TILTING AT WINDMILLS IN BERKELEY

When Kevin Sabet arrived at the University of California at Berkeley four
years ago, the campus was crawling with beer drinkers, pot smokers and
dabblers in strange, psychedelic drugs.

Today, well, today it's pretty much the same, though Sabet did give
changing it the old college try.

A few days into his freshman year, Sabet founded Citizens for a Drug-Free
Berkeley, an organization that seemed to hold as much promise as the
Coalition for a Wine-Free France.

With no outside funding, he took to the pulpit, proselytizing at parties,
showing up at nightclubs with photocopies of CAT scans of the human brain
on ecstasy.

Sabet could be a downer to anyone on uppers. And his wasn't just a
campus-wide campaign.

Among his prime targets were cannabis clubs, which Sabet regarded as
outgrowths of the city's "pro-drug mentality."

"With alcohol and tobacco, it's already too late. They've already seeped
into the fabric of our culture," Sabet says. "There's still time to stop
that from happening with marijuana and other drugs." There weren't many
citizens in Citizens for a Drug-Free Berkeley, which helps explain, Sabet
says, why the Berkeley City Council didn't like to hear him speak.

"City politicians are spineless," Sabet says. "I didn't expect them to
stand up on principle if it went against the majority of their constituents."

Sabet still hopes the city will pass strong anti-pot club legislation - a
timely follow-up, he says, to a recent Supreme Court decision that dealt a
setback to the clubs.

As for folks at City Hall, many probably hope that Sabet will go away,
which he will.

Next month, he's moving to Atlanta to work for a group called National
Families in Action. Then - surprise! - he'll go for a degree in law and
public policy.

"Yes, I'm leaving Berkeley, but don't worry," Sabet says. "Wherever I go,
I'll be keeping a close eye on all of you."

- -- CITIZEN JANE: But what about Citizens for a Drug-Free Berkeley? In
Sabet's absence, is its future as cloudy as the bottom of a billowing bong?
No way, says Sabet. Sure, the group will go dormant this summer. But Sabet
is working on appointing his successor, a woman so prominent that he dare
not mention her name.

"She's very well-known," Sabet says. "She's also very worried about the
backlash she'll suffer if she takes the post."

- -- WHO LET THE DOG OUT?: It's not backlash but whiplash that one worries
about when it comes to Jesse Lane, an Oakland biker who tools around on his
Harley with his dog, Houdini, strapped to his lap. Lately, he's been
carrying another piece of cargo - a video camera, so Lane can shoot footage
for a music video called "Biker Dog." The eponymous song already has been
written, by Lane, of course. It's a softly rocking ditty - "Well, he's been
ridin' since he's was 6 weeks old/He's tough as leather but he's got a
heart of gold" - that you can hear by tuning in to www.dogsonbikes.com.

- -- A DAY AT THE BEACH: These days most rockers ride around on golf carts.
Take Huey Lewis, who'll be in Livermore later this summer for the Wente
Vineyards golf and concert series.

Devin Meheen, head pro at Wente, used to work in Palm Springs, where he
gave Lewis a few swing tips.

"He's a pretty solid player," Meheen says. "I'd say about a 12-handicap
back then."

The same can't be said for the Beach Boys, who play at Wente June 18. True
to their name, they spend most of their time in the sand.

- -- SILVER AND BLACK AND GREEN: Same goes for Raiders wide receiver James
Jett, who teed it up last week with teammate Tim Brown at Monarch Bay golf
course in San Leandro. On-course spies say that Brown's game was
respectable. But Jett's shots were less predictable than Jon Gruden's play
calling.

- -- THE PEN IS MIGHTIER: Here's something else you wouldn't predict: a
doctor who actually returns your phone calls.

That's Dr. Arlan Cohn of Berkeley, who makes a point of responding to every
phone message, often within the same calendar year. Cohn is unusual in
another respect. He writes humorous essays, under the pseudonym Oscar
London, that poke fun at the conventions of the medical world. His latest
work is "From Voodoo to Viagra: The Magic of Medicine" (Ten Speed Press,
$14.95), a collection of 37 light-hearted essays. At a recent reading at
Cody's bookstore in Berkeley, Cohn handed out 100 Viagra pens. According to
Cohn, the only problem with owning the pen is envy. Get it? Other men get
jealous of how it writes.

Not to worry: the essays are plenty more clever than that.