THE MARCH ON ROCKVILLE AND OTHER LIGHT-HEARTEDNESS

ANNAPOLIS - Singing their show-ending song to the melody of "Take Me Out To
The Ball Game," members of the General Assembly closed out a two-hour
satiric revue at St. John's College Wednesday night:

Thanks for watching our follies,

Thanks for seeing our show,

We're letting off steam, cause our work is through,

The best is sharing our laughter with you.

For the memories that we garner as the lawmaking ends,

Hold us fast, last, all through the year and we'll come back friends!

Smart Follies 2000 was the latest in the tradition of annual events that
break up the stress and strain of the three-month legislative session.

The party features parodies of legislators and their lives during the
session with skits, music, dance numbers and comic monologues that spared
no one - from the governor and State House leadership to freshman lawmakers
- - and no issue.

Skits titled "Cannabis-Care," "County Executive Song," "Like a Freshman,"
"Kumar the Magnificent" and "War Between the Counties" kept the audience
howling.

In "War Between the Counties," soldiers from Prince George's County, led by
their general - Rushern L. Baker III (D-Dist. 22B) of Cheverly - marched on
Rockville to settle a dispute that arose after Montgomery County lawmakers
killed some of their bills.

"I don't know but I've been told, Doug Duncan looks 15 years old," the
Prince George's soldiers called out as they marched.

Montgomery County soldiers, led by their general - Kumar P. Barve
(D-Dist.17) of Gaithersburg -- responded with, "We'll defend Montgomery,
our Chardonnay, our quiche and Brie. Prince George's malls are mighty poor,
they look just like a dollar store."

The skit ended with Baker saying to Barve after none of the guns would
fire, "Well, I guess we know why they call them Smart Guns."

The first Follies were performed in 1976. While the event is billed as
comic relief from the session, it has a serious purpose. This year's event
raised between $3,000 and $4,000 dollars for a Washington College
scholarship fund.

"I thought it was pretty tame compared to other years," said Del. Richard
La Vay (R-Dist.15) of Germantown. "I thought it was funny and since I had
something to do with the writing, I enjoyed it.

"The people in the follies take their jobs seriously but not themselves.
You want those kind of people in office."

Former Baltimore County Del. Lawrence A. Lamotte opened the show with a
quip about this year's drop in ticket price from $20 to $10: "I hope the
reduction in ticket price is not a reflection on tonight's talent."

Prince George's District County Judge Gerard F. Devlin followed with a
series of lawyer jokes.

"What do you call a lawyer with a 50 IQ?" Devlin queried the audience.
"Your Honor!"

"What do you call a lawyer that's gone bad?" "Senator," he replied.

Audience favorites included Barve, Del. Wendell F. Phillips (D-Dist.41) of
Baltimore, Del. Melony G. Griffith (D-Dist.25) of Suitland and Sen. Ida G.
Ruben (D-Dist.20) of Silver Spring.

Ruben brought the house down with a song-and-dance number with the
Rubenettes. Her leggy costume featured a showgirl tux and tails and fishnet
stockings.

"Considering that we didn't have time to rehearse we did fabulous," Ruben
said. "I thought the script was great and it was done the night before. I
hope everybody takes the puns well."

Barve performed his rendition of Kumar The Magnificent, a takeoff on Johnny
Carson's Great Carnac act.

"One Maryland is the answer," Kumar the Magnificent said, holding a sealed
envelope to his forehead. "That's the answer."

The question? "What does Del. John A. Giannetti (D-Dist. 13B of Laurel) see
when he stops drinking?"

"Dead on arrival is the answer," went another answer. The question: "What
is the status of all my bills after this stupid skit?"

"It was funnier than usual," said House Majority leader John A. Hurson
(D-Dist. 18) of Chevy Chase. "They did a wonderful job. Of course, I'm
suing them for defamation."