Index for the D.A.R.E. FAILING OUR KIDS series:

Sun, 27 Feb 2000:

D.A.R.E. Doesn't Work
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n281/a04.html

DARE Wary Of Outside Reviews
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n281/a02.html

Some Schools Opt Out Of Program
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n282/a04.html

Officers Become School Favorites
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n281/a06.html

Officers Hope To Make A Difference
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n292/a02.html

Analysis Tracks Students' Drug Use
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n292/a03.html

Mon, 28 Feb 2000:

DARE's Clout Smothers Other Drug Programs
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n292/a04.html

Raves Thrive As Teen Drug Havens
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n293/a04.html

Parents Struggle When Discussing Drugs With Teens
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n292/a05.html

Tips For Parents
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n293/a03.html

Parents' Anti-Drug Resource Guide [many website links]
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n293/a02.html

Tue, 29 Feb 2000:

Editorial: Drugs: Dare to be Honest
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n293/a05.html

Readers: Cops Key to DARE Success, Failure
http://www.mapinc.org/drugnews/v00/n293/a06.html

PARENTS STRUGGLE WHEN DISCUSSING DRUGS WITH TEENS

Break The Ice, Use Help Out There. Be Frank, Experts
Say

The awkward teen watches in discomfort as his father cracks his
knuckles and says, "Your mother and I have to talk to you."

Desperately wanting to reach the young boy on his terms, mom places a
boom box on the coffee table of their living room. She slides on a
pair of hip fly-eye sunglasses and flips her baseball hat around backwards.

"Marijuana," his father says. The boy looks skeptically at his
parents.

Just when he is so painfully embarrassed that he wants to disappear,
it gets worse.

His mother presses play on the boom box and the formal family room is
filled with beating rap thumps. His father, in a hopeless attempt to
dance to the rhythm, begins his first lecture on the danger of drug
use.

"The wacky weed, it is bad..." his father begins, to the humiliation
of his son.

While this scenario was manufactured in a television studio, while
making a commercial, similar scenes occur all over America as parents
- -- many who have experimented with drugs themselves -- grapple with
talking to their children about drugs. Only the dreaded "sex talk" is
more uncomfortable and complicated for everyone involved.

The voice over of this particular commercial, paid for by the
Partnership for a Drug Free America, says "Any way you choose to talk
with your kids about drugs is a good way."

Danyelle Clark says she reaches for any help she can get in discussing
drugs with her daughter, Christian, 12. She just graduated from the
DARE program and her mom, a Detroit school teacher, is pleased.

"It broke the ice for discussion," she said.

Danyelle, 30, recalls growing up in a household where drugs were never
mentioned.

"We didn't have programs like this," she said, referring to DARE. "We
didn't talk about this with our parents. They believed if you talk
about it, you do it. It was always those other people who took drugs."

Talking about drugs with your kids is complicated because parents are
so passionate about their children's safety, yet they don't want to be
overbearing, experts say. So much rides on the discussion, and parents
don't want to slip up.

But further complicating the discussion is that parents who have
themselves experimented with drugs, yet tell their children to stay
away, are being hypocritical. And parents who have never done any
drugs may not know what they're talking about.

"Kids are always looking for hypocrisy -- especially high school kids,"
said Melanie Connorly, a counselor at Lake Shore High School. "They
have hypocrisy radar built into their brains."

Connorly said that neither background is particularly better than the
other for discussing drugs with your children.

But, she added, "If they're currently doing drugs and they try to tell
their kids not to, then forget it."