A MOTHER'S HEARTBREAK

Janet's two boys were smart, good looking kids. Model material, she
called them. They had good jobs, a home, cars and all the toys boys
like, such as XBoxes. One of them was even a new father.

"Three years ago I could say that they were normal kids," said Janet.

But over the past couple of years the boys lost all of that.

Their cars and possessions were pawned off, their good looks were
gradually eaten away and now when they're not on the streets, home
sweet home to them is the cold confines of prison.

All of it was lost to drugs.

A combination of crystal meth, crack and heroin caused their worlds
to come crashing down.

"Their lives are just passing them by, all for drugs."

But the young men aren't the only ones who have lost so much. Their
drug addictions have also forced their family, including Janet, to
distance themselves from the 24- and 28-year-old boys.

Every Christmas, birthday, holiday and even funerals are a harsh
reminder to Janet of what she too has lost.

"I just cry all the time. It breaks my heart that I don't have my
boys in my life because of drugs."

Although she now knows not to blame herself, Janet can't help but
ask: "What did I do wrong? What could I have done differently?"

Like any mother, Janet tried to do everything she could to help her
sons. She opened her heart, her home and her wallet to them numerous times.

But what she didn't realize at the time was that she was also enabling them.

"Both of the kids I've let three times live with me and I gave them a
chance and all of the times I've literally caught them red-handed
doing drugs in the house."

Even when Janet wasn't giving them a hand out, they would take from her anyway.

"My one son stole all my mom's jewelry to get money for drugs and
she's still shattered about it."

The drug use also twisted the boys from their former kind selves.

"Here they are living in my house and I'd ask them nicely to do
something and they'd just snap at me," said Janet, of the grumpy
behaviour that was frequent when they were off the drugs.

The drugs also brought sleepless nights, delusions and paranoia into
their lives.

"They would phone me up and tell me that there was someone trying to
kill them and you know what? It might have been true."

Their appearance also dwindled to a point where Janet couldn't even
identify her own flesh and blood.

"We came home one day and (one of the boys) was passed out on the
lawn, we didn't even recognize him."

Meth transformed them and now they are skinny, aged looking, their
faces are full of scabs and scars and their once beautiful smiles are
yellow and rotting.

"From how they used to be with their hair and their cologne to just
not caring about anything, it's pretty sad."