SPIES WHO LOVE YOU

Why Do Some Parents Snoop - And Just How Far Will They Go?

Admit it. You've snooped around in your parents' room and listened in
on their conversations at least once or twice. But then, you had good
reason, right? You absolutely had to make sure they remembered to get
you that new, 3-D video game for your birthday!

Well, guess what? Your parents may think they have reason to spy on
you too. They may poke around in your closet, log onto your e-mail
account or listen in on your phone conversations.

In extreme situations, parents who are very worried about their kids
may resort to hiring a private investigator like George Scharm of
Evanston. "Parents who hire me are usually concerned about drug use,"
says Scharm, who charges $65 an hour to trail kids. Other parents
invest in high-priced equipment that can track their kid's every move
- -whether it's in the family car, on the computer or behind closed doors.

Feeling paranoid? Well, keep in mind that parents don't usually invade
their kid's space for kicks. But what if a child is up to serious
trouble? In some cases, parents can be held legally responsible. "In
Illinois, parents can be sued up to $2,500 for damages inflicted due
to a child's criminal behavior," says Harold Krent, a Chicago-Kent
College of Law professor.

(Also, the Tribune reported last week that the parents of one of the
gunmen in the recent Littleton, Colo., high school shooting were being
sued for $250 million by a victim's parents.)

Most important, parents want to protect their kids. "Kids can get into
enough trouble to ruin their lives," points out Susan Ginsberg, author
of "Family Wisdom."

That's why Kala K., 13, of Montrose, Colo., agrees that sometimes
parents have to spy. "I don't think parents should be able to snoop
unless they have a suspicion of drugs or alcohol - or that their kids
are into something dangerous like the teenagers in Littleton, Colo."

But Patrick Grene, 10, of Mineola, N.Y., says he wouldn't respect his
parents as much if they spied on him. "You might not want to listen to
them" if they'd spied.

Kids don't have much legal claim to privacy. Adults have some legal
protection against eavesdropping or other high-tech electronic
sleuthing, but parental spying is OK. "The kid has a right to a
parent's love, affection and protection, but a right to privacy is
something a child has to earn from his parents," says Clifford
Fishman, a law professor at The Catholic University in Washington. In
other words, your parents are free to flip through your diary or
listen in when you chat with your pals.

The easiest way for kids to avoid the spying issue altogether, experts
say, is to eliminate parents' worries. The more you shut out Mom or
Dad, the more suspicious of you they will become. "You need to be open
with your parents and allow them to be a part of your life," says Gary
Ingersoll, a professor at Indiana University's School of Education.

High-Tech Sleuthing

You don't need training in artificial intelligence to become a spy.
Here are some gadgets on the market today that can help your mom or
dad morph into the next Agent 007: Telephone recording system: Think
you'd know if someone recorded your conversations? High-tech systems
that cost about $130 are voice-activated and pick up without the
slightest click.

Doorknob alarm: Forget about breaking curfew. If your parents hang
this small alarm box on the doorknob outside your room, watch out! One
twist of the handle sets off enough sound and light to rival a rock
concert.

Pin-hole video cameras: With a lens the size of the head of a nail,
these cameras can be mounted behind a wall, in a clock, on the
dashboard of a car.

Infrared alarms: Don't think about sneaking out of the window!
Installed outside the house, these devices send out an infrared beam
that detects anything that gets in its path.

Computer-tracking software: Parents can download software from the
Internet to trail a kid's electronic footsteps. "The software will log
every keyboard stroke you make to determine what Web sites you visit,"
says Randy Truss, product specialist for Espionage Unlimited.

Pen microphone: This pen may look ordinary. But if you take it out of
its case and set it down, you can pick up every word in the room.

In short, your parents can follow you almost anywhere!