HEAD'S GUIDE TO THE NOVEMBER ERECTION

Dear friends, it won't be long now. Before you know it there will be
mini-vans with Iowa plates driving 3-mph down main street looking for a
place with bottomless glasses of sweet tea and apres ski lounge singing to
soothe the soul.

YES, IT'S CROWDED HERE BUT IT COULD BE BETTER

As you maybe have heard, for the second straight year, Breckenridge is the
most visited ski resort in North America. But according to the folks at Vail
Resorts, if we don't build more trophy homes, we're screwed.

The Head was choking down some free appetizer shrimp at a reception hosted
by the VR talking heads when they whined that if they are not allowed to
screw up peaks 7 and 8 with ritzy lodges, lifts, and mansions, we will no
longer be crowded to the point of insanity.

The head listened in rapture as some Realtor with his sweater tucked into
his Dockers used scare tactics to sway the audience into believing that if
the resorts don't get their way WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE! The Head did manage
to suck down plenty of draft beer and stale chips as the propaganda flowed
like sewage.

BEER BRATWURST AND BAVARIAN FACISTS

Here's a contradiction. While the conservative right-wingers are predicting
total moral ruin for society if the Medical Marijuana Initiative passes in
November, towns all over Colorado are hosting October Fests. Well, that's a
great message for kids. Pot to fight the effects of chemotherapy is bad, but
putting on leather shorts, dancing to bad music and drinking in the street
to the point of puking is good.

Don't get me wrong, the head is not afraid of projectile purging, but I do
need some bud for my glaucoma.

CAN YOU FEEL MY LOVE?

I've been getting a lot of hate e-mail bashing me for my negativity. They
are right, I suck. But, let it never be said that I don't love!

What follows are local luminaries who I love: Breckenridge MAYOR MAMULAR,
Green Council guy JIM LAMB, Frisco Councilperson JON KREAMELMEYER, Evil
empire spin doctor JIM FELTON, Top Cop and thug-buster JOE MORALEZ. I love
those guys!

Sorry, I can't leave it there. These are some folks who I think should be
molested by a biker gang: Biff America, because he would enjoy that, the
State Board of Realtors, most of the cops in Breck, all of the cops in
Frisco and Silverthorne, the entire "Rape the Nordic Center" Addams family,
Cucumber Casey, "Bury the Bones" Currin, most Golfers and all Snowmobilers.

Thanks, I feel better now.

VOTE, AND VOTE OFTEN

Don't let those blood suckers in the real estate industry confuse the issue.
Vote yes on Amendment 24 - the responsible growth initiative.

The developers and Realtors don't want it because they will make a little
less money, the County Commissioners don't want it because they will have to
work a little harder, the Governor doesn't want it because he is a moron.

If you don't want to lose every square inch of open space in the towns, the
county and the state, VOTE YESS ON AMENDMENT 24! Can I get a witness!

VOTE THIS WAY OR "WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE"

The following is the Head's political endorsements for the November
Erection. Please, please, please, please don't vote for George "Dubya" Bush
and Dick Chaney. We need another Bush and Dick in the White House like I
need a pair of shoes.

For PRESIDENT I like Ralph Nader because he's a rabble rouser. We've never
had a president with the name of Ralph, isn't it about time.

AMENDMENT 24: Responsible Growth Initiative. You know those blowed dried
Realtors with their SUVs? And you know those rich developers who have been
killing wildlife and paving the wilderness and nordic centers? And do you
know those deadbeat politicos who go golfing with all those developers and
Realtors? All those people don't want Amendment 24 - that, my friends, is
reason enough for the Head to say YES ON 24 !

AMENDMENT 20: the "dreaded" Medical Marijuana question. You know the Head
supports the use of Marijuana for medical purposes only. Use it all the
time. Nuff said. VOTE 4 "20."

AMENDMENT 22: Background checks at Gun shows. Since I ain't got no trigger
finger I really don't want a bunch of morons to be able to 'pack heat.'
Don't see what's wrong with that. I'd say VOTE YES ON 22.

AMENDMENT 25: Consent to abortion. This bill intentionally slows up the
process for a woman's right to choose. If you don't like abortions, don't
have one. VOTE NO ON AMENDMENT 25, you 51 percent of the population.

On the local Scumbag County ballot there are a couple of initiatives that
bear scrutiny.

Ya'all in Frisco: Aren't you sick and tired of paying taxes? Then get on out
there and vote NO on the new tax in Frisco. Who needs more Corvette shows!
We still got Wally World paying the bills.

What's this? Nobody knows what the County Commissioners do all day anyway,
but here they are go spending all their time we pay for trying to sneak
themselves into the question of whether to give the assessor and the sheriff
a break with term limits. The thing has been voted down twice in Summit
County already! It's like we got Slobodan Milosevic for County Commissioner.

Just for that, vote NO on allowing for another term of office for the
commissioners. Why don't they do something productive like putting medicinal
cannabis on the ballot instead of making poor sick people petition in the
streets, or how about the commissioners put a perfect growth initiative on
the ballot for us. Vote YES if you think they are all a bunch of crappy jobs
anyway.

But don't get the wrong idea, you don't have to do everything the Head says.
Like drink formaldehyde. Just do us all a favor, if you're gonna wait till
the last day before the election and then make up your mind based on the
commercials you watch on TV the night before, stay home! We don't need ya
messing it up at the polls.

Well worms, time for the head to roll off to Buffalo.

Have a nice October, but don't forget, "all your private property, is
targets for your enemies." Don't die.

Love, The Head

Send hate mail to the Head at: freedom@colorado.net - We'll pass it on.