News (Media Awareness Project) - Nigeria: Cannabis Smoking - Nigerian Addicts On The Rise |
Title: | Nigeria: Cannabis Smoking - Nigerian Addicts On The Rise |
Published On: | 2006-12-28 |
Source: | Nigerian Tribune (Nigeria) |
Fetched On: | 2008-01-12 18:50:04 |
CANNABIS SMOKING - NIGERIAN ADDICTS ON THE RISE
Despite the efforts of the National Drug Law Enforcement Agency
(NDLEA) at curbing the increase in the use and sales of marijuana, it
seems more people are getting addicted to it, writes Kunle Awosiyan.
NIGERIA's booming marijuana trade is more than the National Drug Law
Enforcement Agency (NDLEA) can handle, Commander Okey Ihebom, the
agency's commander in Edo state, a centre of the trade, told a major
newspaper last week. An undermanned, under-equipped, and
under-budgeted anti-drug agency can't compete with rising domestic
and international demand and few other economic options for northern
farmers, he said. In its 2006 International Narcotics Control
Strategy Report, the US State Department noted that
"marijuana/cannabis is grown all over Nigeria, but mainly in central
and northern states. Cultivation is generally on small fields in
remote areas. Its market is concentrated in West Africa and Europe;
none is known to have found its way to the United States. However,
domestic use is becoming more widespread. The NDLEA has destroyed
marijuana fields, but has no regular, organized eradication programme
in place. There are no reliable figures to determine cr! op size and
yields."
"The drug war in this part of the country is higher than any other
place because, essentially, Edo state is a home for the cultivation
of cannabis," Commander Ihebom said. "They plant Indian hemp in large
quantity in this state. The cannabis being produced in Edo and Ondo
states is the best in the world. So, there is a ready market for it
anywhere in the world. We also understand that the cannabis from
those two states is more expensive. The producers and the peddlers
are therefore willing to take any type of risk to produce and export
the drugs."
The state only has one vehicle for marijuana law enforcement and no
good jail, Ihebom complained, and farmers have been known to fight
back. "You cannot get a vehicle that can carry you to such farms. The
farms are not accessible by any form of vehicle. You will drive into
the forest and stop about 20 kilometers away from the farm and trek
to the place," he explained. "At the farms, the farmers are mostly
armed. They know the area better than us. After an exchange of fire,
when we overpower them, we make arrest and commence the destruction
of the farms. It will take us days to destroy a large farm. At times,
they will regroup and fight us back with sophisticated weapons. That
was how the command lost two of its men recently."
It also lacks an effective prevention campaign. "People smoke
cannabis out of ignorance," Ihebom said. "When we enlighten the
public on the adverse effect of smoking the drug, I am sure a good
number of people will stop the habit and those that are not in the
habit of smoking will report to us those they see smoking." While
Ihebom emphasized violence linked to the marijuana trade, he conceded
that wasn't always the case, but he worried that the inflow of money
to the impoverished region would be harmful. "The perception that
cannabis producing or consuming communities are violent, may not be
entirely true. Look at Ondo, a leading cannabis producing state in
the country and yet it is a peaceful state," he said. "But when you
consider the inflow of cash from both within and abroad into cannabis
producing communities, you realize that the cash flow encourages
crime. That is exactly the case in Edo state. You know because of
drug peddling and this international! prostitution, there is a lot of
money here and so crime rate is also very high."
The late Afro Beat legend, Fela Anikulapo-Kuti never hid his love for
marijuana. Despite brushes with law enforcement agents, Fela kept on
smoking it, praising to the high heavens the efficacy and potency in
the banned drug as performance enhancer. After the body of the
legend Afro beat musician was laid to rest, his children began to
pick his legacies to revamp the lyrics of his unique song. The birth
of the African shrine by his first son, Femi, within Agidingbi, Ikeja
marked the beginning of Fela's immortality. Fela was not only known
as an artist but also as an addicted smoker of cannabis, a legacy
Femi would not like to inherit. During Fela's lifetime, most people
trooped to his shrine to smoke marijuana, a secret that was not
really revealed to Femi. He erected a giant structure and forbade the
smoking of Indian hemp. In the beginning, it was all songs and no
smoking. Gradually, he started losing customers and had no option
than to allow smokers.
At present, smokers of cannabis, cocaine, heroin and opium have
turned the African shrine to their second homes. For passersby who
can perceive the odour of marijuana, it always fills the air,
especially at night. Within the shrine, a gram of marijuana is sold
between N25 and N30. Mid-week Tribune learnt that the cost of
cannabis reduces as the quantity demanded increases. The sale of hard
drugs is not hidden in the area. People sell cocaine and opium
without fear that the police may come round. Investigation revealed
that a gram of cocaine is sold between N1,500 and N2,000. A journey
by Mid-week Tribune to the shrine last week showed that policemen
hardly interfere in the smokers' affairs.
It is not only at the shrine that smokers parade themselves, in most
nooks and crannies of the state, they freely engage in their
nefarious activities. In fact, marijuana has gained popularity like
cigarette. In spite of its psychological effect, some addicted
smokers still believe that cannabis is a good herb. A smoker who
refused to give his name once told Mid-week Tribune that he took
Indian hemp whenever he felt like flying. According to him, cannabis
cools the brain and makes the smoker to think extraordinarily. "Your
thinking becomes supernatural and makes every creature looks very
small to you. At that time, you regard yourself as the best thing
ever created and you can fly in the spiritual realm," he added.
However, an ex-addict, Mr. Jide Ajagunna said that this
extraordinary thinking of an addicted smoker is the beginning of
insanity, which, if not stopped, might lead to permanent madness.
Ajagunna, who is now the Communication Director of Goodwork! er
Movement International, a non-governmental organisation that
rehabilitates drug addicts, revealed that marijuana and other hard
drugs could only lead to mental retardation and nothing more.
According to him, the effect of smoking is determined by the
physiology of the smoker. He said, "some people smoke for the first
time and run mad while some run mad after a long period of addictive
smoking." He explained that a cocaine smoker becomes addicted after
four weeks of regular smoking and might find it difficult to quit the
habit. As he put it, "cocaine and other narcotics are more
psychoactive than marijuana but almost all drug abusers in Nigeria
have, at a time, smoked Indian hemp because it is cheap and can
serve as a good alternative to the expensive narcotics. Smokers
graduate from cannabis to narcotics." Almost all hoodlums on Lagos
streets are cannabis smokers and this is clearly demonstrated by
their level of sanity. To a street boy, smoking is a s! ign of
civilisation or maturity but to a sane human being, it! is a de ad
wrong habit. The increasing number of mad people in Lagos has however
been traced to drug abuse.
In his comment, the Executive Director of the Goodworker Movement
International, Pastor Tunji Agboola, said not less than 10, 000
Lagosians have been exposed to drug abuse. He said some of them had
been admitted into his rehabilitation centre. According to him,
about 75 drug addicts are now at the Goodworker's rehabilitation
centre out of which 45 of them were marijuana smokers. He stated that
there are many drug addicts who live on the streets and are
mentally-retarded and who could cause havoc, especially during this
period of intense politicking. This might be true as most politicians
now move with thugs who smoke Indian hemp indiscriminately at every
political rally. They do not care. They are ready to destroy, kill
or maim people while on drugs. According to Agboola, the
rehabilitation centre is established to promote mental health within
the society. "Rehabilitation is not synonymous to treatment," he
noted. As he put it, "Rehabilitation changes the h! uman behaviour
and his thinking while treatment only removes the plague that has
infected him." Speaking on how expensive it is to rehabilitate an
addict, Agboola stated that it costs a lot of money, adding that an
addict spends about N40, 000 a month. However, he said that his
organisation would soon build an ultra-modern rehabilitation centre
to augment government's effort towards rehabilitating most depressed
youths in the country. To him, smokers of marijuana have caused many
road accidents while the habit had made many Nigerian youths
unproductive.
The Story of an addict:
Nathan is 20 and a recovering drug addict. He first used marijuana
when he was 12 and was a heroin addict by the time he was 16. When he
was 18, he got clean. He has been in a treatment centre and is
attending Narcotics Anonymous, a self-help group for drug addicts
that want to stay clean.
This is his story:
I came from a good family and I never wanted for anything, but what I
got was never enough - I think that was where my addictive behaviour
started from. I started getting into trouble at primary school... I
used to get bullied and then I became a bully. My mum and dad were
freaking out because their little angel had turned into someone who
just didn't care anymore.
I ended up getting chucked out of class when I was 10. I was stealing
stuff from the janitor's office and stealing sweets. My mum and dad
weren't happy at all. I left primary school and during the summer I
first took drugs with a group of local lads, we were all playing
football and everyone stopped and started rolling joints and stuff
and I smoked it and I was out of my head. I didn't enjoy it and I
didn't like the feeling. I remember running home and scrubbing my
face with a toothbrush because I hated it. So I left it for a couple
of months.
I was a bit of a loner to start with and I saw this group of older
guys I wanted to hang about with who were running about joking and
getting into trouble. My mum and dad didn't know how to control me. I
used to get a lot of positive attention when I was younger, but as
soon as I started getting into trouble, I craved attention and it
didn't bother me if it was positive or negative, as long as I was
getting attention. Eventually, I started hanging about with these
guys, I was stealing from shops and I started smoking cannabis all
the time. I was sitting in class stoned and not listening to what was
said.
I started getting suspended from school. From then I just went
downhill doing anything. I was a bit different from everyone else and
I was always looking for something and I found it in drugs, in
cannabis at that time. I went through school like that and I started
taking speed and LSD and I didn't speak to my family at this point. I
was sent to a child psychologist, I was quite glad, because I was
getting an afternoon off school. My mum and dad were freaking out -
they couldn't handle that their son was like this. The whole family
was having to see the psychologist so my older brother wasn't happy.
I went downhill - my life just revolved around drugs and stealing
from local supermarkets and stuff.
At about age 13 or 14, I was stealing from the local supermarket and
I was getting caught by the police and stuff like that. Then, I
started selling drugs at school - cannabis and amphetamines. I was
taking amphetamine at school and snorting it before I went into
class and snorting it in PE. I thought I was really cool, because
drugs had always fascinated me. I always wanted to be this cool drug
dealer or a cool bank robber. I thought by selling a couple of wraps
of speed, I was achieving my goal. So, I carried on like that and
then it was towards the end of school that I first took heroin. I
injected and then I got expelled from school for selling drugs. My
mum and dad were going mental - they couldn't handle that all their
friends knew that their son got expelled for drugs. Even then I was
not that worried - I was just worried about getting money for drugs.
The police came round to my mum and dad's house and searched it - it
was really humiliating for them, but as I said, it didn't bother me.
My face was in the local paper and I didn't care. They let me back to
do my exams and I walked back in to school in my school uniform full
of heroin, not caring about anyone. It's quite bad because my little
brother goes to that school now and he's had to go in after the
reputation that I had. I went on to college and I was taking heroin
all the time and stealing from shops, stealing computer games and
selling them, and scoring with older guys... injecting all the time.
I was going out with a lassie who found out I was injecting. We split
up and we got back together and I promised I'd stop injecting, but I
had no intention of stopping. My good mates I went to school with
started finding out I was taking heroin, so slowly but surely they
started drifting away. I just became the local junkie. I thought it
was an exciting lifestyle - it took away my feelings. Looking back,
it was just crap. I was injecting in college toilets, stealing,
sharing needles with people I didn't even know. Lots of dirty stuff.
At Christmas when I was 16 or 17, I was sitting in my bedroom with
one of my mates, injecting heroin, and my mum looked in the window
and saw me and my mate injecting. That was the first time my mum
realised I had a serious drug problem. She freaked right out and I
ran away. I was so humiliated. I thought I wanted to stop but,
subconsciously, I still wanted more. I moved into a flat in a
skyscraper and my life started going right downhill from there. I was
living next to people who sold crack cocaine, prostituted women. I
started going about with them and started using crack, doing
anything I could to get money.
I'd just turned 18 and in desperation I sought help from my mum and
dad to get into a local treatment centre. I went in there and I
couldn't admit that drugs were a problem, I could only admit that
heroin was a problem. They said I had to abstain from all drugs in
order to have a good recovery, and I thought no way, so I lied my way
through the treatment centre and came out and just started again. I
was smoking cannabis one night and the next morning I woke up and I
thought well, I'm not clean anyway, so I'll just take heroin and
I'll start clean tomorrow.
My life was an isolated world, sitting in my flat with the curtains
drawn. I was scared to go out because I thought people were after me.
A lot of it was just in my head, I was just going mad. I couldn't get
out of bed before I injected myself. My life was a mess and my body
was run down. I was well underweight. I couldn't eat. My mum and dad
thought I'd been cured so they were going mental. I was doing a lot
of crazy stuff. I was slowly and surely killing myself... my life was
crap. The final time I went back into a treatment centre, life was
that bad, I was suicidal. I was in the treatment centre for six
months. This time I surrendered. This time I chucked in the towel and
said I know my way doesn't work, show me how to do it.
In there, I learned a lot about myself I managed to get clean and
stay clean. My life just got better, slowly but surely. My family
started speaking to me, started phoning me and having good
conversations. I went out a couple of times for the weekend speaking
to them, and then I left the treatment centre. I made a lot of good
friends there - I never really had friends before, just people that I
used drugs with. This time I had good friends that I had something in
common with.
Despite the efforts of the National Drug Law Enforcement Agency
(NDLEA) at curbing the increase in the use and sales of marijuana, it
seems more people are getting addicted to it, writes Kunle Awosiyan.
NIGERIA's booming marijuana trade is more than the National Drug Law
Enforcement Agency (NDLEA) can handle, Commander Okey Ihebom, the
agency's commander in Edo state, a centre of the trade, told a major
newspaper last week. An undermanned, under-equipped, and
under-budgeted anti-drug agency can't compete with rising domestic
and international demand and few other economic options for northern
farmers, he said. In its 2006 International Narcotics Control
Strategy Report, the US State Department noted that
"marijuana/cannabis is grown all over Nigeria, but mainly in central
and northern states. Cultivation is generally on small fields in
remote areas. Its market is concentrated in West Africa and Europe;
none is known to have found its way to the United States. However,
domestic use is becoming more widespread. The NDLEA has destroyed
marijuana fields, but has no regular, organized eradication programme
in place. There are no reliable figures to determine cr! op size and
yields."
"The drug war in this part of the country is higher than any other
place because, essentially, Edo state is a home for the cultivation
of cannabis," Commander Ihebom said. "They plant Indian hemp in large
quantity in this state. The cannabis being produced in Edo and Ondo
states is the best in the world. So, there is a ready market for it
anywhere in the world. We also understand that the cannabis from
those two states is more expensive. The producers and the peddlers
are therefore willing to take any type of risk to produce and export
the drugs."
The state only has one vehicle for marijuana law enforcement and no
good jail, Ihebom complained, and farmers have been known to fight
back. "You cannot get a vehicle that can carry you to such farms. The
farms are not accessible by any form of vehicle. You will drive into
the forest and stop about 20 kilometers away from the farm and trek
to the place," he explained. "At the farms, the farmers are mostly
armed. They know the area better than us. After an exchange of fire,
when we overpower them, we make arrest and commence the destruction
of the farms. It will take us days to destroy a large farm. At times,
they will regroup and fight us back with sophisticated weapons. That
was how the command lost two of its men recently."
It also lacks an effective prevention campaign. "People smoke
cannabis out of ignorance," Ihebom said. "When we enlighten the
public on the adverse effect of smoking the drug, I am sure a good
number of people will stop the habit and those that are not in the
habit of smoking will report to us those they see smoking." While
Ihebom emphasized violence linked to the marijuana trade, he conceded
that wasn't always the case, but he worried that the inflow of money
to the impoverished region would be harmful. "The perception that
cannabis producing or consuming communities are violent, may not be
entirely true. Look at Ondo, a leading cannabis producing state in
the country and yet it is a peaceful state," he said. "But when you
consider the inflow of cash from both within and abroad into cannabis
producing communities, you realize that the cash flow encourages
crime. That is exactly the case in Edo state. You know because of
drug peddling and this international! prostitution, there is a lot of
money here and so crime rate is also very high."
The late Afro Beat legend, Fela Anikulapo-Kuti never hid his love for
marijuana. Despite brushes with law enforcement agents, Fela kept on
smoking it, praising to the high heavens the efficacy and potency in
the banned drug as performance enhancer. After the body of the
legend Afro beat musician was laid to rest, his children began to
pick his legacies to revamp the lyrics of his unique song. The birth
of the African shrine by his first son, Femi, within Agidingbi, Ikeja
marked the beginning of Fela's immortality. Fela was not only known
as an artist but also as an addicted smoker of cannabis, a legacy
Femi would not like to inherit. During Fela's lifetime, most people
trooped to his shrine to smoke marijuana, a secret that was not
really revealed to Femi. He erected a giant structure and forbade the
smoking of Indian hemp. In the beginning, it was all songs and no
smoking. Gradually, he started losing customers and had no option
than to allow smokers.
At present, smokers of cannabis, cocaine, heroin and opium have
turned the African shrine to their second homes. For passersby who
can perceive the odour of marijuana, it always fills the air,
especially at night. Within the shrine, a gram of marijuana is sold
between N25 and N30. Mid-week Tribune learnt that the cost of
cannabis reduces as the quantity demanded increases. The sale of hard
drugs is not hidden in the area. People sell cocaine and opium
without fear that the police may come round. Investigation revealed
that a gram of cocaine is sold between N1,500 and N2,000. A journey
by Mid-week Tribune to the shrine last week showed that policemen
hardly interfere in the smokers' affairs.
It is not only at the shrine that smokers parade themselves, in most
nooks and crannies of the state, they freely engage in their
nefarious activities. In fact, marijuana has gained popularity like
cigarette. In spite of its psychological effect, some addicted
smokers still believe that cannabis is a good herb. A smoker who
refused to give his name once told Mid-week Tribune that he took
Indian hemp whenever he felt like flying. According to him, cannabis
cools the brain and makes the smoker to think extraordinarily. "Your
thinking becomes supernatural and makes every creature looks very
small to you. At that time, you regard yourself as the best thing
ever created and you can fly in the spiritual realm," he added.
However, an ex-addict, Mr. Jide Ajagunna said that this
extraordinary thinking of an addicted smoker is the beginning of
insanity, which, if not stopped, might lead to permanent madness.
Ajagunna, who is now the Communication Director of Goodwork! er
Movement International, a non-governmental organisation that
rehabilitates drug addicts, revealed that marijuana and other hard
drugs could only lead to mental retardation and nothing more.
According to him, the effect of smoking is determined by the
physiology of the smoker. He said, "some people smoke for the first
time and run mad while some run mad after a long period of addictive
smoking." He explained that a cocaine smoker becomes addicted after
four weeks of regular smoking and might find it difficult to quit the
habit. As he put it, "cocaine and other narcotics are more
psychoactive than marijuana but almost all drug abusers in Nigeria
have, at a time, smoked Indian hemp because it is cheap and can
serve as a good alternative to the expensive narcotics. Smokers
graduate from cannabis to narcotics." Almost all hoodlums on Lagos
streets are cannabis smokers and this is clearly demonstrated by
their level of sanity. To a street boy, smoking is a s! ign of
civilisation or maturity but to a sane human being, it! is a de ad
wrong habit. The increasing number of mad people in Lagos has however
been traced to drug abuse.
In his comment, the Executive Director of the Goodworker Movement
International, Pastor Tunji Agboola, said not less than 10, 000
Lagosians have been exposed to drug abuse. He said some of them had
been admitted into his rehabilitation centre. According to him,
about 75 drug addicts are now at the Goodworker's rehabilitation
centre out of which 45 of them were marijuana smokers. He stated that
there are many drug addicts who live on the streets and are
mentally-retarded and who could cause havoc, especially during this
period of intense politicking. This might be true as most politicians
now move with thugs who smoke Indian hemp indiscriminately at every
political rally. They do not care. They are ready to destroy, kill
or maim people while on drugs. According to Agboola, the
rehabilitation centre is established to promote mental health within
the society. "Rehabilitation is not synonymous to treatment," he
noted. As he put it, "Rehabilitation changes the h! uman behaviour
and his thinking while treatment only removes the plague that has
infected him." Speaking on how expensive it is to rehabilitate an
addict, Agboola stated that it costs a lot of money, adding that an
addict spends about N40, 000 a month. However, he said that his
organisation would soon build an ultra-modern rehabilitation centre
to augment government's effort towards rehabilitating most depressed
youths in the country. To him, smokers of marijuana have caused many
road accidents while the habit had made many Nigerian youths
unproductive.
The Story of an addict:
Nathan is 20 and a recovering drug addict. He first used marijuana
when he was 12 and was a heroin addict by the time he was 16. When he
was 18, he got clean. He has been in a treatment centre and is
attending Narcotics Anonymous, a self-help group for drug addicts
that want to stay clean.
This is his story:
I came from a good family and I never wanted for anything, but what I
got was never enough - I think that was where my addictive behaviour
started from. I started getting into trouble at primary school... I
used to get bullied and then I became a bully. My mum and dad were
freaking out because their little angel had turned into someone who
just didn't care anymore.
I ended up getting chucked out of class when I was 10. I was stealing
stuff from the janitor's office and stealing sweets. My mum and dad
weren't happy at all. I left primary school and during the summer I
first took drugs with a group of local lads, we were all playing
football and everyone stopped and started rolling joints and stuff
and I smoked it and I was out of my head. I didn't enjoy it and I
didn't like the feeling. I remember running home and scrubbing my
face with a toothbrush because I hated it. So I left it for a couple
of months.
I was a bit of a loner to start with and I saw this group of older
guys I wanted to hang about with who were running about joking and
getting into trouble. My mum and dad didn't know how to control me. I
used to get a lot of positive attention when I was younger, but as
soon as I started getting into trouble, I craved attention and it
didn't bother me if it was positive or negative, as long as I was
getting attention. Eventually, I started hanging about with these
guys, I was stealing from shops and I started smoking cannabis all
the time. I was sitting in class stoned and not listening to what was
said.
I started getting suspended from school. From then I just went
downhill doing anything. I was a bit different from everyone else and
I was always looking for something and I found it in drugs, in
cannabis at that time. I went through school like that and I started
taking speed and LSD and I didn't speak to my family at this point. I
was sent to a child psychologist, I was quite glad, because I was
getting an afternoon off school. My mum and dad were freaking out -
they couldn't handle that their son was like this. The whole family
was having to see the psychologist so my older brother wasn't happy.
I went downhill - my life just revolved around drugs and stealing
from local supermarkets and stuff.
At about age 13 or 14, I was stealing from the local supermarket and
I was getting caught by the police and stuff like that. Then, I
started selling drugs at school - cannabis and amphetamines. I was
taking amphetamine at school and snorting it before I went into
class and snorting it in PE. I thought I was really cool, because
drugs had always fascinated me. I always wanted to be this cool drug
dealer or a cool bank robber. I thought by selling a couple of wraps
of speed, I was achieving my goal. So, I carried on like that and
then it was towards the end of school that I first took heroin. I
injected and then I got expelled from school for selling drugs. My
mum and dad were going mental - they couldn't handle that all their
friends knew that their son got expelled for drugs. Even then I was
not that worried - I was just worried about getting money for drugs.
The police came round to my mum and dad's house and searched it - it
was really humiliating for them, but as I said, it didn't bother me.
My face was in the local paper and I didn't care. They let me back to
do my exams and I walked back in to school in my school uniform full
of heroin, not caring about anyone. It's quite bad because my little
brother goes to that school now and he's had to go in after the
reputation that I had. I went on to college and I was taking heroin
all the time and stealing from shops, stealing computer games and
selling them, and scoring with older guys... injecting all the time.
I was going out with a lassie who found out I was injecting. We split
up and we got back together and I promised I'd stop injecting, but I
had no intention of stopping. My good mates I went to school with
started finding out I was taking heroin, so slowly but surely they
started drifting away. I just became the local junkie. I thought it
was an exciting lifestyle - it took away my feelings. Looking back,
it was just crap. I was injecting in college toilets, stealing,
sharing needles with people I didn't even know. Lots of dirty stuff.
At Christmas when I was 16 or 17, I was sitting in my bedroom with
one of my mates, injecting heroin, and my mum looked in the window
and saw me and my mate injecting. That was the first time my mum
realised I had a serious drug problem. She freaked right out and I
ran away. I was so humiliated. I thought I wanted to stop but,
subconsciously, I still wanted more. I moved into a flat in a
skyscraper and my life started going right downhill from there. I was
living next to people who sold crack cocaine, prostituted women. I
started going about with them and started using crack, doing
anything I could to get money.
I'd just turned 18 and in desperation I sought help from my mum and
dad to get into a local treatment centre. I went in there and I
couldn't admit that drugs were a problem, I could only admit that
heroin was a problem. They said I had to abstain from all drugs in
order to have a good recovery, and I thought no way, so I lied my way
through the treatment centre and came out and just started again. I
was smoking cannabis one night and the next morning I woke up and I
thought well, I'm not clean anyway, so I'll just take heroin and
I'll start clean tomorrow.
My life was an isolated world, sitting in my flat with the curtains
drawn. I was scared to go out because I thought people were after me.
A lot of it was just in my head, I was just going mad. I couldn't get
out of bed before I injected myself. My life was a mess and my body
was run down. I was well underweight. I couldn't eat. My mum and dad
thought I'd been cured so they were going mental. I was doing a lot
of crazy stuff. I was slowly and surely killing myself... my life was
crap. The final time I went back into a treatment centre, life was
that bad, I was suicidal. I was in the treatment centre for six
months. This time I surrendered. This time I chucked in the towel and
said I know my way doesn't work, show me how to do it.
In there, I learned a lot about myself I managed to get clean and
stay clean. My life just got better, slowly but surely. My family
started speaking to me, started phoning me and having good
conversations. I went out a couple of times for the weekend speaking
to them, and then I left the treatment centre. I made a lot of good
friends there - I never really had friends before, just people that I
used drugs with. This time I had good friends that I had something in
common with.
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