NO HARD DRUGS

Two years ago as a freshman -- bright eyed, bushy tailed and ready to
begin my wholesome education -- I strolled into my philosophy
discussion with an open mind, ready to learn from my "more than
capable" and "morally sound" assistant instructor. To begin the
course, our humble teacher decided to get to know us better. So he
inquired about what we kids were doing for fun those days. We
bombarded him with talk of bars, bowling and other bull, and finally
someone returned the question: What do you do for fun? His response:

"Lots and lots of drugs."

The conversation that ensued involved speeches about cocaine and
"hardcore smack."

It has taken me a good amount of time to figure out what to make of
my AI's blunt statement in that first discussion section so many days
ago. But thanks to recent news, I think I can finally sift through my
thoughts and string them together coherently.

To my former AI: Dude, get a new hobby. And students shouldn't follow
his example regarding hard drugs. There are plenty of other
activities that are both mind-altering and available that are a lot
more legal -- or, at least, a lot safer.

For example, when a survey was conducted of 7,600 Indiana college
students, it was found that 45 percent binge drink. So getting a
designated driver and goin' out to join the crowd may be beneficial,
especially if it keeps you from shooting up. I know it may seem like
a lot of people drink just to be part of a group, but here's to those
who, when asked, "If everyone else was jumping off a bridge would you
jump too?" respond enthusiastically, "Someone's jumping off a
bridge?! I'm there!"

Or you might hang out with the Alpha Epsilon Phi women and fly higher
than a Chicago kite (windy city -- get it?). The Indiana Daily
Student reported that three students were cited for either marijuana
possession or paraphernalia earlier this week. Obviously someone
knows how to have a good time without hard drugs. It could be a good
alternative to hard drugs to make friends with them, chill out,
partake in that kind of activity and maybe even get yours. It would
probably be a good idea not to set off the fire alarm though.

Not only would it be a good idea to avoid hard drugs, it's probably
the most practical course of action given the recent bust in
Bloomington. On Thursday, IDS reports indicated that 33 grams of
cocaine were removed from the streets after the Bloomington Police
Department made three arrests in relation to a traffic stop. Leave it
to the BPD to force those of you with drug habits into consumption of
lesser evils. I commend them for doing so.

Let me reiterate that some things are just plain dumb, and staying
away from them is the best option. Have fun, but don't kill yourself.
And if you're considering doing something hardcore, put down the
needle, and pick up the phone. Drinks are on me!

"No hard drugs"