CRIMINALLY ILL

I've been heartened to follow the progress of the medical marijuana
bill in the Legislature but also disappointed to hear that Gov. Tim
Pawlenty has threatened to veto it. Medical marijuana could make an
enormous difference to seriously ill patients in Minnesota -- patients like me.

Since 1989, I've been fighting a rare disorder called
neurosarcoidosis, which causes my body to produce antibodies to my
own tissues, including my spinal cord and brain. My symptoms are
severe and have included sporadic paralysis in my legs and left arm;
nausea and vomiting; extreme pain in my extremities, and muscle
spasms, some of which cause me to freeze in bizarre positions because
opposing muscles contract simultaneously.

Physicians at the Mayo Clinic discovered that this disease could be
controlled by suppressing my immune system. The sporadic paralysis
I'd experienced abated and, after months of physical therapy, I was
able to walk again. But that was only the first of many battles I
would fight as the disease went from one organ or system to another,
damaging every one.

In the spring of 2001, the disease began to affect my thyroid gland.
My heart rate increased dramatically, and my digestive system sped
up, moving food through my system so fast it was largely undigested.
My body's reaction was to violently expel any food I attempted to
eat. I spent weeks in the hospital, losing about 70 of my 190 pounds.
We tried dozens of drugs, to no avail.

Finally, my doctor suggested I try marijuana. He felt that even a
small dose could relieve my nausea and potentially enable me to gain
back some of my weight.

I couldn't imagine how to obtain marijuana. The worst legal offense
I've ever committed was speeding when I was in college. Was I
supposed to go downtown to some alley in the middle of the night and
just stand there, hoping not to get shot?

Eventually, I found a friend who was able to acquire some. I was
absolutely amazed at the result.

It was unlike any of the other drugs my doctor had prescribed. Not
only did it stop my nausea, but it enabled me to eat a meal for the
first time in months.

The fact that I was breaking the law was deeply troubling, however.
In my family, we simply don't commit crimes.

Luckily, my thyroid gland eventually returned to normal, and I was
able to discontinue using marijuana, which was a relief. I hated the
whole process of dealing with an illegal drug.

The thyroid problems have returned several times, and I've had only
the occasional ability to obtain marijuana. When I had it, I could
live a functional life. When I didn't, I had to use the prescription
drugs, which basically reduced my nausea by making me sleep all the
time. How absurd that I had to make myself nearly comatose in order
to get relief!

I desperately need medical marijuana to be an option, but I'm
unwilling to move to any of the 12 medical marijuana states. I love
Minnesota. It's my home. I feel that access to medical marijuana
should be safe and controlled, and that marijuana should be available
only to patients with documented symptoms. And that's exactly what
the Minnesota legislation proposes.

It's been two years since I used marijuana, because I simply can't
stand to participate in the criminal market. I have to be at my wit's
end -- miserable to the point where my upbringing and my law-abiding
personality are trumped by my agony. No one should be forced into
that position.

The House should pass the bill, and Gov. Pawlenty should sign it into
law. I'm not the only Minnesotan counting on them to do the right thing.