ENCOURAGE TEENS TO QUESTION DRUGS

It can be a challenge to know how and when to talk to your child about
drugs and alcohol. Many parents worry that bringing up the subject may
encourage their children to experiment.

Sometimes it may even feel like your teen knows more about drugs than
you do, or that you're losing influence to his or her new peer group.

Having doubts about how to parent through some of the more challenging
issues is normal, but one thing is certain -- communication and
education are vital, especially when dealing with information about
alcohol and other drugs.

Encouraging teens to ask questions is the most effective tool you
have, and may be the most important thing you can do for your child.

Research by the Alberta Alcohol and Drug Abuse Commission (AADAC)
shows teenagers are often reluctant to ask questions, as they don't
want to appear ignorant or unsophisticated. This can lead them into
social situations and actions they feel unsure about, but are too
embarrassed to avoid. Perhaps they're not sure about the effects of a
drug, and rather than ask, they decide to try it.

The fear of losing friends, popularity and self-esteem is a huge
motivator to teens and may affect their ability to say no. As a
parent, you can have a significant role in helping your kids learn the
skills to resist pressure to try drugs or alcohol.

It's important that your child understands that real friends will
respect their decisions and reassure them that doing the right thing
is sign of growing up.

By rehearsing with them many different ways to say no, you empower
them to handle uncomfortable situations and pressure they may encounter.

The National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign's Behaviour Change Expert
Panel suggests the following strategies to help your child say no.

- - Practice repeating "no," "no thanks," and "I don't want to." If the
pressure keeps up, encourage your child to walk away to a place where
he or she feels safe, perhaps with a different group of kids.

- - Reverse the pressure. "Why should I?" challenges the friend to
justify their pressure.

- - Use humour. A response like, "No thanks, I'd rather eat carpet
tacks," might just be the ticket.

- - Offer an alternative, such as "no thanks. How about we go over to my
place and play Xbox instead?" If the friend refuses, say, "Well, I'm
going home now. If you want to join me, that's where I'll be."

- - Make honest excuses. "My mom wants me to come home right after
school." Or, "I'm allergic to smoke."

"My parents would kill me if they found out, and they always find out!"

"No, I'm not into that stuff."

"I tried it once, and I hate the taste."

"My parents trust me to not drink, and I don't want to break that
trust."

Your child will need to be prepared for protests. They can meet them
with the "broken record" technique, in which they repeat their reason
for not drinking over and over until attempts at persuading them cease.

Or encourage your child to make it clear that the discussion is over
by changing the subject.

If all else fails, they should leave the scene, saying, "I've got to go."

AADAC has many proactive and effective strategies that you can use to
help your child navigate the pressures and challenges that they will
face around those using drugs and alcohol.

Ellen Percival is the publisher of Calgary's Child Magazine. Pick up
Calgary's Child Magazine free at more than 600 locations in and around
the city.