ONE WOMAN'S YEAR OF ADDICTION

Long-Term Effect Of Use Is Memory Loss

Getting ready for a night on the town, a woman who was 24 years old
and a group of her friends decided to try a drug they thought would
help them enjoy a club party.

The woman and her friends tried Ecstasy for the first time. It was
2000, and the drug was a hot commodity in California, where they lived.

The woman said the first dose of Ecstasy led her into a yearlong
addiction.

Now 30, the woman, an Oak Grove, Ky., resident, said she doesn't
regret her drug use, but only because it taught her a life lesson.

She said the long-term effect has been memory loss.

"I was shortening my life, my memory was getting real bad. ... There
would be time I wouldn't remember stuff," she said. "At times there'd
be a big gap in a sections of life. You don't know what happened, and
that's something to be concerned about."

According to Clarksville Police Department Agent David O'Dell,
Ecstasy is still popular in California and has found its way from the
eastern part of the United States and Mexico to the streets of
Clarksville.

The drug, which made a big appearance in Clarksville six years ago
then gradually died down, has "come back to Clarksville with a
vengeance," he said.

How it started

The woman, who spoke to The Leaf-Chronicle on the condition she not
be named, said she took half a pill the first time she used Ecstasy,
and 30 minutes later she started to feel the effects. She said she
got hot and came into an emotional state where she felt loved.

The high lasted all night as she danced at the club.

"I felt different," she said. "It's unexplainable. I felt like I
needed to talk and sit down. We were at the club dancing, and it just
hit me."

She said she was scared when she took the pill, because she knew it
had multiple drugs in it, including PCP, cocaine and
methamphetamine.

She took it anyway to see what would happen.

For the next year, taking Ecstasy became a habit for the then-mother
of one. She did it just to have fun, she said, and it became a social
pastime with her friends.

At first, she used it about every other weekend among her friends,
but then she started using it every weekend and at times during the
week.

The woman said the drug is highly addictive.

"It's a powerful drug. Even when you do stop, you still want to do it
every once in a while," she said. "It's very hard to stop because of
the feelings it makes you feel. You feel OK. You don't care about
anything or what people think about you. You just know right now you
feel good."

Keeping it going

At the time, Ecstasy cost about $20 a pill, depending on who she
bought it from, she said.

"It's not really a lot of money because of the effect," she said. "To
drug users, it's not a lot of money. Cocaine costs more."

The woman had a good job at a telephone company. Her parents and
co-workers didn't know about her addiction.

The woman said dealers offered options such as double- or
triple-stack pills with twice the potency.

On the outside, she said, there were no major changes, but behind
closed doors, she lived a life of addiction.

"I wasn't just doing Ecstasy," she said. "I was drinking and smoking
weed. On the weekend I was spending $200 on just getting high."

At times she didn't eat, because she knew it'd bring her high
down.

The woman and her friends researched Ecstasy and became knowledgeable
about the drug.

Smoking marijuana became a way to stop the tremors they experienced
from taking the drug, she said.

"Your body is constantly moving, and you just can't stop doing
anything," she said. "Whether your teeth chatter or you're grinding
your teeth, or bitting your tongue, your nerves are constantly moving."

She said drinking water, energy drinks and alcohol became essential
to staying alive while on Ecstasy. Being thirsty was a major side
effect, she said. She and her friends often drank orange juice as a
stimulant to keep their high, she said.

Full-blown addiction

The woman soon depended on the drug to help her deal with her
problems.

"It wasn't like my problems went away," she said. "I didn't want to
think about how I felt. I'd just went through a divorce, and it just
made me sad thinking about it. When I got high I didn't care. It
wasn't thinking about him or why we didn't work out."

Her friends thought there was nothing wrong with their drug use. She
said they didn't attend wild parties or commit crimes, but hung out
and talked about their problems.

"When you take it, you feel good," said William Hobbs, drug and
alcohol interventionist for Centerstone, the area's primary mental
health care provider. "You also can have distortions in lights, in
time and you crave tactile touch. That's why it's considered the
'love drug' -- they like to be touched."

Hobbs said the drug, which attacks the serotonin levels in the brain
that regulate emotion, can lead to severe depression and possible
suicidal thoughts among other long-term effects.

Why she quit

The woman said she decided to stop when she saw the effect the drug
was having on others. She heard about a young woman dying after
taking Ecstasy and drinking too much water.

Hobbs said it has been proven drinking too much water on Ecstasy can
cause death.

"Ecstasy can be lethal in the sense that if you drink too much water,
it increases your blood vessels and makes you retain water. If you
continue to drink, you throw your body out of whack. You can actually
die."

Hobbs said just one pill increases your chances of stroke and heart
attack.

The woman said she soon realized she was harming herself by using the
drug.

"I'm a person that never really grew up around drugs or anything, and
I know the effects it can have on people and how it can damage a
person's life," she said. "I felt like it was just time for me to
stop."

Her boyfriend and best friend helped her quit. She later stopped
smoking marijuana and drinking to excess.

The woman, who now has two children and one on the way, said she
hasn't used the drug again.

"I don't have a need for it anymore," she said. "I know what it feels
like -- that's great -- but it's not for me to do it anymore."