke it to get
high.

Very true. I'd be lying if I said marijuana doesn't affect my mind as
well as quell my spasms, because it does - that's why I only smoke
after work or on weekends.

The therapeutic benefits of cannabis have been documented for 5,000
years. The drug originated in the East, but came to western Europe
when Napoleon invaded Egypt and brought ``hash hish'' back to France.

Cannabis for recreational use became illegal in 1923, although it
could be prescribed as a medicine until 1932, when prohibition of it
became complete.

Many attribute the ban to the pharmaceutical companies, which began to
wield great power and influence at that time. They theorize marijuana
was too much competition for manufactured drugs.

Since that time, marijuana has been ``demonized,'' says noted
scientist David Suzuki.

``It's obviously a very beneficial, useful drug,'' he told me last
week. The evidence of its therapeutic value is ``indisputable.''

Suzuki wants marijuana decriminalized. ``There's good literature now
that would suggest that it's time to get on with making it widely
available,'' he says.

People didn't look again at marijuana's medicinal benefits until the
1970s.

Many clinical studies suggest it alleviates muscle spasticity, nausea,
pain, epilepsy, glaucoma, anorexia, bronchial asthma, insomnia,
depression and some psychiatric disorders.

But, without government or pharmaceutical studies, it is still not
known how - or why - cannabis works.

There are more than 60 compounds, or cannabinoids, unique to
marijuana. In all, marijuana contains some 240 active ingredients.
It's likely that different compounds work for different symptoms.

The only cannabinoid that has been isolated is THC
(tetrahydrocannabinol), the psychoactive one. A synthetic version of
THC has been created, called Marinol, but without marijuana's other
unique ingredients, it's not the same. Many people say it's not
effective; others find it makes them violently ill.

Even with studies under way in several countries - including Canada,
after Health Minister Allan Rock announced clinical trials would begin
this year - it will still be years before cannabis is fully understood.

The real question is, what will happen in the meantime?

The medicinal benefits are well documented and widely accepted. My own
experience testifies to it and so do the experiences of my friends.

In 1995, my friend Dan was dying of AIDS. Sitting at my dining room
table, I saw his face turn green at the sight, smell or even thought
of food. Then he smoked some pot. Within minutes, his colour returned,
he smiled and dug in.

Anti-nausea drugs are okay. Why not marijuana?

Then there was the mother of a friend of mine who got through her
chemotherapy by smoking pot.

She treated each joint as seriously as she did all her other
medication, except for one difference - because of the stigma, it had
to be hidden from all but her family and closest friends.

She needed marijuana in order to tolerate her cancer treatment, yet -
like so many people - she felt she had to keep her use of it hush hush.

That angers me. It distresses me even more that so many people don't
even try it, or worse, can't get it.

Why are pharmaceutical products so easily accepted, but this drug
isn't?

Until a couple of months ago, I bought my marijuana from dealers I met
through friends. I would call a pager and get a home delivery.

I've been lucky that I've never been sold anything laced with bad
chemicals. That risk alone justifies a legally approved source.

I recently learned about Toronto's Medical Marijuana Resource Centre
and, with my doctor's endorsement, became a member.

For my condition, marijuana works and my doctor acknowledges this
fact. (So do my parents. My mother is among the family and friends who
have helped me pack, hold and light the pipe I use.)

Through this buyer's club, I can buy marijuana that is guaranteed to
be high-quality and organic.

Since joining, I've met and spoken to many people who are in the
movement to decriminalize marijuana for those with medical conditions.
I have developed tremendous respect for these people who are putting
themselves on the line for their beliefs.

Of course, there are some people who do use pot to excess. But basing
policy on that fact doesn't make sense. If excessive use was a valid
reason to maintain prohibition, then alcohol would still be illegal.

In fact, compared to marijuana, liquor is clearly far more
destructive.

So it's ironic that it is marijuana that is still illegal. Even
marijuana used for therapeutic purposes.

If charged and found guilty of possession, most people - at least
those without a previous record - will get a discharge or a small
fine. But judges have the power to send users to prison for as long as
three years. Even without being jailed, a person usually ends up with
a record.

With tobacco and alcohol so universally available and acceptable, and
so potentially destructive to one's health, it's ludicrous that
marijuana is prohibited, even for medicinal purposes.

Like all other supporters of therapeutic marijuana, I am encouraged
that this government is holding clinical trials. But in the meantime,
there are many people who could benefit from cannabis right now.

As I do.

I smoke marijuana because it improves my medical condition
considerably. And I refuse to feel fear or shame because of that.