WE'D BE DOPES NOT TO LEGALIZE POT

We walked around a corner and there it was. All along the trail, the
smell emanating from the bushes that separated us from the North
Saskatchewan River was unmistakable as the family made its way to a
suitable viewing position for the Canada Day fireworks.

"Lots o' skunks out tonight," I said to Ryan.

Then I watched for his reaction. He smiled. "Yeah, dad. Anything you
say."

The proper name is cannabis, although it's better known as marijuana. It
can be called many things - weed, pot, reefer, dope, grass, ganja, Mary
Jane and crazy Charlie.

(Before my mother passes out and whacks her head on the coffee table,
now might be a good time to point out I know this because I looked it up
on the Internet.)

It's in our schools and homes. Cops and teachers smoke it. Doctors and
lawyers smoke it. Teenagers and grandmothers smoke it.

And, yes, I've smoked it. (Note to desk: Please be careful with the 've
part of that last sentence.) But I didn't inhale. And another thing ...
I did not have sexual relations with that woman, either.

Marijuana is everywhere. The only place you won't find it is inside your
friendly neighbourhood convenience store. But after reading the story in
The Sunday Sun about B.C.'s $6-billion pot trade, I am stepping out on a
rickety limb to suggest it should be right beside the cigarettes.

Legalize marijuana. There, I said it. Put that in your pipe and smoke
it. I even have the marketing plan: More bong for your buck.

Wouldn't it be better to have the government regulate its use than leave
it up to the motorcycle gangs? OK, maybe not. Who would you rather see
getting all that money, Vietnamese organized crime or a disorganized
Liberal party that is a crime?

If you're caught with a "small amount" in B.C., cops rarely charge you.
They're more likely to just seize and destroy your stash. Although you
can never be sure of the destroy part. Let's say your son is going to a
party at Bob's place.

Would you rather have him staggering in reeking of beer, drunk as a
skunk, a slurring, puking mess? Or would you prefer he showed up
glassy-eyed, smelling skunky, a giggly, Doritos-inhaling philosopher? Do
you want him driving under the influence of marijuana or alcohol?
Neither, of course, but it's clear which is the lesser of two evils.

Better a stone than a stupor.

Better grin-faced than s--faced.

Sitting in a bar two-fisting beers and smoking cigarettes is acceptable
behaviour? And smoking a joint in your basement is not? The pot industry
has doubled in size in B.C. in just the last two years. It is now bigger
than the forest industry, and bigger than the manufacturing and
agriculture industries combined.

Why? Supply and demand. Plus, cops have more important things to worry
about. For every operation they close down, three more start up the next
day. Your head gets sore if you keep beating it against the wall.

I looked up cannabis on the Internet yesterday and found 18,375 Web
sites. I looked up marijuana and found another 44,320. That's all.

I understand there are going to be some readers out there who are
disgusted by my take on this subject. Besides my mother, I mean. How
could I say such a thing?

They will argue that marijuana is a "gateway drug" to heroin and
cocaine. Oh, come on. No more than Coors is a gateway drink to whisky.

What about drug addiction? I'll give you that, but what about alcoholism
and cigarette addiction?

I'm certainly not suggesting it's good for you and you should smoke pot.
But I am saying it won't kill you any quicker than alcohol will. One of
the sites I checked listed 24 positive effects of marijuana - including
euphoria, elation, laughter, an increase in creative, associative and
philosophical thinking, an altered perception of reality and also
peacefulness. Food even tastes better.

The same site listed four harmful effects and 24 ways the weed can be
used for medical purposes.

So, really, what's the problem? Especially if pot makes you peaceful and
booze makes you want to start a riot on Whyte Avenue.

Legalizing marijuana could do for B.C.'s economy what oil has done for
Alberta's economy. Just think. We could declare ourselves a country and
rule the world.