TRANSCRIPT EXCERPT POLITICALLY INCORRECT MARCH 21, 2001

Panel Discussion

Bill: Thank you very much. How ya doin'? [ Cheers and applause ]

All right, what a crowd, what a night. Let us meet our panel. He is
one of the stars of "Boyz N the Hood" and "The Best Man." His new one
is "The Brothas," opening this Friday -- Morris Chestnut! Morris.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Morris: How ya doin', man?

Bill: How ya doin'?

Morris: Good to see you.

Bill: Good to see you. She is a Republican political consultant and
the former communications director for the House Education and
Workforce Committee -- my old job -- Cheri Jacobus! Cheri.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Hey, how you doin'?

Cheri: Hi.

Bill: Nice to meet you. She is the least-erotic star of the big hit
"Titus," Mondays at 9:30 on another network -- Cynthia Watros! There
it is.

[ Cheers and applause ]

How you doin'? And he currently ranks as the number-one international
icon who transcends the millennia -- wow, that's quite an intro --
and he'll be in the hot seat on this Friday's celebrity
"Millionaire," right here on ABC. The Caped Crusader, Adam West,
ladies and gentlemen! [ Cheers and applause ]

Adam. How are you?

Adam: Did you take your medicine? [ Bill chuckling ]

[ Sustained applause ]

(snip)

[ Cheers and applause ]

All right. Yesterday was the first day of spring. That is the -- I
always thought that was the season you planted. But apparently, with
marijuana, it's when it comes up. I noticed that "Nightline" is doing
drugs all this week, and I'm glad they are.

[ Laughter ]

But I saw this in the paper. It says, "Fighting Appalachia's Top Cash
Crop -- Marijuana." And it goes on to say that in Kentucky, West
Virginia and Tennessee -- which are not exactly, you know, the
liberal blue states -- this is the top cash crop. And of course, now
that it's coming up, they're trying to, like, eradicate it. They
never do. And my question is, if it's the top cash crop and so many
people want it, and the evidence is in that it doesn't hurt more
people than so many things that are legal, why are we fighting it?

Adam: Well, agriculture has not been in the best shape lately. My
farm in Appalachia is doing pretty well.

[ Laughter and applause ]

You know -- not that it might contribute anything to this discussion.
However, I heard a statistic that -- do you people realize it takes
eight bales of marijuana to give you a lethal overdose?

Bill: Are you serious?

Adam: Yes, eight bales in one day. Now, that's a lot of marijuana.
But that's true.

Bill: Wow.

Adam: It seems that harmless on one side of the coin, and yet on the
other side of the coin are --

Bill: You know, I've certainly spoken out for years in favor of
legalizing this drug, but eight bales a day, I don't know --

Adam: That's a lot, isn't it? [ Laughter ]

Bill: I think you could hurt yourself with less than eight bales. I
mean, I don't know what a bale is, but I think I've seen politicians
sitting on it.

[ Laughter ]

Adam: "Hee Haw."

Bill: Isn't a bale like a really big --

Adam: Yes, it is. Just like in a hayfield. And to have eight bales
delivered to your apartment a day --

[ Laughter ]

Suspicious thing, isn't it? [ Cheers and applause ]

Little-known fact about marijuana. Sorry to interrupt.

[ Laughter ]

Bill: I think you could die from eight bales of vitamin C, though.

[ Light laughter ]

But your point is well-taken. They've done study after study after
study. It makes you eat cookie dough. That is the worst thing --

[ Laughter ]

Cynthia: Well, I think that -- I agree with Bill that, you know, we
tried to prohibit alcohol, but that didn't work. So -- and, you know,
people are smoking pot left and right. You know, it's not just in the
Appalachian states.

Bill: Well, obviously if it's the biggest cash crop.

Cynthia: Right. And so I think that if there's any reason to just
legalize it and regulate it, like we do with alcohol. We have to
educate people. Don't let people under 21 smoke it. You can't drive a
car if you've, like, smoked it. So why not? I mean, the government, I
think, is slowly taking away our individual rights.

Cheri: No --

Cynthia: We are smart people. We can choose whether or not we want to
drink. We can choose whether or not we want to smoke pot. We can
choose whether or not we want to have an abortion.

Bill: Right, and if we screw up with it, then we pay the consequences.

Cynthia: Exactly. If we're driving with it, then we have to go to jail.

Cheri: I think that is so irresponsible.

Adam: It's a matter of personal responsibility.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Cheri: Personal irresponsibility.

Morris: You know what you have now -- I mean, now that it's legal,
you know, it'd be cheaper. But maybe with the tax cut, we didn't need
to be cheaper, right? [ Laughter ]

Cynthia: Don't go there. Don't go there.

Adam: You buy more bales with a tax cut.

Cheri: It always amazes me to hear the baby boomers talk so
nonchalantly about -- this is a drug. And just because maybe it
wasn't as harmful 25 years ago when we were coming up, what's out
there now, what the kids have now is laced with all kinds of stuff
that we didn't even know about. This is not your father's marijuana.

Bill: Oh, like you would know -- what it is laced with! [ Cheers and applause ]

You know, that is the biggest problem with the drug war. It is fought
by people who have no knowledge of it. Bernie McCaffrey, the drug
czar, didn't know what a bong was.

Cheri: So? Does that mean he can't be a responsible drug czar,
because you don't know what a bong is?

Bill: Yes, it does.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Cheri: You know what? David Crosby of Crosby, Stills and Nash
recently said about his '60s generation -- I think he has a little
bit of experience with drugs -- he says we were right that peace is
better than war. We were right that it's better to love than to hate.
But we were wrong on drugs. And he knows firsthand.

Bill: You know what? That's the other big problem with the drug war.
We base our policy on the screw-ups. David Crosby is not everyone.
He's one guy who screwed up.

Cheri: But you know what, Bill? All the kids -- we have all these
teenagers that are in drug rehab. More of them are in there for
addiction to pot than they are to alcohol. So there is a problem, and
I think --

Bill: What a lie that is! What an enormous lie! [ Cheers and applause ]

Cynthia: Look at American history. When you tell the American people
that they can't do something, they're going to do it anyway. And
they're gonna do it unhealthy, and it's just gonna cost more.

Bill: The gateway drug --

Cheri: There's a healthy way to smoke pot? Is that it? [ All talking at once ]

Cynthia: If you educate people on its effects and what to do if they
feel like they're hooked on it, yeah. You know what? I think that you
could probably -- if you choose to smoke pot -- I'd rather be
educated and smoke pot than someone who gets it off the street and it
could be laced with something.

Bill: It's not a long seminar. But --

[ Laughter ]

The gateway drug for kids, by the way, is beer, not pot. They all
drink beer first. But beer is a powerful lobby with a lot of money in
Washington. So we don't see any cries for keeping kids away from beer.

[ Cheers and applause ]

I mean, and the question stands -- how do you justify demonizing one
mood-altering drug while protecting and profiting from others?

Cheri: We do keep cigarettes and other tobacco products and alcohol
away from kids, or at least we try to. In Appalachia, in West
Virginia, where I went to college -- when I was there, the drinking
age was 18 for everything. And they changed it after I left. Not
because I left, but after I left.

[ Laughter ]

And it was a good thing that they did because we were a mess. We had
no business drinking that much at that age. And it was perfectly
legal.

Bill: But do you realize that if they made pot legal, they could keep
it away from kids better, that it actually would serve --

Cheri: What are you smoking? There's no way they could --

[ Audience ohs ]

Bill: Do you really think that one kid in America who wants marijuana
today can't get it?

Cheri: I think that if you make it real hard for them to get it,
they're gonna have a lot less of it.

Bill: Well, wait a second. We have a situation now -- it's illegal.
There's a drug war. Every kid in America who wants it gets it. How
could we be doing worse?

Cheri: They're not getting it that easily.

Bill: How could it be worse? [ Laughter and applause ]

Cheri: Look, I don't --

Bill: We have an audience tonight, 'cause it's spring break, of all
kids. These are mostly people who've been in high school recently.
Has anyone here not been able to get pot if you wanted it in high
school or college? [ Laughter ]

They're laughing. They're laughing at the question.

Cheri: You know what, though?

Bill: It's laughable to them.

Cheri: You gotta work a little harder for it.

Bill: The whole thing is laughable to them.

Cheri: I just can't imagine a situation where people that are trying
to be responsible adults in this country are gonna sit down and write
laws saying, "Okay, this is now legal because we have a few aging
baby boomers that still like doing it." And that's essentially what
the argument is.

Bill: Well, that's why we need a little more imagination in
Washington. We gotta take a break. We'll be back.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Announcer: Join us tomorrow, when our guests will be veteran TV
journalist Hugh Downs, comedian Robert Klein, ACLU President Nadine
Strossen and former Congressman James E. Rogan.

Bill: A study out yesterday said Viagra is not apparently bad for the
heart, as was thought. It might even be beneficial. And upon hearing
this, Dick Cheney said today he would do anything to help his heart.
But come on, sex? [ Cheers and applause ]

All right, we were talking about drugs. And, you know, my point
always is that the legal ones are worse than the ones that are
illegal. I was reading this story in the "Times" about a week ago.
The Oxyacanthine -- I have not heard of this drug. It's apparently
widely prescribed because it's basically the campaign finance of the
medical industry. You know, these reps come around to the doctor's
office, and they take them on vacations, they bribe them. These
doctors prescribe this. It's basically heroin. If you smash it up,
it's as powerful as heroin.

Adam: Is it good with Viagra? [ Laughter ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

Bill: It probably --

Adam: You know, Bill -- what they should do is take the users on vacation.

Bill: Yeah, and then they wouldn't need the --

Adam: That's right, they wouldn't need the doctors, and the usage would --

Bill: But, I mean, over 120 people have already died from this drug.
It's a very powerful painkiller that is widely overprescribed because
they bribe the doctors into prescribing it. And of course, we live in
a country where you can't advertise cigarettes. You can't advertise
liquor. But on TV, there's all these commercials which basically say,
"Tell your doctor you need this drug." A guy dancing on a melting
clock.

[ Laughter ]

I don't even know what the drug does, but I --

[ Applause ]

I mean, the legal drugs are so much more nefarious than the illegal
ones, aren't they?

Cynthia: Yeah, well, we're sending, you know, the occasional pot
smoker to jail, but we're promoting the drug people and the doctors
to the Bahamas when they prescribe, like, a drug that's as powerful
as heroin.

Cheri: No, we aren't. The drug companies are. And I think that any
doctor that's susceptible to that -- I mean, you can take away their
medical licenses if they have bad ethics or if they are
overprescribing and they're doing something to hurt their patients.
And that's exactly what should happen with these doctors, if that is
essentially what they're doing, and taking bribes from the
pharmaceutical companies, then they should not be doctors anymore.
It's just that it's a lot easier to identify those doctors and take
their jobs away from them than it is to get a drug kingpin in Bogata
or something like that.

Bill: No, it's not, because they don't --

Cheri: Sure it is.

Bill: No, it's -- why do you think Elvis died? Because he didn't
think he was a drug addict, because what he was doing was legal. He
was taking 11 different kinds of very strong downers every night and
going, "If I could get those pot-smokin' Beatles under arrest" --

[ Laughter and applause ]

[ All talking at once ]

Bill: Seriously. Right?

Cheri: He wasn't getting them from one doctor. If it's one doctor
that's overprescribing, then --

Bill: Right. 'Cause they're all corrupt.

Cheri: No, because what patients do that are abusing prescription
drugs is they go to several different doctors and they tell a few
lies.

Bill: Well, you don't need several for this one.

Cheri: -- to take care of it themselves.

Bill: Perdue Plommer, who made it, said "The DEA has never questioned
our marketing practices." Exactly. They never have. And that's the
problem.

[ Applause ]

We have to take a commercial. Adam, I'm so sorry. You'll have a say
when we come back.

[ Applause ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

Bill: Okay. Adam, you asked about Oxyacanthine. Oxyacanthine -- I've
never heard of it -- is more successful than Viagra. So that must be
a good drug.

Adam: Well, I'm a little tired of all the talk about painkillers
relative to different medicines and drugs. It's fine if you have a
real problem physically or even emotionally.

Bill: Right.

Adam: But I think it's a societal problem that runs very deep -- our
craving for painkillers because it's a bad day.

Bill: Well, tomorrow, we have Hugh Downs -- maybe he'll tell us about
it -- with Robert Klein and Nadine Strossen.

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Incorrect message board!

Politically Incorrect with Bill Maher

(End of Transcript)