DAD NEARLY DISCONNECTED BY DRUGGIE

A Flint man should get Father of the Year for what his son recently
put him through.

The dad told police he loaned his cellphone to his crackhead son to
make a quick call in the garage.

An hour later, dad gets a call from his son's drug dealers telling him
that he needs to pay off junior's $100 drug debt if he wants his phone
back.

Dad goes to meet the dealers but starts arguing with them because they
don't have the cellphone's case.

One of the dealers pulled out a pistol and threatened to shoot dad,
before running off.

If my son ever pulls a stunt like that, I'm grounding him for
life.

Dirty Habit

A crack cocaine smoker in Flint should have eaten his losses when he
didn't get what he paid for from his dealer.

The druggie was dismayed when he got home and fired up his crack pipe,
only to discover he was the proud owner of some soap chips.

He went back to his dealer to complain but, instead of a refund
received a large pipe upside his head.

He was taken to an area hospital - where he might want to explore some
rehab opportunities.

Dazed and Confused

A Prescott woman was arrested after she tried to pull rank on police
officers in Grand Blanc.

Officers were called to a downtown gas station after the woman
allegedly pumped $11.25 in gas but only paid $1.25, said Genesee
County Prosecutor David S. Leyton.

She then told police she was an FBI agent, but when they asked for
identification she didn't have any.

In fact, she didn't even know where she was.

"Saginaw?" she asked.

Try again, said police.

"Bay City?"

Nope, they replied.

When she opened her purse to take out her license, officers noticed a
bag of marijuana and arrested her. A subsequent check of the purse
also turned up some methamphetamine.

Mixed Message

Lapeer Board of Education member John Nugent raised a few eyebrows
this week when he suggested at a board meeting that graduating seniors
keep their alcohol consumption to a minimum.

When board members chided him to not encourage any drinking, Nugent
said a beer or two at home was not a bad thing.

Frequent Offbeat contributor Jim Smith said Nugent's fellow board
member, Mike Nolan, offered Nugent some free counsel.

"If they do that, please give them my business card," said Nolan, an
attorney.

Finally, Nugent saw the light and admitted that maybe he had said too
much.