SCHOOL SEX AND DRUG SURVEY ANGERS 6TH GRADERS' PARENTS

NEW MILFORD, Conn., May 25 -- School officials here
apologized today to parents who were outraged by a health survey,
given to some students as young as 11, that posed specific questions
about sexual orientation and behavior, drug and alcohol use and other
intimate details. The survey, intended to assess the effectiveness of
the district's health classes, asked students a broad range of
questions, including whether they were gay or bisexual, or had
contemplated suicide, used cocaine or engaged in oral or group sex.

"I am appalled," said Betty Najm, who said her 11-year-old daughter
was perplexed by many of the questions about sexuality.

"She didn't know what bisexual meant.

It's not taught in the health curriculum."

Nor should it be, she said.

"Leave it up to the parents and let them decide how to teach
it."

Taking full responsibility for the survey, the assistant school
superintendent, Thomas Mulvihill, apologized this morning to more than
60 parents who crowded into a conference room at the Schaghticoke
Middle School for an emotional meeting. But many irate parents in this
town eight miles north of Danbury in rural western Connecticut said
the apology was insufficient.

"I want resignations," said Tiffany Libardi, a parent who left the
meeting still fuming. "What I personally asked twice was for the
resignations of everyone involved in the perversion of this."

At the meeting, Mr. Mulvihill promised to write a letter of apology to
all parents, which would be distributed with final report cards next
week.

In an interview later, he said the 95-question survey, which included
questions about nutrition and mental health, was intended to measure
the success of the health curriculum.

"Our curriculum is a very conservative curriculum," he said. "It
basically preaches abstention from everything."

He said health instructors wanted to know if students were using the
refusal skills and other lessons taught in class.

The survey was given during classes last week to all 400 sixth
graders, 400 eighth graders and 1,200 high school students. Mr.
Mulvihill said there had been no complaints about the survey at the
high school.

But officials decided on Wednesday to stop administering it after
receiving complaints from parents of students at the middle school,
where 11-year-old sixth graders were among those asked whether they
had AIDS, smoked cigarettes or had ever brought a weapon to school.

Several parents said they most objected to a question asking, "Have
you ever had oral sex, either fellatio (mouth touching penis) or
cunnilingus (mouth touching vagina)?"

They also complained about the drug questions.

"They have listed every drug known to man," Mrs. Libardi said. "It's
almost like they are planting seeds. Did you know you can sniff paint?
I have paint in the garage."

One parent, Loretta Perri, said the survey "took away our children's
innocence."

Anonymous questionnaires delving into students' personal lives have
become common nationwide, as educators seek to understand and prevent
school shootings and other incidents.

Some view the surveys as a way to identify undesirable behavior,
particularly in light of the criticism school officials have faced
when problems that were undetected or ignored exploded in violence.

But many parents have complained that the surveys are intrusive and
provide children with an almanac of bad behavior.

Federal law requires school districts to obtain written parental
permission before requiring students to participate in any survey or
analysis paid for with federal money that asks about sexual behavior
and attitudes; illegal, antisocial or demeaning behavior; or critical
appraisals of family relationships.

The federal Department of Education, which enforces the law, is
investigating complaints by four parents in Ridgewood, N.J., about a
survey of 2,100 junior high and high school students last fall that
asked similar questions about sex, drinking and drug use.

School officials there said they had complied with the law by sending
parents a letter notifying them of the survey, informing them of the
nature of the questions and making clear that the survey was voluntary
and anonymous.

In the New Milford schools, which used federal money for the survey,
officials said they, too, had sent a letter home telling parents about
the survey and stressing that it was anonymous.

But many parents complained that they never saw the letter, and that
it had been sent home with the children rather than mailed, as other
important notices have been.

The letter told parents they could request, in writing, that their
children not participate. It broadly described the scope of the
survey, but did not warn that some questions would be explicit.

Mr. Mulvihill, the assistant superintendent, said the middle school
survey results would not be used.