KEEPING KIDS OFF DRUGS STARTS AT HOME

The home is one of the most powerful places to teach a child. I, along with
my husband, James, have been raising children for 26 years. We have 10
children (six are adopted). Foster parenting for 15 years, I believe our
community has fantastic parents that care for their children well and are
concerned about what goes on with them. I have come to realize that we as
parents have a serious problem at hand -- keeping our children off of
tobacco, alcohol and other drugs.

About 3 1/2 years ago a parent I know told me that he didn't have a problem
with his children using marijuana. If one of his children wanted to try it,
he would just go out and get it for them. Being that I was a foster parent,
he told me, I had to make sure my children stayed away from drugs.

The problem for me was: My children go to that house frequently.

That was my wake-up call to the fight I was up against. As hurtful as that
was, I had to realize I have to protect my children as much as I could --
even if it cost me some relationships.

I have wondered why when our children are young, we teach them not to touch
the stove, place protectors in electrical sockets, tell them not to cross
the street before looking both ways, and demand that they not talk to or
get in a car of a stranger. The list of things we do to protect our
children from harm is endless. Why not a similar message about drugs and
alcohol?

Also, why is it that when our precious, little darlings misbehave at school
- -- and the school is justified in correcting them -- we go to the school
and verbally attack the teacher and school administration instead of
helping the child and the school in correcting the bad behavior? This is
sending a terrible message to the child. This is only one situation that
will start negative behavior.

We have to teach our children right from wrong by setting a good example
ourselves. Establish open communication. Make a point to spend time with
your child. Activities to share include walks, bowling, roller-skating,
bike rides, quiet dinners out or cookie-baking sessions.

Understand that your child is growing up. This doesn't mean a hands- off
attitude. Guide your child's behavior. Know who their friends are. Set
rules, and be consistent. We all want our youth to have fun, be healthy and
have safe interaction with their peers.

Even if chances are that our youth may try tobacco, alcohol and other
drugs, we still need to educate them of the health dangers and
consequences. I have talked to parents and teens on this very subject. A
lot of teens are not using tobacco, alcohol and other drugs. To those
teens, I thank you, for you are setting a good example for other teens.
Other responses from parents and teens were more disheartening, such as:

* Everyone is doing it.

* My children don't smoke cigarettes or marijuana all the time.

* I supply my children with cigarettes and alcohol to keep them from
getting it in the streets.

* I get high with my parents; they don't have a problem with it.

It's insane how illegal behavior is being justified even at the hands of
parents. Young people mimic the behavior of people they care about. If we
don't teach our children to obey the laws of our country, how do we expect
them to respect us and everyone around them?

In most cases the use of alcohol and other drugs are the reason for
problems in our schools. We will never stop the use of tobacco, alcohol and
other drugs among our youth, but we can slow it down. The time is now for
parents and the community to stand up with a strong voice and teach our
youth why using alcohol, tobacco and other drugs is a bad behavior practice
that can affect their future. We, as parents, should work together, not
against each other, to keep our children away from drugs.

I don't have the answer to what can turn this epidemic among our youth
around. I do know we, as parents, have to start somewhere. And that place
is one of the most powerful places to teach a child -- our home.